I recently lost my husband due to depression and now reaching out to people to help me get through this rollercoaster of emotions. my main concern is my mental health as it has not been good the last 2 weeks and struggling with dark thoughts and need to stay strong to not give into temptation

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I am sorry you're having to go through this, Naomi. My husband died too, albeit from a different cause.  Have you considered therapy? It does seem to help some people, especially if you see a therapist who specializes in grief. And/or, do you have a spiritual leader (priest/rabbi/imam, etc.) you could perhaps speak with?

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