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Every morning I wake up I cry because I wish I wouldnt wake up. I hope every night that I will die in my sleep. Its so selfish I know, because of my son. I can't help it though. Its not fair on him to feel this way but I am plummeting further and further down into a black abyss and I can't find the strength to stop. Tony would have pulled me back. He knew just the right things to say to help me. God I miss him so much, why did he have to go, why....???
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I feel the same way our eldest son lives with me and I don't think he would cope if I were to go too, but I don't want to be here anymore it's like a living hell
Thank you for your comment Vicki. Losing the one you love is bad enough, but losing them suddenly and unexpectedly is just awful. He was my life, and there was so much we wanted to do, so much I wish I could say to him. I just exist for my son. But I am thankful that through him I still have a part of Tony still. Its not the same though. I am so sorry you have been through this also. I am glad you found someone to help you through it. I hope I can find the strength one day to accept help also. Much love. xx
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