Leilani
  • Female
  • Canada
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About my Loss:
I lost my Mom last year to cancer. I am 30 and my Mom was not even 60, so the loss has come earlier than I ever thought it would. My Mom left behind a husband and 4 kids. I felt like I was getting through the loss and people kept telling me that I was "doing so well and being so strong," but it feels like my grief was only delayed. I am having a harder time now than I was closer to her death and cannot seem to get out of my Pajamas. I lie to people about being busy and sick because I don't want anyone to see how brutal things have gotten. I even lie to my partner about what I have done all day because I don't want him to worry about me. I dropped some courses in school to part time but can barely get to the work that I have left to finish just two courses. I just feel like I am wasting my days in this dark hole and cannot find the energy to pull myself out or even tell anyone how bad it is. I think that my partner knows but I put on a pretty good face most of the time. I just don't want anyone to worry but honestly, I am gettibg concerned for myself as it feels worse now than it did 8 months ago.

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Latest Activity

Jennifer replied to Robin H's discussion Lost my Partner who wasn't my partner in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Welcome to the group.  I lost my partner on February 5th this year, so it's still pretty raw for me too.  Reading through your story really touched a chord with me.  Like you, I didn't think I would ever find a group like…"
May 1
Jennifer joined Cathy Richardson's group
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Being the Other Woman/Other Man

This is for anyone who has lost their lover to death and you were the other woman/other man in their life. We have to grieve in silence. I can't find any support groups and feel like I'm the only one going through this situationSee More
May 1
Jennifer and William Gardener are now friends
May 1
dream moon JO B commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"i miss mom so mush i do"
Apr 11
Susan E Marshall commented on Susan E Marshall's photo
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My husband

"Thanks, Rosie. (I have memory problems and forgot about this site. I'm just seeing this now. April 6th)"
Apr 6
Natasha updated their profile
Apr 5
Angie Rowland joined Rita-Cecile's group
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LESBIAN ..GAY 2 SPIRITED loss and grief

Anyone who has lost their gay partner..soon finds that there may be a few things that are different...such as sorting through things and feeling like an intruder because it is also family stuff etcSee More
Apr 3
Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Assumptions

An assumption is an unexamined belief: what is thought to be true without ever really realizing that we think in that way. For better or worse, understanding starts with entertaining the idea that something is true.  Truly profound thoughts generally come to light from the relaxation of these (flawed) assumptions.  This is where I find myself today...Perhaps, one of the more significant drivers to pushing down the loss and grief at the time of the accident, ignoring it and mindlessly walking…See More
Mar 13

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