Don't grieve alone; 13,500 members and growing
When does the pain and regret of all the things I coulda done and shoulda said go away? Why do I have to think of it literally every waking moment and even as soon as i wake up in the middle of the night simply because i have to pee and dream about it when I'm actually able to sleep. We were seperated for almost 2 years before he was killed so why does it hurt so bad now that he's gone? Why?.... because he was my best friend, because we still talked. All day. Every day. Because we still lived as tho we were together and just living seperate. Even tho he was 500 miles away. Because we loved each other sooo much but just couldn't make it work. Because if i wouldnt have had him leave here he woulda been here and not there and would maybe still be alive. I've never felt so completely lost ever. Never been at such a loss for words but still had so much to say. I know that I'm not the first to feel this pain but still I feel so completely alone.