Richard Barns
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  • Kent
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About Me:
41 live in Kent
About my Loss:
I lost my partner of only 4 months in May 2015, burial less than a week ago (23 June 2015). He had a gastric bleed and died without me there but thankfully his family was, so did not die alone.

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Comment Wall (2 comments)

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At 8:08am on July 15, 2015, Susan H said…

Hi Richard,   I am so sorry for your loss and pain!   I truly understand.  Time does not matter – Grief and Loss do not discriminate.   My relationship with my Soul Mate was 3 months also.   But, we just “knew”!  We “clicked” immediately and were inseparable – kindred spirits in this world.  We talked about the future; we profoundly loved each other in a way that neither of us had ever experienced.  We often talked about how amazingly beautiful it was.  Our relationship, as I suspect was yours, was intimate in its truest form.   We blended our hearts.  Our hearts beat as one.  When he died, half my heart went with him!  The pain has been unbearable. 

It is true that we were not afforded the opportunity to build many memories.  We did not experience holidays together or many events that I can relive in my mind.   In some ways, that may be a blessing.  However, it is also a curse!   I feel that my future was stolen from me – and that seems even more tragic.  You were robbed of a future with Dave!  Why?   I do not know if you struggle with the “Why?” question or not but it haunts me every day.   I do not understand why?  

Nevertheless, do not let anyone tell you that you shouldn’t be grieving!   Time is irrelevant!  The time spent together is immaterial and the time we need to grieve is no one’s business.   It is our journey.  We know it’s a lonely journey.  No one can make this better for us.   We must walk it alone.   So, give yourself permission to feel what you feel.  You have earned that right!   Hugs!

At 1:07pm on July 2, 2015, Janet Hunter said…

I am very sorry for your loss.  How did you find out about this group?  It's the only form of support for me.  Thanks for the friendship.



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