Carrie A Williams
  • Female
  • Kenosha, WI
  • United States
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My Mom and Dad
3 Replies

I lost both my parents in the last 12 months. They were both about 62 years young. My Father died of Cancer last June, and immediately after, my Mother was diagnosed with Picks Disease and passed…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by jolie Nov 15, 2009.

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About Me:
37 year old married mother of one 6-year-old daughter. I work from home as a Sales Manager for a Family Fun Park. I volunteer a lot of my time to my daughter's school and, this year, am also leading her Daisy Scout Troop. I try to keep myself VERY busy these days. Too much idle time is scary for me right now.
About my Loss:
I lost my Father to cancer at age 61 in June 2008 and my Mother to Pick's Disease less than one year later in June 2009, she was 62. I am an only child and took care of both of them. I was right there when each one passed. I was extremely close to my parents and feel as though one of the biggest parts of my life was just wiped away in the last year.

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At 9:35pm on April 23, 2013, Mary B said…
Yes, thank you for creating this group. It's so hard and I feel so alone. So wonderful to know this resource is here.
At 12:06am on February 28, 2013, Emily said…

Hi! I'm so sorry about your mom and dad. Thanks for creating this group. Please feel free to message me anytime. I lost my mom on Dec 27,2012.

There are days when I don't want to go out and face other people, as I just don't feel normal anymore. It seems that every day I'm just crying on the inside.

At 12:02pm on April 14, 2011, Patricia Gooderham gave Carrie A Williams a gift
At 3:54pm on February 13, 2010, Stacy Ballard said…
Carrie,
I am 38 and also an only child. I lostv my dad suddenly at 68 years old and now I am watching my mom, who is 62 die before me of grief. I am so sorry for your loses and pray you can be strong. Your story and others on this site have given me hope to go on. I would love to add you as a friend to my page. I just started this site in hopes of recovery.
Stacy Ballard
At 11:14am on September 12, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss said…
Carrie

Wow you have/had a lot of things to deal with, where you an only child. Mom my had no estate, her car I will transfer into my name and she was on ssi, so money. She died on the August 17th and her bday was the next day. I got her check on the 19th so i do not know if or how much i may have to pay back to ssi. Ssi were in the process of trying to take money away from her anyways.

She had two small 10 thousand life policies which I desperately need but I am afraid they will deny it as my cousin is an insurance agent and he said globe is notorious for not paying out and I have no money of my own. I had been taking care of her and not working, was going to get a job after school. My ex and I are seeing each other and he is helping me but he does not have a lot of money and i feel guilty having him take care of me since we are no longer married.....but on a positive note we have talked of remarry but he is taking care of his mom who is developing dementia.

This place has been so supportive and healing.
At 7:43pm on September 4, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss said…
Hi Carrie,

Mom had no estate just a car that I drove & I have her death certificate, when I get some money I will transfer the title. The main problem is money, thankfully Bryan my ex husband and I are very close and I hope we can remarry. Bryan has been and plans to help me.

None of my so called "family" has called me to see how I am doing. Have you heard of the book called "The Grief Club" by Melody Beattie it is very good. Nobody really knows what its like to loose both parents until they are in the club. You lose your past and I used to share everything that happened to me with her and now, there is nobody here and nobody who really cares it seems.

As for this so called friend I will see how it goes. True friends never need a break. Real friends put their self second and their friends first. This is a time when I needed a friend and she is too self absorbed to think about me. She over does it and is mad at me. This is going to be a very tough weekend, as we would have watched shows on tv and talked about my upcoming orientation and externship! Bryan listens but not like my mom did, I learned this too late as to how much she gave to me.
At 7:57pm on September 3, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss said…
Hi I talked to my "friend" and she needs space? I find that so irritating, I am the one who lost her mom and the only family I have left. She came over and did all kinds of work and because I did not respond the way I should she got all pissed off! So don't know what will happen there.

Good news I am in my final 8 weeks of Medical Assisting school and next week start orientation and then my externship, plus a venipunture visit and a flu clinic. This keeps my focus on other things I guess. I am all moved in!
At 10:31pm on September 2, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss said…
Sorry Carrie for repeating myself I have a hard time with that since mom died.
At 10:30pm on September 2, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss said…
Oh my goodness, pick's sounds horrible. So your grief is complicated as they say. With your mom it sounds like what they refer to as "the long goodbye". It must have been heart wrenching to watch your parents suffer. My dad was diagnosed on his 58th birthday with colon cancer & died one month to the date of his 63rd birthday. Mom had been sick for the last five months but I did not see it coming. The worst part is i found her.

I am sure it is hard on your husband and you. Men deal differently and its your parents and no matter how much our spouses love our parents they are our parents and it effects us. There is a saying I am sure you have heard.

When we lose our parents, we lose our past.
When we lose our spouse, we lose our presence.
When we lose our children, we lose our future.


Today i lost my best friend she decided that she no longer wishes to be my friend, I believe that it is for the best and I will meet other people who are more health for me than she was.
 
 
 

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