Both at the same time??? I just dont understand...

Hey everyone all most 2 months ago now on July 13th 2011 I lost both my Mother (Donna) and Father (Bruce) in a tragic Semi-truck accident. My parents had been team over the road drivers for almost 7-10 years and my father had been over the road for 22 years so it was like second nature to the both of them. The accident happend in FL where they resided and they had actually just left the house that morning. The accident only happend about 50 miles away from where they lived actually at 8:30am that morning I unfortunatly live in IL so was not able to get to FL till 9am the next morning. I didnt even find out about the accident till 11am after their names and everything had already been released to the press. Then when I get down there they refuse to let me view the bodies this has been very hard for me to deal with. Now that the investigation is almost complete and they still have no answers cause there was no witnesses to the accident and no one knows what caused the accident they will release pictures to me of my mom and dad after the accident. A part of me wants to see them cause I have no closer then everyone else tells me not to do it to myself but i keep asking everyone when will see to believe stop i can not live with the feeling of not knowing for the rest of my life can anyone help.

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Permalink Reply by Ruth on October 10, 2011 at 8:52pm

Dear Amber,

I am sorry your conversation on this thread has been overlooked for so long.  Sometimes that happens; me I haven't been on the boards much since school started.  I don't know how far along your situation is now and I can only tell you what I've learned losing my parents separately and now that I'm older, as well.  My mom died of breast/brain cancer 20 years ago when I was 30 and my dad was murdered, stabbed to death at least 11 times almost 4 years ago.  I do not think it would be good to look at the photographs.  It would not make it any more real to you but it would be very traumatizing and could make your life much harder than it has to be.  I still think my dad just pulled up in his little Ford Ranger when I hear the neighbor's S1O rattle by.  I catch myself starting to dial his number to tell him some nature thing I just saw in the yard.  I had to look at crime scene  photos to explain a couple of details and while it was cleaned up as much as possible, without my dad's corpse there, it was still very graphic. I know when the trial starts this winter, I will probably not be in the courtroom for certain portions of the trial.  I already have terrible mind scenarios of his suffering and disfigurement, hearing the truth won't make it any better and might make it worse. I will pray for you in any case and let you know we are here.  (((hugs)))) and best wishes, Ruth

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