Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
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I can resonate with this post. I can relate to how you feel.... a lot. My husband died three months ago, suddenly in his sleep of undetected cardiovascular illness. No one new he was sick. One day there and one day gone. I have heard so many comments about"at least they didn't have a long death" and yes,I agree with this, I would never what my Steve to suffer. Still, he was taken from us and we did never get to say goodbye, so for the loved ones, it still hurts. I sometimes feel guilty or selfish for wishing I knew, even for a day, so I could have said goodbye. I do not believe any death is better than another for those left. Still,I do believe when a death is totally unexpected and traumatic, a whole other element of loss comes in... it is hard to describe. But I am sure you have experienced it. Christmas is going t be awful and I just want to sleep. But I have children and family, of course, so I will be going through the motions. I will all the time be wishing Steve had just gone to the doctor for all the symptoms, in retrospect, were related to his illness, bc he could be living now.
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