Amy
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  • Frederick, MD
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How do I get unstuck?
3 Replies

I am having a hard time moving forward with all of this weight of loss and grievance. I lost my 56 year old dad, who I was exceptionally close with. He was my person. Most people have their mom as…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Dennis C. on Friday.

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Dennis C. replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"Amy, I am so sorry for your loss. The journey of caregiving is extremely difficult. The loss of our especially loved dear ones is unspeakable. There are so many different ideas about what happens to us when we die. Religion teaches many different…"
Friday
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
Jul 15
Amy and Brenda Ann are now friends
Jul 7
Michelle replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am a Christian. His suffering is over. In heaven you get a new body. So he got a new healthy body. What kind I don't know. This is what I believe. So I think he is happy and healthy."
Jul 6
Amy posted a discussion

How do I get unstuck?

I am having a hard time moving forward with all of this weight of loss and grievance. I lost my 56 year old dad, who I was exceptionally close with. He was my person. Most people have their mom as their person. I had two people as my person: my dad and my maternal grandmother. I my dad and I swapped spots in December and then lost him in March and my maternal grandmother and I swapped spots last October. I have to be her rock and had to be my dad's until the end. I have never been "rock-less".…See More
Jul 1
Amy is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 1

Profile Information

About Me:
I'm a married 27 year old college graduate without a job.
About my Loss:
My Dad. He passed away March 27th 2019. He was 56. He passed away to stage four Renal Carcinoma--Kidney cancer. They found it in December and it was all up and in his spine and both of his lungs. They did an unnecessary spinal surgery, removing 90% of the the cancer and a spinal disk and a half. I was with him from the last surgery in December until his death. I went down to FL thinking I was only going to be there a week. I was there for over three months fighting for him constantly to have what everyone dying is entitled to, comfort and content. I knew I couldn't make him happy, but comfort and content is a good goal, a hard goal, and worth it. I miss him. I was with him 24/7 for hald the time, the other half I was there +12 hours daily except Thursdays. And for that entire time I spent only nine days not with him. He needed someone to stand up for him because the drugs had him messed up and he needed help. I couldn't leave him on his own. Now I am on my own and I miss him so much. He had, had such a shitty end. No one deserves that kind of ending.
I am trying to move on with this baggage and without him...I am having a real hard time.

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Nancy is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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yesterday
Dennis C. replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"Amy, I am so sorry for your loss. The journey of caregiving is extremely difficult. The loss of our especially loved dear ones is unspeakable. There are so many different ideas about what happens to us when we die. Religion teaches many different…"
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I just feel like I am in a fog.  I have a little dog that is at least ten years old.  She adored my Mom & she has really grieved for her.  I know how you feel about your dog.  I worry about her.  She is all I have. …"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too Brett, I sit here an look at my 12 year old Labrador and I know he is on borrowed time, and my heart breaks, losing him will be something that I am not looking forward to. As you said Brett, we have the live our lives until we are called…"
Thursday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, I was looking at something that popped up on my Yahoo news feed. It was an article naming 106 celebrities who have passed away in 2019. So many names and faces that I remembered. Now they are gone, and they aren't coming back. Their time…"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett so true she was my security blanket I feel like I have no one to lean on that understood me like her You know what keeps coming in my mind. How true it is and scary that everything has a beginning and an end."
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hear it all the time you don’t know how lucky you were that your mother wasn’t sick and you didn’t have to take care of her I say to them lucky I was lucky that my mother died and I was not right by her side to tell her I love…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, the problem is that our security blankets were ripped away. Like you, sometimes I am glad to be sad. I feel like I am closer to my mom when I am crying. At least, her memory is fresher with me when I am in that zone. I feel like the hard reality…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, millions, billions of people have lost their moms. Sometimes someone will tell me that they have lost their mom, too, but they were able to deal with it, and they wonder why I haven't dealt with it as well. This may sound like an…"
Wednesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too ...I was sitting marking a paper yesterday and suddenly realized that I can’t see or talk to my mother about this or anything else and the tears came.  But I’m glad to think of her, in a way I can be glad to be sad sometimes.…"
Tuesday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sometimes will just be sitting down and I start to cry because I keep thinking I miss my mom so much my whole world is just not the same I think that I’ve become a different person it will be four years and I still cry I can’t put into…"
Tuesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Definitely a colder world now.  I like the image of the security blanket — like, as we go forward, we will always keep it but eventually may be able to wash it, fold it nicely, and put it in some place of honour close at hand but without…"
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The world just became a colder place when my mom died. I just remember feeling like all was right with the world when my mom was in the next room. "
Tuesday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is such a traumatic event, especially when you have had a wonderful Mom.  It is so hard knowing she is gone.  Knowing this is permanent.  There is no one that can fill the void she left.  My brother was close to Mom, but he…"
Tuesday
Cherie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 15
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
Jul 15
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"While I never forget that my mom is gone, for some reason it just hits me over the head sometimes. Just out of the blue I'll be like, "Mom is gone." It's horrible. It's ever present. And the thing is that it is always with…"
Jul 15
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My Mom also.  I could always talk to her about anything & knew she was someone I could totally trust.  I am constantly thinking of something I want to share with her & then I remember she is gone.  I loved spending time with…"
Jul 15
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"There is no doubt that it is anxiety. In fact, I think we are experiencing fight or flight. Since birth my mom had been my security blanket."
Jul 15

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