Mike
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  • Hillsboro, OR
  • United States
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Latest Activity

Mike posted a blog post

From the Heart

I think being alone and being lonely are two different things. I find that when I am “being alone,” I am watching television at weird hours, thinking it is normal for a single person to think about such things as family pictures on the wall; wondering what happened to the little kids in those pictures, and thinking aloud that they all made it. Being alone and making a meal require little effort. I simply choose between an avocado or peanut butter. Neither one is necessarily a great choice, but…See More
Jun 17
Mike posted a blog post

From the Heart

What is a perfect love? Is there such a thing? Does it require anything special to hold on to it? What does it feel like, and can that feeling be maintained for a lifetime? Of course, I do not have the answers, but as usual, I have my opinions. I think there are so many kinds of love that a perfect love to me is one that I needed at a particular point in life.For instance, having been married for so long, Barb’s love for me was perfect. It provided a base, security, a great family, and, most…See More
Jun 8
Mike commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Thank you, Amber, I do believe that the little things add up and lead at least me in a forward direction.  Don't get me wrong, I like the huge neon signs as well, but most of the time I have to settle for the subtle ones. I love your…"
May 31
Amber O commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Hello.  I couldn't agree more with you on this. My 18 year old little sister passed away from cancer and we were very close, so as you can assume - it changed my life completely. When she passed, I drove myself crazy for the past 3 years,…"
May 31
Mike posted a blog post

From the Heart

I realize I spend a lot of my time waiting for something to happen. Since Barb died, my life has been made up of connecting the dots with the hope that they will lead somewhere. I am so convinced they will continue to guide me that I sometimes forget that it is not necessary to be like the kid on Christmas morning, patiently waiting to see what is going to be in the box. Just allowing things to happen, noticing them, and reacting to them would probably be less stressful. Instead, I am always…See More
May 29
morgan commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"I agree Mike.  And I absolutely understand the choice to not want to die.  And for some that is what happens.  I guess at times I just wonder how much of it comes from feeling that we have to somehow reconstruct under the pressure of…"
May 22
Mike commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Thank you for your comments, Morgan. I have no problem being accused of writing from inspiration to give hope.  Grief is a different journey for everyone, and I would be the last one to judge someone else's journey.  My writings cover…"
May 22
morgan commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"I find your posts to be written for inspiration but also somewhat disingenuous.  Not in a mean way but in a way that is pretentious.  Not meant to harm and certainly aspire to give hope.  But I am not sure that it isn't false…"
May 22
Mike posted a blog post

From the Heart

Losing anyone sets you on the path of going through stages that only you can determine. However, the promise that you will get through them and come out of the tunnel into the sunlight is somewhere in the back of your mind. Most people come through in time. The promise of being happy is so alluring that it cannot help but generate an interest in moving forward.     The reality of being amid that pain story leaves most of us wondering whether the established world really has any clue as to what…See More
May 22
Mike commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Thank you, Lynda. You are very kind. I agree about the "new different" I have found that no matter what loss has occurred, we can't help but be changed.  "
May 16
Lynda commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Mike, I'm so sorry for your loss. I heard a phrase a long time ago and I'm now using it to get through my mother's death. It captures what you said in your post. I just keep saying "this is a new different". You are very…"
May 16
Mike commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"That is beautiful wisdom Alice, thank you for sharing. I have found that neat bows aren't reality. "
May 13
Alice Thompson commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"I thank you too, Mike. You are honest and have written the truth, which is rare because people so often fall into the trap of tying up those loose, drifting ends into a neat bow. It reminds me of the simple advice a fellow, wiser griever gave me…"
May 13
Mike commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"Your welcome Anne. We are all in this together. "
May 12
AnneJ commented on Mike's blog post From the Heart
"{{{ Mike }}} Thank you for helping me along. With respect, AnneJ."
May 12
Mike posted a blog post

From the Heart

What I have learned: I can walk farther than I thought, ride a bike and look cool at the same time, and hike into the woods while listening for that voice that I can hear only when the wind is blowing through the trees.I have learned a family can survive the loss and get stronger day by day. I have learned kids are resilient and make it their quest to remind you that in some ways you now have become the child. Also, you are not allowed to die for a very long time.  That would be unacceptable. I…See More
May 12

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a Author of a newly released book entitled "My Compass, Our Story-a journey through death and life." I am also a certified grief counselor which I took on after the death of my wife.
About my Loss:
My wife died eight years ago after a short struggle with diabetes. We were married for 34 years.
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Mike's Blog

From the Heart

I think being alone and being lonely are two different things. I find that when I am “being alone,” I am watching television at weird hours, thinking it is normal for a single person to think about such things as family pictures on the wall; wondering what happened to the little kids in those pictures, and thinking aloud that they all made it. Being alone and making a meal require little effort. I simply choose between an avocado or peanut butter. Neither one is necessarily a…

Continue

Posted on June 17, 2017 at 12:04pm — 1 Comment

From the Heart

What is a perfect love? Is there such a thing? Does it require anything special to hold on to it? What does it feel like, and can that feeling be maintained for a lifetime? Of course, I do not have the answers, but as usual, I have my opinions. I think there are so many kinds of love that a perfect love to me is one that I needed at a particular point in life.

For instance, having been married for so long, Barb’s love for me was perfect. It provided a base, security, a great family,…

Continue

Posted on June 8, 2017 at 12:49pm

From the Heart

I realize I spend a lot of my time waiting for something to happen. Since Barb died, my life has been made up of connecting the dots with the hope that they will lead somewhere. I am so convinced they will continue to guide me that I sometimes forget that it is not necessary to be like the kid on Christmas morning, patiently waiting to see what is going to be in the box. Just allowing things to happen, noticing them, and reacting to them would probably be less stressful. Instead, I am always…

Continue

Posted on May 29, 2017 at 7:11pm — 2 Comments

From the Heart

Losing anyone sets you on the path of going through stages that only you can determine. However, the promise that you will get through them and come out of the tunnel into the sunlight is somewhere in the back of your mind. Most people come through in time. The promise of being happy is so alluring that it cannot help but generate an interest in moving forward.

     The reality of being amid that pain story leaves most of us wondering whether the established…

Continue

Posted on May 22, 2017 at 10:16am — 3 Comments

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Latest Activity

Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, our moms wanted all kinds of things for us. They wanted us to always eat our vegetables, to never get mixed up with bad influences, etc. Don't beat yourself up because you are grieving. You wouldn't be human if you didn't…"
49 minutes ago
Nancy replied to Richard Rivera's discussion FINALLY LOSING IT
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1 hour ago
Karen Wilson posted a blog post

Lost my Son -only child in March of this year

Hello -My name is Karen.  I lost my only son at 22 years of age in a car accident in March of this year. I am doing "okay" considering.  I have strong bouts of intense grief on and off and of course I miss and long for him daily. It really just SUCKS! I have surrounded my self with a support group and a Psychotherapist.  I have also started to explore my Spirituality and looking for unanswered to questions to my existence and purpose.  I welcome anyone that would like to share their experience…See More
2 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Really rough morning. I pray for some relief. This is not what my Mom would have wanted for me.  Bluebell"
2 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, it's horrible that someone would say, "It's not the end of the world" to you. That is cold. I am so sorry. Your mother in law... again, I am so sorry. You deserve better than that. We all do."
2 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hate to use the word resentment because I have enough on my plate right now. It takes energy to resent people. Negative energy. There is already too much of that in my life. The really hard part is that I got so much unconditional love from my…"
2 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett yes it can ruin relationships, I wont say who, but I was mentioning that I thought it was odd that a friend did not even call or send me a card when my mom passed, the person I was talking to said "its not the end of the world", this…"
5 hours ago
Jenn updated their profile
5 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Love is an amazing thing. There are times when I think that my mom has all the love that I have to offer, but there is always room for one more person. Even hundreds more.   people. "
13 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My heart is also with each one of you. Hugs and love to you all Bluebell"
14 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"One of the things that makes me feel very guilty (here) is that I do not want to discourage anyone who is making progress. I don't want to bring them down into the pit with me. I realize that there are people who may have recently come to this…"
14 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell and Brett we are all different we all grieve in different Ways some people grieve for shorter periods of time some people for longer I remember after my mother passed away I went to church they had a special mass with several priest from…"
14 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am becoming more of a functioning mess. I am able to see patient's now. I sleep a lot better. I try to exercise and socialize on a regular basis. But I have days when the sense of loss and sorrow is so overwhelming, that all I can do is cry…"
15 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Janie, of course you love your mom, and my mom certainly would not want for me to grieve the way that I do. I would not have wanted my mom to grieve my death this way. But I have to be honest about my feelings and my grief. Most of all I have to be…"
17 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bluebird, I always say we too. It is not just I because he lives in Heaven."
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jackie Cook It's been 4 years since I lost my Husband, it will always be us not me. "
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John T. I am surprised that I am still alive after losing my Husband 4 Years ago, I just go day to day hoping one day won't wake up."
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jennifer, Don't feel bad about not standing happy couples and family, It has been 4 years and I still feel that way. I just can't get over losing my kind, wonderful, Husband."
18 hours ago

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