My mother died in december of '06. exactly 15 days before Christmas.
It was a drug overdose that killed her, but she was not an addict. She was very sickly her whole life and every time she got a back pain or a migraine, all the damn doctor did was prescribe another medication. She didn't know what she was doing and she took more than she needed because the drugs messed her up.
I had become accustomed to her drowsiness. In her last years, she was rarely ever herself. I missed her even before I lost her for real. It was like she was dead before she dead.
I'm still dealing with all these emotions and I need help to work them out. I need someone to listen. I miss my mom so much. I was so much like her, and I connected with her more than anyone else. I still needed her...
AMBER , I know your heart aches for your mom. But you need to know you love her and keep loving her and she loves you. The love goes on. Do something special for her , her favorite foods or a dinner and invite family and relatives on her birthday. It will be good for you. I feel she knows too. Pray alot too. You need God all the time. He will strengthen you and lead you. , John
My mom passed away in April and it's been the hardest thing I have ever went through, but I can't even imagine what it must be like to lose your mother at your age, Amber. I know how much you still need her, especially in your teen years. You are in my thoughts and prayers...
Thank you; I sometimes hesitate to speak (type) the truth of how this is for me, as the last thing I want to do is make it worse for anyone else. At the same time, I know that it helped me to find others online whose truth was similar to…"
"Sorry to see your stories here... There is nothing worse. I will be at 4 years in June. After a while at least for me, the acute pain just became dull pain. I have heard that grief is love turned inside out. No…"
"Thank you bluebird for always encapsulating the horror movie we live in in a way that is gentle but firm. I can only nod my head in agreement with each of the points you made because I am so exhausted by trying to explain this widowing to…"
"Martee, I am so sorry you are also in this hell. I really have no hopeful words to offer; for me, any meaningful life ended when my husband died. I didn't survive, my body just hasn't died yet. There is no joy in life anymore, for me.
"Re doing things we did together I was thinking more of making piecrust with my mom, or the right way to chop vegetables, or starting plants from cuttings, not anything like vacation travel. When my husband died several people, including…"
"Brenda, I think that people look too hard to find some thing very big. That something that makes you happy could just be a doughnut. When you are taking baby steps it's just a matter of getting from the chair to the couch.
That's what I…"
Nice to have your words and well wishes here. We all know this journey all too well. There are days u dread as well, and on those days we all have, we just need to be very gentle with ourselves. That's something I'm…"
"Re baby steps, one thing that has helped me is doing things that we did together, or learning to do things that she did. It might sound sad or even heartbreaking, to do those things alone, and if it feels that way it’s not the right…"
"Day by day. Minute by minute. Find something, anything that makes you happy and focus on it. For me it's my dog. When she is gone I will focus on something else. It could be anything.
If that doesn't work, do it for your mom. Carry on for…"
"For me it now has been three years ... three years and four months.
I survived first by distracting myself from it, thrust into work and no time to think, it would only come back at evenings and nights to haunt me ...
I guess what helped me was…"
"Bluebird, so sorry for you loss,your posts spoke my feelings exactly on grief and pain of living. Can you please let me know how you survived all these years.
Its been just over 2 weeks and each day is an eternity for me I hope I don’t…"
"it has been almost 6 years (my mom passed away on Feb 18, 2014) since my mom (56-year-old) passed way, it still feels like yesterday..I can't believe it..anyone here whos still here after all these years?"
"Brett, I am looking for the same light at the end of the tunnel. I feel the same way about my dog he is a Labrador and its so so difficult to see him limp or have a bad day, he takes meds, I just want him to be comfortable. I say to…"
"Brenda, I rely on my faith so much, but I realized a long time ago that there won't be a magic moment where an angel comes down and tells me that everything will be okay. I'm not criticizing God. I just realize that this is something that…"