Every day it's gets harder and harder. The holidays were a blur and were not fun as they used to be. No one wants to give it at they're house. We got a rental room but it was timed...next year I may just go to Disneyland. I am in so much pain most of the time. I wanna live but I just my nephew was still here...wish I could have said good bye...he did so unexpectedly and suddenly...never got to say anything...I mis our talks and the funny stuff we used to talk about...I miss my nephew!!!