Worked at same place with loved one....now hate going to work

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Worked at same place with loved one....now hate going to work

My fiance and I met and worked together everyday. When we weren't at work we were spending time with our kids and families and more importantly together. He was the love of my life.  He had been to dr on Oct 21, 2017 when they suspected Lymphoma. The hospital took its goody ole time scheduling biopsy even after seeing large mass on groin.  He had been to hospital 2 times after that and still no rush. The day he was to get the results (Dec 5th, 2017), he went to his Dr and was immediately admitted to hospital (Stage IV Lymphoma). By that evening was being life-flighted to a bigger facility. They started chemo that week and after 2 rounds was starting to respond. They said he was doing well enough that after 3rd treatment (supposed to be 1-19-18) he would be transferred back to local facility. We were all ecstatic. Said we were just going to do a Vegas wedding because we didnt want to waste any more time. He died on the day he was supposed to get his 3rd treatment.  Now not only do I have to deal with the loss of the love of my life, the fact that all our dreams will never come true....but now I have to go to work everyday with the memories we created there as well. We would take our breaks together, work overtime together, etc. I struggle every day just showing up and merely just go thru the motions for 8 hours. I have no escape! Home reminds me of him, work reminds me of him and everywhere in between. Some at work have been supportive realizing how hard it must be, but some are just rude and expect me to get back to normal. We just passed the 6 week mark and I'm still miserable as the day he passed. 

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Latest Activity: Mar 7

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Lia Lynch commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Thank you Layla Richards. I was very religious before my husband died, Then after his death I started searching why we have to go thru such pains and was looking into everything. Then after reading the Bible, the Torah, the Koran and more religious…"
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Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
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Suzy Tatz commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I am new to this. I lost my dad June 7 2018 to lung cancer and my fiancé on Aug. 6. 2018 to colon cancer. I was caretaker to both and now I can’t stand being in my own skin. I have the panic feelings when I am alone. So I have been self…"
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Layla Richards replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"That is some great advice Ofir Rifo. Also, bluebird, something that helped me a lot was reading through the thousands of stories contributed by individuals who had a near-death experience or received an after death communication from a passed loved…"
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Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"ANA BECOAH BY ovadia chamama. Miracle prayer even for those who do not believe in anything. It will act as a password and will open the universe who will answer your petition. Please bluebird just try the same way a tried and it worked. Remember you…"
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BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia I am so sorry for your loss. Bluebell"
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Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Bluebird please go to you tube in listen to a song called Ana Becoh by Ovadiada Chamama. This song will act as a password to the universe. You do not need to believe in any religion but It worked for me and I am an agnostic. I lost my husband 21…"
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Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Hello Bluebird. I always remember you and wonder how you are doing since the last time I wrote to you for the first time when I found this blog. It has been a while and I was hoping by this time you were doing better. Please understand that you will…"
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