Carla Rose
  • Female
  • Rego Park, NY
  • United States
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  • Renee Rugenstein
  • Jenny Renn

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Latest Activity

Sandra Walt replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Avi, my sentiments and words to you are the same as when I responded to Carla.  Just the fact that you are already posting and wishing strength for someone else shows me that YOU have deep strength. I am so sorry for anyone on this journey. xo"
May 30, 2018
Avi replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"I lost my mother on 15 may 2018 and I completely agree with you that we wish it was a bad dream. But unfortunately need to face the truth. I wish strength for you"
May 29, 2018
Sandra Walt replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Good morning, dear Carla. I am so sorry by this tremendous loss in your life. It's not only the loss of your beautiful Mother, suddenly, but you're trying to make sense of something so senseless. It seems compounded by the fact that you…"
May 29, 2018
M replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mom on January 7 due to complications from a fall at home. My father passed seven years ago, I'm an only child, and am 42 with no spouse or children of my own. I feel untethered to this world, purposeless…"
Mar 9, 2018
Theresa replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"I am in the same situation, my mom died suddenly and unexpectedly from cardiac arrest, I spoke with her twenty minutes prior to her CA. I have no one, yes it makes sense to me."
Mar 4, 2017
Carla Rose replied to Erin's discussion I went home early... in the group I miss my Mom!
"    I understand that feeling. That morning, I was busy, and didn't check my e-mail until after 11 am. Only then did I notice the absence of my Mom's usual good morning e-mail, and try to call to see what was going on. Only then…"
Feb 24, 2016
Carla Rose joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
Feb 13, 2016
Carla Rose joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
Feb 11, 2016
Renee Rugenstein and Carla Rose are now friends
Feb 10, 2016
Carla Rose replied to Renee Rugenstein's discussion Missing my Mom so very much in the group Lost Without My Mom
"    I'm sorry you hurt so much. I can empathize My mother passed away very unexpectedly this past weekend, and I just can't keep going over the whole chain of events in my head. My mother and I were very close, and now, with no…"
Feb 10, 2016
Carla Rose and Jenny Renn are now friends
Feb 10, 2016
Jenny Renn replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Hi Carla First of all, I am so very sorry that your Mom has passed.  I can imagine the shock of her sudden passing, this is a great touch stone to come to and share your feelings.  There are so many people on here with so many different…"
Feb 10, 2016
Carla Rose added a discussion to the group Lost Without My Mom
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Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago

Hi, I'm new around here. My mother passed away on Saturday February 6th, very suddenly and unexpectedly. We were in touch every day, via text, e-mail and phone calls, and we saw each other every weekend. We've always been close, but especially since my father passed away almost two years ago now.     That's how I knew something was very wrong on Saturday morning when I couldn't get in touch with her, and that's why I called 911. The EMS workers found her lying on the couch as if asleep. She…See More
Feb 9, 2016
Carla Rose joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Lost Without My Mom

My mom died, August 17, 2009 of an apparent heart attack from heart failure. Her doctors never told me how sick she was and so I was blown away and am heart sick and lost without her.
Feb 9, 2016
Carla Rose updated their profile
Feb 9, 2016
Carla Rose is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Feb 9, 2016

Profile Information

About Me:
I'm a thirty four year old female. My primary interests are in writing and education. I appreciate beautiful scenery, finding reasons to laugh and make others laugh, listening to music I like, having good conversations, and losing myself in fictional worlds. I struggle with all kinds of challenges, and my Mom has been a constant source of help and support to me through my entire life. Through all kinds of tough times, my Mom has always been there, always been the person I have felt safest and most comfortable with, right up until the day she unexpectedly died.

My mother and I had always been close, especially since my father passed away almost two years ago. My father was thirteen years older than my mother, and he died a slow, painful, dignity-robbing sort of death. It was a hard loss, but I had my mother, and we supported each other through his illness and death. Now, I've lost my mother too, and with no warning. I have no siblings, and I'm unmarried with no children.
About my Loss:
My mother's body was just found on February 6th, 2016. I had spoken to her the previous night, and she seemed fine. She always checks in with a good morning email to me, and that day, she did not send one. I called her cell and landline repeatedly. When there was no response. I called 911. They found her on the couch, not breathing, no pulse. I don't know how or why this happened. I've never felt this empty, lost and afraid. I don't know how to live in this world without my mother.

According to the autopsy, she had bad heart disease. She had high blood pressure, and three very clogged arteries. We had no idea anything at all was wrong with her heart.

The above picture is of my Mom and me on December 31st, 2015. We were at our favorite Barnes and Noble, and sad that that location would be closing that day. We knew that was our last chance to go to that Barnes and Noble together. We assmed we'd still have many more years together. We never imagined that my mother had just a little over a month left to live at the time this photo was taken.

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Latest Activity

Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hear it all the time you don’t know how lucky you were that your mother wasn’t sick and you didn’t have to take care of her I say to them lucky I was lucky that my mother died and I was not right by her side to tell her I love…"
12 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, the problem is that our security blankets were ripped away. Like you, sometimes I am glad to be sad. I feel like I am closer to my mom when I am crying. At least, her memory is fresher with me when I am in that zone. I feel like the hard reality…"
18 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, millions, billions of people have lost their moms. Sometimes someone will tell me that they have lost their mom, too, but they were able to deal with it, and they wonder why I haven't dealt with it as well. This may sound like an…"
18 hours ago
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too ...I was sitting marking a paper yesterday and suddenly realized that I can’t see or talk to my mother about this or anything else and the tears came.  But I’m glad to think of her, in a way I can be glad to be sad sometimes.…"
23 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sometimes will just be sitting down and I start to cry because I keep thinking I miss my mom so much my whole world is just not the same I think that I’ve become a different person it will be four years and I still cry I can’t put into…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Definitely a colder world now.  I like the image of the security blanket — like, as we go forward, we will always keep it but eventually may be able to wash it, fold it nicely, and put it in some place of honour close at hand but without…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The world just became a colder place when my mom died. I just remember feeling like all was right with the world when my mom was in the next room. "
yesterday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is such a traumatic event, especially when you have had a wonderful Mom.  It is so hard knowing she is gone.  Knowing this is permanent.  There is no one that can fill the void she left.  My brother was close to Mom, but he…"
yesterday
Cherie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"While I never forget that my mom is gone, for some reason it just hits me over the head sometimes. Just out of the blue I'll be like, "Mom is gone." It's horrible. It's ever present. And the thing is that it is always with…"
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My Mom also.  I could always talk to her about anything & knew she was someone I could totally trust.  I am constantly thinking of something I want to share with her & then I remember she is gone.  I loved spending time with…"
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"There is no doubt that it is anxiety. In fact, I think we are experiencing fight or flight. Since birth my mom had been my security blanket."
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is still numbing to think my Mom is gone & I can't talk to her or see her again.  I lost part of me when she passed.  Someone said the restless feelings I have are really anxiety.  Daily crying is part of my life. …"
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I would rather cry on the outside than on the inside. Crying on the outside is a release. I am really tired of being sad. I'm also tired of being scared. Life without my mom still seems like a scary proposition. All we can do is to continue to…"
Monday
Profile IconGeorge Makhniashvili and Amatullah joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday
Brett Bowman replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"You and I experienced something very similar. You are not an anonymous person who lost her mother. I just wish that I knew the words that would make it all better. I don't. I'm still trying to figure it out for myself. All I know is that…"
Saturday
Lynn Fisher replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you so much for your kind words.  It means a lot to me that you would take the time to bring me some peace, which you have."
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"So glad you have your daughter.  I was so close to my Dad & so many wonderful memories of time I spent with him.  It has been over four months since I lost my Mom.  I try to stay busy, but still have a lot of grief…"
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Hope everybody doing good. My daughter is growing up and keeps me busy but any day I sit and feel guilty of not serving my mother, I feel like crying. She should have enjoyed so much with her grand daughter but destiny had some other…"
Friday

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