Micah
  • Male
  • Lafayette, CO
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 29, a musicain, and generally a good person, but have always had problems with my drinking.
About my Loss:
I lost the love of my life because of my drinking, and my crazy behavior while drunk. This girl was 18 when we started dating, I was 26, we were together for 2 years, 3 months. We lived together for the entire relationship. She was my first real relationship and love. When we started dating, I had no car and lived with my parents. She basicly lived with me in my parent's house, and we moved out together after 7 months. I've always had blackout and attitude problems when drunk. At first I didn't drink too often, but after her and I got our own place together, and I joined a band playing drums, I started drinking like old times again. At first she was cool with it, and even told me she didn't care if I drank everyday. Then began the blackouts and my crazy behavior. I would yell, throw things, and just be hard to deal with. She had asked me to quit drinking a few times, and I would for a week and start up again after we would fight. I always had baggage in the relationship due to the fact that she slept with some guy from her work the night before our first date, and bragged in detail to her friends about it in front of me. That always hurt, and I often drank because of the grief of that. I ended up getting kicked out of the band, and losing my job shortly after me and my ex had an abortion. I had a good job, and it was stressful and depressing trying to find another job for that kind of money. I ended up with a stupid job and my drinking went from bad to worse. My ex started locking herself in the bedroom when I drank and wouldn't talk to me. This would hurt my feelings and make me mad. After a while of this going on, my ex started staying out late with her work friends. She gave me the drinking ultimatum which I agreed to, but after 2 days of that my ex stayed out with her friends super late, and didn't text me when she was going to be home. When she came home she had this lame excuse for being out so late and said she lost track of time. This angered me, so the next day after work, I went to a Buddy's house and drank. I texted my ex telling her where I was, and she demanded to know what time I'd be home. This angered me more I came home drunk, we had a fight, and she moved out of our apartment the next day. I tried to reconcile with her promising to change, but she distanced herself from me and even filed a restraining order on me. This crushed me and I have been on a downward spiral for the last 3 months since she left. I lost the apartment, a series of jobs, and my car, been to jail etc. Need to stop drinking and change my life. Sorry for the autobiography.

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