"Thanks Morgan for commenting on my profile page. Wow...What u described that u go through every day of every year is exactly how I feel. I lost my girlfriend/fiance of 5 years to suicide. I know without a doubt in my mind that she is my soul mate so…"
If there was anything at all I could say, I would. No one who hasn't lost the love of their life can understand the amount of pain that stays with us for a very long time. I know at four years I was still banging…"
Jennifer is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
I am a deaf lesbian woman in need of a friend to talk to who understands the pain I am going thru.
About my Loss:
Lost my soul mate also deaf to suicide almost 2 years ago. Cant seem to get past this just seems lile every day gets harder and harder. The tears are just non stop everyday. I need help i dont know what to do to ease this pain.
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If there was anything at all I could say, I would. No one who hasn't lost the love of their life can understand the amount of pain that stays with us for a very long time. I know at four years I was still banging into walls essentially. It took me to get several months past five years before I didn't feel the helplessness of thinking will the pain ever stop. No the pain never stops but.....
I don't have the best news as I am now past the six year mark and the pain is still with me it just manifests differently. For me, what results from time passing is that my brain (on its own, or maybe by my training it) blocks the constant pain. I still get it intermittently (pretty much every day still) and it is bottomless. Excruciating. But it doesn't hang on me all day long.
My problem is I hate life. I hate opening my eyes every morning. I hate having to pout up with what I have to do on a daily basis. I want to join my husband because there is nothing for me here. But then, what if......that is the ONLY thing that has kept me halfway serving. What if......
All I can say is we all understand your pain. We can because we all feel the same way. We all just try to keep managing to cope There is no manual for how to survive the death of a loved one. Nothing other than feeling the pain. Its crappy encouragement.........wish I had better.......
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Welcome to Online Grief Support - A Social Community
"I dream about my Mom & Dad & thankfully they are always good dreams that are comforting. An Aunt that I was close to is in a lot of the dreams with my parents. I have one sibling. He is never in the dreams of my parents. I…"
"I rarely dream about my mom. When I do dream about her it is almost always bad. I had a horrible dream last night. It was very short. I was standing near the front door of my mom's house. I looked down to greet my dog. There was a little puppy…"
"Yes we have no choice but to live without our mothers. Grief and guilt will be there through out and some days will be really hard than others. Yesterday was pathetic for me as my father said something that really hit me. I hope to see my mother…"
"I relate to you all who have posted lately. 2 years for me. 2nd year was worse than the first as reality set in and shock lessened. I am still in a trauma state of mind. Forgetful, irritable, less patient. I isolate…"
"6 days ago my husband and soulmate was brutly murdered and everyday gets a little harder I haven't seen him yet he's held up at the corners and I'm terrified to see him but I need to see him to convince my mind that this is real and…"
"Robin, thank you. Bluebird was the honesty that i discovered on this site that made it possible for me to express what I go through. Several others who write let me know too. I tend to reach out here, particularly when I am…"
"Hi Morgan - I lost my husband John, 9 years ago, when he was 46. I come to this website every now & then, but have only commented a few times. I relate most to you and Bluebird. I can't believe it's been 9 years, and…"
"I really don't know what to say to all the newer people who come here looking for help and comfort because I have struggled for years. I did find an article written by a psychotherapist just the other day that made some sense to me about the…"