New to this site but wanted to leave a message. I lost my husband of 13 years about a year and a half ago at in an atv accident. Being a 40 year old widow seems so weird and movie of the week, you know? My life has changed so much. I moved back to Colorado to be near family. (Which is good) but things are so lonely. Do we only get one "person?" Am I all out luck forever because I lost mine? I struggle every day. I go to work and do the things I'm supposed to do, but life has lost that zest, you know? I feel 80, not 40. I'm tired. Can anyone relate?

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Comment by Felicia on January 18, 2016 at 10:45pm

I am so sorry for your loss, Kara. And I can relate to being in your 40's and feeling 80!  As for your question, ,"Do we only get one person?"  I would have to say that depends on you. If your willing to open your heart to love, love can be found again. Of course, you can't replace one person or relationship with another, but you can find love and a wonderful relationship with the right man. Just be careful not to rush in to anything, especially while your grieving.  Or settle for the wrong guy because of loneliness.  I dearly hope that if you find, at some point, that you want to find a loving relationship again, that you meet a wonderful man. You deserve it! Sending a hug...

Comment by bluebird on January 18, 2016 at 10:23pm

I can completely relate. My husband died three years ago, literally one week after our wedding; we had been committed and monogamous for nearly 13 years.

Some of us do only get one person, if we are blessed/lucky enough to meet our soulmate.  That is the case for me.  It is apparently not the case for everyone, as there are some people who go on to marry or get involved with someone else after the death of their spouse/partner.  Only you can know which is true for you.

For me, I died when my husband died.  I have wanted to die every minute since, and I'm only 47. If you are able to find any joy in life, then you should try to do so. I hope you find peace.

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