Doug
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  • Port Royal, PA
  • United States
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Unbearable loneliness
3 Replies

I have been struggling with a Major Depressive Disorder for a very long time and have been to numerous psychiatrists searching for help all to no avail. Some time ago I found out that for a period of…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Maggi Crowston-Boaler Apr 29, 2017.

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Doug's Page

Latest Activity

Doug left a comment for Cathy
"Hello Cathy, I'm sure you don't remember me even though we had talked once on the phone and sent a couple of messages to each other. I hope you're doing well. My situation is still close to the same when we last talked, but the…"
Aug 7, 2018
Doug joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
Aug 7, 2018
Doug replied to Cathy 's discussion My brother's death cirrhosis
"Hello Nancy, I don't know how both you, and Cathy, can carry on as well as you have after losing someone you loved so much? It's unbelievable to me that your husband's doctor could be so inept as to never test his liver function,…"
Jul 23, 2017
Doug joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Jul 16, 2017
Doug joined Steph's group
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How to move on...

How to move on after the loss of your significant other? Is this possible? When? Navigating through this process while also dealing with your grief. See More
Jul 16, 2017
Doug replied to Cathy 's discussion My brother's death cirrhosis
"Hello Morgan, I send my sincerest condolences to you for your loss and thank you for your kind words. I didn't share it in my post with Cathy, but when I was released from prison in 2006, I had moved to a new state because of an invitation by a…"
Jul 13, 2017
Cathy and Doug are now friends
Jul 13, 2017
Doug replied to Cathy 's discussion My brother's death cirrhosis
"Cathy, Please accept my deepest condolences on your brother's passing. When I first read the title of your post, "My brother's death cirrhosis", I can't begin to tell you how badly it affected me. Please let me explain, I,…"
Jul 13, 2017
Doug replied to Richard Rivera's discussion GETTING WEAKER NOT SURE HOW LONG
"Richard, I'm very sorry to hear about all that you're going through and I wish there was something I could do to ease your pain. Have you gone to a doctor or the emergency room at your local hospital yet? I can completely understand when…"
Jul 5, 2017
Doug replied to Clem's discussion Heroin finally won in the group Losing Someone to Drug Overdose
"Clem, There are no words that could assuage the pain you're going through. If there were I would certainly offer them to you.Your son sounds like he was a terrific guy and had to deal with more than he should have with the addiction as well as…"
Jun 12, 2017
Doug joined Laura Rozier's group
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Losing Someone to Drug Overdose

If you've lost someone you loved due to them overdosing on drugs, let's talk about it here.See More
Jun 12, 2017
Doug replied to Richard Rivera's discussion Anyone also form the New Jersey area?
"Hello,I no longer live in New Jersey, but spent a great portion of my life growing up there in places like Marlton, Edison, Medford. Mostly in South Jersey though. I have often thought of the same thing you have as I have some health issues and as a…"
Jun 3, 2017
Doug replied to Richard Rivera's discussion LIVING ALONE WITH NO ONE TO SPEAK TO? HOW??
"I know, and can feel, your unbelievable pain first hand. As I'm typing this, the need to end my own suffering today is as strong as it's ever been. There are no words adequate enough to lessen the pain you're feeling now, none.…"
Jun 1, 2017
Maggi Crowston-Boaler replied to Doug's discussion Unbearable loneliness
"October 22nd, 2012, my elder son was told he had late-stage Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Massive tumour on his right lung. Inoperable. Long story short: he went through HELL and he died just a month later. No counselling has ever been offered. I've…"
Apr 29, 2017
morgan replied to Doug's discussion Unbearable loneliness
"Doug,  I just read your post and I am so sorry that you have such a heavy burden of what life was and is.  Since my husbands death I've been on a quest to answer so many questions that seem to lead me to dead ends.  I can wonder…"
Apr 12, 2017
Doug posted a discussion

Unbearable loneliness

I have been struggling with a Major Depressive Disorder for a very long time and have been to numerous psychiatrists searching for help all to no avail. Some time ago I found out that for a period of about twelve years I had Hep C and never knew that I had it, until I began feeling sick everyday. I went to a doctor and was told that in the time I didn't know I had it, the virus had ravaged my liver and that my only hope was a transplant. My insurance company agreed that as a last ditch effort…See More
Apr 12, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
I have a difficult time explaining things about myself and I'm not sure why. At times I feel incredibly immature and overly emotional. It seems as if all my emotions are abnormal. By that I mean that compared to other people, my emotions seem to be extreme.
About my Loss:
You may find this strange and maybe not even possible, but the loss hasn't happened yet, but it will in the near future. Yet I still feel extremely sad and depressed and I've been that way for a very long time. My Mom died a few years back from Alzheimer's and my Dad provided her care until the very end. Now my Dad is suffering from Alzheimer's also and the fear I have of losing him is very real and unbelievably painful. I've waited too long to tell him exactly how I feel and the things I've always wanted to tell him, but put off.

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Latest Activity

Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bless you Morgan.  You say it all."
19 hours ago
Lisa is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
20 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan Thanks for sharing how you cope without your Husband.  You put into words what I cannot express. "
yesterday
Dolly commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Do we ever stop having those days that seem just like the day it all happened? when nothing else seems real and all we feel is the pain again? does it ever just not happen any more? "
yesterday
Martha Dee is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Part 2Linda, yes and yes, I "laugh on the outside and cry on the inside".  And the laugh (or just plain conversation) is just part of how I cope for when I have to be around others.  But it means nothing.  It’s like we…"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Part 1 Bless you and thanks to each one of you who keep writing about how you feel and how you cope.  I always feel support knowing I am not alone.  What I don't get (and not that any one of us can give it) is the answer to how I can…"
yesterday
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It's a Catch 22, impossible to solve.  I accept Her body isn't alive anymore, but I HAVE TO HAVE HER BODY ALIVE AND STILL WITH ME and I want that to be forever.  I know that's impossible, but I STILL HAVE TO HAVE IT!!! …"
Monday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Connie I'm sorry but just know your words do stay in my head. Keven's mom...I'm so sorry that phone came.  There's nothing I can say or do to make this easier on you.  Just know we know exactly how you feel.  Your…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Friends, As all of you have stated, I too fake my happiness. I laugh on the outside and am crying for him on the inside. I ache so bad that my Julian is not in my life. I just don't understand why God won't take me. Until he does, I…"
Monday
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan.  I wish I had answers but I am in the very same place.  Lost, fake and hollow.  I feel worse than I did a year ago I think because I thought I would feel better and don't. Empty and apathetic.  I'm tired all the…"
Monday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"morgan, I don't know why this has happened to us, our soulmates being torn from us, but it fucking sucks. Have you considered not acting happy and normal, since that isn't how you feel? Especially if acting that way isn't helping…"
Monday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Please somebody, tell me how I can continue to do this.  I am so depressed.  I get up every day and pretend.  It's what is making me so depressed.  It looks like I am functioning so normally.  Now that I have learned…"
Monday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Danny. Surviving is art which we all need to practice. Today I met a friend whose father is witnessing the similar illness as my mother i.e. late stage cancer. He is also going through the same emotional turmoil as I went in 2018. After this…"
Saturday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Danny. I hear you.  December will be 4 years "
Saturday
Danny replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Great reply Sandra"
Saturday
Danny updated their profile
Saturday
Danny commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Its been 5 years and here I am back on the site. Surviving and functioning but just about. "
Saturday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Wonderful Avi!!!  "
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Amen, Avi."
Saturday

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