Curtis Clark
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I lost my father to suicide
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A few years back I lost my father to suicide. He was 62 years old. Not the age you expect your male role model to take their own life. As with all suicide, it was extremely complicated and my family…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Curtis Clark Dec 14, 2021.

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Curtis Clark replied to Curtis Clark's discussion I lost my father to suicide
"Thanks, Ros and V.R. for watching. Feel free to share it with anyone you think could benefit from it. It's the internet's now.  -C-"
Dec 14, 2021
V. R. replied to Curtis Clark's discussion I lost my father to suicide
"Yes, Curtis, this film surely helps whoever is feeling the burden of regrets, to start putting them aside and start coming to terms with their loss. It's human nature, we don't have the ability to foresee the future in order to try and…"
Dec 14, 2021
Roslyn replied to Curtis Clark's discussion I lost my father to suicide
"Many thanks Curtis for such a very special film. Sincerely Ros"
Dec 13, 2021
morgan left a comment for Curtis Clark
"Thank you for placing the link to your film.  Admittedly it brought me to tears.  And you are right.  It is regret for all the things I should have said or might have said or all the things I still wanted time to be able to say.…"
Nov 14, 2021
Curtis Clark posted a discussion

I lost my father to suicide

A few years back I lost my father to suicide. He was 62 years old. Not the age you expect your male role model to take their own life. As with all suicide, it was extremely complicated and my family was left with many unanswered questions. His death sent me into a tailspin. I was angry. Confused. Grieving. My worldview shattered. More anger. But it was regret that was the most difficult thing for me to deal with. Sinking, festering regret. Most of you here know what I’m talking about. Wishing…See More
Nov 6, 2021
Curtis Clark is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Nov 6, 2021

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About my Loss:
I lost my father to suicide.

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At 2:20pm on November 14, 2021, morgan said…

Thank you for placing the link to your film.  Admittedly it brought me to tears.  And you are right.  It is regret for all the things I should have said or might have said or all the things I still wanted time to be able to say.  Just to keep the connection going.  Instead all I feel is loss.  And I suffer still to this day..... soon to be 9 years later.  

I want to leave this earth and don't have the courage (as of yet) to take the plunge.  Surely not something you want to hear having a father who took his own life.  But I am suffering greatly and living without the man who made my heart beat I have coped with the pain the best I can.  

I used to be on this website day in and out pretty much. It was a lifeline for me.  Talked with many people who suffered the same as me losing a spouse.  I could bet that those of us who were here then for quite awhile still would be thrilled to leave earth.  Sometimes the pain is just so much to bear.  Now I stay to myself and try not to have to burden others with my inability to manage very well.  

I function better but I am not "living".  Those are two separate and distinct things.  But I do wish there was just more "time" that I would have had because I was so in tune with his world.  More time.......and now I wait as I have to believe that the cord between us is still there, just invisible.......

 
 
 

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bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
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