Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Don't grieve alone.
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Benny Shipton
- Female
- United Kingdom
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Benny Shipton's Groups
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Traumatic, Sudden Loss
57 members
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I Miss My Parent(s)
22 members
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I love my Dad.
80 members
Benny Shipton's Page
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Latest Activity
This weekend will be one year since my dad died, i haven't been on here in a while. I've been getting really down alot recently, and also angry. I can feel myself taking my anger out on my mum, and i know i shouldn't. I want to stop myself but i can…
You know everyone grieves differently and in their own way. When my dad passed away in 2003, I wanted nothing more than to follow along with him. My father was the only one I had to talk , to at the time, who in his eyes I never did no wrong. Well,…
sorry it took me so long to write to you. i'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. I lost mine over 10 yrs ago and still miss him dearly. speaking from experience I know that you have to stop right now and do your grieving. when our daughter died I was…
it would have been my dads 51st in august, and the whole family got together and had a nice day remembering him, at the end we covered the garden in candles it looked beautiful.x
my dad died suddenly from a heart attack, aged 50, he was watching the film alexander before i went to bed and we had a conversation about why they had irish accents in the film, then i said goodnight and 15 minutes later i heard something crash int…
When my dad died 7 months ago i didn't really allow myself to grieve properly and i just got back to work and going out with my friends, and drinking alot. now i look back and can't believe how much time has passed. I feel like i want to stop everyt…
Im sorry for your loss, my dad died 7 months ago (still feels like yesterday) and it is only really just hitting me that it is forever. However you are feeling is normal, because everyone has to be able to deal in whatever way comes naturaly to them.
I got some more!
The doctor told me the counsellor was reserved for serious cases!
The counsellor on an 0800 free counselling phone line told me the line was for crisis' .
I accepted both of these ridiculous comments and found myself feeling like my…
Hi Benny,
thanks for that I totally understand,
heres one for ya -: "these things happen." they mean shut up and stop winging.
We are allowed to grieve, to be sad and mourn the death of our loved one.
Heidi - keep your Mum's name in the present tense - I keep my daughter's name in the present tense even now 8 years on. And you are quite right - they will always be present in our hearts - love and hugs to you Gail x
I created this group for people who may be grieving one or both parents. I lost my Mom and Dad within one year of each other. Dad passed away from Lung Cancer and Mom passed less than one year later from Pick's Disease.
The past tense thing really makes me mad but, when I talk about my Mom in the present tense I sometimes feel like people think I am loosing it....I feel like talking about her in the present because she is present in my heart.
Profile Information
- About Me:
- I am 21 year old female missing my dad.
- About my Loss:
- My dad died of a heart attack on March 15th 2009, i was in my room when i heard a crash against my bedroom door. I walked out to see my dad lying on the floor dying. It was just me and my younger sister in the house at the time and the ambulance took so long to come. I heard his last breath and knew that he was gone, even on the way to the hospital when my sister was asking if he would be ok, i couldn't answer her. I feel so guilty that i wasn't able to save him. He was only 50 years old.
Benny Shipton's Blog
One year on
This weekend will be one year since my dad died, i haven't been on here in a while. I've been getting really down alot recently, and also angry. I can feel myself taking my anger out on my mum, and i know i shouldn't. I want to stop myself but i can't, and after i'm done i hate myself for it.
I can't believe how quickly this year has gone by. Most of it i can't even remember.
I don't want to do anything, i don't have the motivation to get up and go find a job.
I don't wan
… ContinuePosted on March 11, 2010 at 10:07pm —
Times going too fast
When my dad died 7 months ago i didn't really allow myself to grieve properly and i just got back to work and going out with my friends, and drinking alot. now i look back and can't believe how much time has passed. I feel like i want to stop everything so that i don't get any further away from when it happened. I want to be able to break down and take some time to deal with this but i feel like i should have done it 7 months ago, and now the world around has moved on and it's like im not allowe… Continue
Posted on October 18, 2009 at 8:31pm — 2 Comments
annoying things people say..
i know there is one of these in the i miss my son or daughter forum but i wanted to write a few that have really p****d me off
The worst is the people who say it will be hard but you will get over it eventually
- no, you dont "get over it" you learn to live with it a little. i dont even want to get over it.
Some people have said "at least he didn't have to grow old"
- What? Because that's a bad thing?
the past tense.
- it annoys me how easily people can use my dads name in the past tense, it… Continue
The worst is the people who say it will be hard but you will get over it eventually
- no, you dont "get over it" you learn to live with it a little. i dont even want to get over it.
Some people have said "at least he didn't have to grow old"
- What? Because that's a bad thing?
the past tense.
- it annoys me how easily people can use my dads name in the past tense, it… Continue
Posted on September 14, 2009 at 12:08pm — 5 Comments
Alone?
Am i alone? I certainly feel it. Along with an extreme amount of guilt for not being able to help my dad when he was dying, anger at my sister for hiding downstairs while it was happening. Regret that my older brother and sister hadn't seen him for a month. Confusion that i had a normal conversation with him, said i love you and goodnight, and half an hour later he was gone.
All of these feelings that i have had before in other circumstances, yet personifed by a thousand.
I need help.
All of these feelings that i have had before in other circumstances, yet personifed by a thousand.
I need help.
Posted on August 31, 2009 at 5:19pm — 4 Comments
Comment Wall (1 comment)
- At 12:52pm on September 3, 2009,
Lou LaGrand, Ph.D. said… - Benny:
As a counselor, let me suggest your sister stayed downstairs out of fear. My brother helped my father more than anyone, but when he was told that morning that Dad was going to die, he could not be there. He went to work as he could not face death. Fear of death is a terrible thing to have to deal with for many people.
Groups
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I love my Dad.
80 members
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Traumatic, Sudden Loss
57 members
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Losing Someone to Cancer
56 members
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I miss my Mom!
48 members
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Missing my Son or Daug…
47 members
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Multiple Losses Group
30 members
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I Miss My Parent(s)
22 members
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Tattoo Memorial
18 members
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Caylee Marie Anthony
18 members
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Lost Without My Mom
16 members
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mY sOuLmAtE, mY bEsTfRiE…
15 members
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Orphaned Adults
9 members
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for loved ones who have…
9 members
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Missing Michael Jackson
5 members
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Losing a Sister
5 members
Latest Activity
She was only 11 months older than me, she was 31 full of life, love and kindness. growing up we hated each other and then grew to be great friends. i miss her!!
For anyone woman who has lost a sister.
Hi Jennifer, my son would have been 17 this Friday (March 19). I dread Friday, I also have to view his autopsy this week. So I am preparing myself for a major case of depression. I hope all works out for you and your family. God be with you during t…
next month will be 1yr since my son was killed,his bday was hard enough but to have to deal with the annivesary and the trial coming up,i feel more depressed every day
I'm new to this group. I lost my mom three days ago and my heart is breaking. This was really a blessing for her as she was trapped in a body that no longer served her. Being bedridden for a year was so hard to watch. This once vital woman depenent…
I created this group for people who may be grieving one or both parents. I lost my Mom and Dad within one year of each other. Dad passed away from Lung Cancer and Mom passed less than one year later from Pick's Disease.
Hi Deneene I just read your message. I lost my 16 year old son due to a drug overdose on Dec 26, 2009. I just wanted you to know that I understand what you mean about not realizing how bad it was until after. The what-ifs some days and nights just w…
I'm not doing well!!....I lost my fiancee in a car accident Oct.27 2009. Anyone that says it gets easier with time is wrong. It's getting harder and harder everyday. I feel like my life is over too. I can barely get out of bed and I've become physic…
I'm very sorry for your loss, It's hard to relate to friends when they dont understand or havent been through the same things you have. I'm 16 and lost my mother a week ago to a brain anuerysm, death is hard to face and deal with, i give my best to…
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Healing Grief Support
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Books
To One In Sorrow
Let me come in where you are weeping, friend,
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.
-Grace Noll Crowell
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.
-Grace Noll Crowell
The Light Beyond
Living your life backwards
Ben's first duty as a new pastor was to conduct a funeral service for Albert, a man who had died in his eighties. Since he didn't know the deceased, he invited members of the congregation to say a few kind words about Albert. No one budged. "Many of you knew Albert for years," Ben prompted them. "Surely someone can say something nice." After an uncomfortable pause, a voice from the back of the room said,...Bereavement Overload - Coping With Multiple Losses
How can anyone cope with the death of more than one family member when those deaths occur in a short period of time? What happens to the person who is grieving the death of a loved one, then loses a job, and has to move from their home or apartment because of financial conditions? Multiple losses occur more frequently than most people realize and they can complicate the mourning process. To begin with, it is...7 powerful ways to deal with grief
An interesting article just came in from the singer and songwriter Barbara Lewis, and I though it was so helpful to those coping with the loss of a loved one that I am reproducing it here: As a long-time performer - singer/songwriter - many events from my private life have appeared in songs. When my brother took his own life, and many years later, when my beloved husband of thirty years suddenly died, I brought...How to find the perfect funeral poem
Reading poems at a funeral can provide comfort to those who are suffering from the the loss of a loved one. Poets have the gift of being able to use words to give expression to the most sublime sentiments of the heart, and many of the most famous poets in history have used their talents to write about death and dying. Some poems about death can be dark, with emphasis on the misery of the...Losing my wife during child birth and looking after my 4 young children
My name is Steve Carter and I live in Glengormley Northern Ireland. I am writing to you today to tell you my story about my lovely wife and my fantastic children. I find writing this helps me through the heart ache and pain that I have suffered over the last 10 months. This is my story... I met my wife Denise while we were both travelling around the world. I was on my sixth year...Badge
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