RatherNotSay
  • Female
  • Houston, TX
  • United States
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Not really feeling anything

My family is made up of my mom, my 2 sisters, 1 adopted sister (who lives elsewhere), 2 kid brothers, B (a family friend who is more like a grandfather), my significant other, and Mike ( B's son, who…Continue

Started Sep 7, 2018

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About my Loss:
My family is large. Its my mom, me, my two brothers, two sisters, and adopted sister,an old family friend who is basically more like a grandpa to me, my significant other, and the family friends son, who is also an old family friend who also dated my mom and they still really cared about each other and were talking about being together forever. The son's name was Mike. Exactly a week before his 40th birthday he suddenly collapsed. I was at work at the time. My family called an ambulance but the ambulance driver told him it was a pinched nerve probably causing his extreme pain. The ambulance driver wouldn't take him to the hospital, only offered to load him into his vehicle for my family to take him. Mike was always stubborn about going to the doctor after he had cancer, and after the ambulance drive left he just refused to go. About six hours later, he collapsed again and was crying in pain. (I had just gotten home.) When I saw how he was deteriorating, I told my family we had to force him to go. We struggled to get him in the car (my sisters, my significant other and I, because my brothers are only 9 and 10 and my mom and B (the family friend)both have old injuries that prevent them from heavy lifting. Mike was at the first hospital for a few hours and we waited while they did surgery. Turns out he had a torn aorta. They took him by helicopter to another hospital where they had better ability to do the surgery. We followed (my mom, B, and I) and we met his brother in law and niece at the hospital. He was in surgery for hours and then they came out and said that sadly the surgery (which they told us had a less than 1% chance of be successful)was successful but they declared him brain dead. They let us say goodbye and then they took him off the machines.

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Melissa replied to Charles Alexander's discussion New here after sons choice of suicide
"I am so sorry for your loss!! I do know and understand what you are going through!! My son Matthew took his own life in June 13th 10 day before his 26 birthday! He checked into a super 8 on a Monday and the staff found him dead on a Thursday!! When…"
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, I understand what you mean.  There will never be anymore of what we did together, IT IS FINISHED."
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Strike those vacations below, they'll never be another one.  Went on a memorial cruise with my daughter and family four months after she passed because she was so looking forward to it.  It hurt enough to know they'll be no more."
Oct 9
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yes Elynn, the loneliness.  That's painful.  They're not here and always was.  Our best friend, lover, and most precious thing we had.  We were lucky enough to spend the last 8 1/2 years together, joined at the…"
Oct 9
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I've had a rough few weeks.   August 31st would have been our 45th wedding anniversary.   September 27 was year 4 of my husband's passing.   It's pretty lonely around here.  Its difficult to talk…"
Oct 9
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Every day for me is the same day she passed.  Not a joyful or even an ok moment.  I spend a little time with the children and grands and do my best to hide my emotions, but they all know how I am inside, even the youngest grand at age 4…"
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I don't know if we can rethink our emotions that way. Our emotions are what they are, although reason can help us form our emotions and hopefully change them for the better. I don't know if my mom can hear me or not. I certainly…"
Oct 8
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"How are you all doing?  I had bad last 2 days. Felt lot of guilt and cried. There were some moments which made me remember my mother.  Also I hear comforting words by a lady that people who have gone from this world can still feel your…"
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morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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"What a horrible price to pay for love. "
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