http://www.healthcentral.com/anxiety/cf/slideshows/8-tips-for-managing-stress-during-transitional-phases?ic=8833

It has not even been a week since her passing and today being a holiday to spend with family and loved ones giving thanks for ones blessings... As I sit in my home alone reflecting on my life and my many losses I can cry a river of tears and easily feel the need to retreat to a dark place . I am not gonna let myself do that ... My mother , all my grandparents, brother, aunts, uncle ,cousins, friends and beloved pets who have passed on would not want that for me. 

Sure I let myself…

Many say to take grieving a day at a time...but it is really a breath at at time...as we carry grief with us in every breath we draw in.

I have found since the loss of my beautiful mother that I have to think about doing things...instead of just doing them...and this is because I don't really…

Finally my episode is over! Whew! Every time I go through these episodes I gotta wonder if I'll live through it. This was a bad one no doubt about it. The nightmares were horrible. The anger was fierce, and the sadness overwhelming. I'm not sure if I learned anything from this one because it's too soon, but I'm so glad to be somewhat back to normal. I haven't thrown a temper tantrum like that for a long time. Anything within my reach I threw. My bedroom was a mess, and my house was also a…

My husband recently passed away and my spiritual beliefs are helping me to stay in a place of peace. Yes, his body failed. We have such fragile human bodies. But I know it is up to me to keep his spirit alive.

It has really been rough lately. Lil Dels birthday, the weather getting cold, and raising heck with my arthritis, and the topper, having to put down our precious dog Zero. I posted about Zero on facebook today. I wanted to wait to say anything about it out of respect for my husband, and Zero. Anyway my husbands cousin wrote, and said "Playing God is the worst part of owning a pet." I felt as if I had been slapped in the face. I thought she knew me better than that. I don't consider putting…

Today at 5:15 pm our best friend Zero went to heaven. The discs in his lower spine were slipped, and cutting off the nerves to his back legs. A few years back a man with no heart I presume, rolled our Zero down the gravel road right in front of my husband, and on purpose. That was the beginning of the end for our wonderful dog Zero. Since then Zero has had trouble with his hips, and back legs. It's a strange thing, but he had been acting like a pup for the last few weeks until this passed…

I played football today with a boy who said he didn't like me. Those few simple words tore my heart out. Yesterday I opened my computer and there was a picture of a tattoo that my husbands nephew just got on his arm. It was a picture of a cross with both of my sons names on it. It tore me up. Needless to say I didn't sleep at all last night. I have been feeling so good inside, and then one picture tore me to tears. It seems that along the way I always get blindsided by things like this. I'm…

Well after 2 years I finally put up a picture of my husband, Tom.  It is one of my favorite pics of him.  We were at the provincial fair and our youngest grandsons were playing around behind him.  He was having a good time that day.  It was taken almost exactly one year before he died.  On his list of things he wanted to do when he knew the end was coming was to take all the grandkids back one more time.  He did not make it. 

You would think after all this time having his smiling face…

We just passed the 9 month mark. It is just so surreal. My son in law and my granddaughter and I spent the day together. I wore a pair of her jeans, the urn/locket I have and one of her watches so she would be with us. We played putt putt golf, went to the video arcade and ate out. The weather was a typical cool fall day. She would have enjoyed it so much. The pain isn't as sharp as it was but all day the next day I felt such sadness and loss. I look at her picture and see that beautiful…

Last night I was reading Jo B's blog about all the why's. Then I read the response from Dennis C. I went to the biblical site that he recommended. I have been afraid to read a lot of the bible because I wanted to keep believing the way my heart has led me too. I read the scriptures on the page. There it was. My heart was right. God does not do these awful things that happen to us on this earth. The truth is when man allowed sin to enter into him, he also allowed satan to take over. It is…

I've been at the same job for over 6 years. My coworkers and management were there for me through my mom's illness and death. Today is my last day at this job. I start a brand new one on Monday. I'm having a hard time with it, as it's like letting go of my security blanket. I feel like this is a step in moving forward with life after my mother. I don't think I was mentally or emotionally prepared for this. It needs to be done, but that doesn't change the fact that it's really difficult.