It's my birthday today but I don't want it to be .My Mom has been without me by her side since May the 9th ,2015.I am so broken inside. People around me have know idea how close I have come to being in her arms again.The thought enters my mind at least a few times a day.

I miss her so much ,I want to hug her ,to talk to her, be with her .Oh dear God it's so hard getting through a day.Now today has come and I know what my mom would say oh my baby girl is how old ~ say it is not I love you .

Please mom give  me another sign.I know you have been giving me signs I am getting them.Today is  a day that I really need something to happen as every minute that seems to pass I die a little more inside.Our big guy is trying to keep me here as he has such a love for me but I will tell you its nots easy staying in this world without my mom.

Mom I love you I am with you in my mind & heart.

Love your Kimberly

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Comment by Richard Ransom Beman on August 7, 2015 at 2:39am

Dear Kimberly, Your loss is very fresh and you are going though a "normal process" of grieving. You will always miss her, the advice, the wisdom, the memories. This is unfortunately a portion of our lives that there is no preparation for. When I lost my mother in 2003, I sought out a more "spiritual path", believing that all the people who have passed away and shared love are above us, looking down and at times giving helpful guidance. You will find that when you are having a vexing day and nothing is working out as it should, something will change and all will be right. It will be your mother helping you. She is there, I know your frustration. I would give all my possessions away to have another day with my mother. She was insightful in a way I am not and always gave the best advice and protected me. Since she is gone I have had to become a bit "street- wise" and become tough. I have no family left, so I need to protect myself from people who may want to take advantage of me, or borrow money, and I am becoming less fearful if a person comes up to me with a "sad story' that they need money or whatever.  God Bless you and I wish you the best !!!


Comment by Fighting hard on July 28, 2015 at 7:55am

I am so sorry that you are hurting so much.  I have found all of the "firsts" without your loved one to be extremely difficult.  I received some words that have comforted me on this very forum I would like to pass on.  I truly hope that it helps as I have felt what your are feeling just as recent as last week.  When the pain is so excruciating, "remember how much your Mom loved you and still loves you."  Remember the feeling you felt when you could see the love coming from her and she never had to even say it.  

I believe if we do our best to take it one moment at a time we will make our Moms who are still watching over us as proud as they would be if they were here.  I believe Moms pass their strength on to their daughters and sons.

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