Sue
  • Female
  • Millville, NJ
  • United States
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Sue updated their profile
Jan 18, 2018
Sue joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Jan 18, 2018
Sue and Brenda Ann are now friends
Oct 31, 2017
Brenda Ann left a comment for Sue
"So sorry to welcome you to www.onlinegriefsupport.com. I lost my dad 9 months ago to COPD/emphysema. Watching him go was a terrible experience! I tried to comfort him and spent about 20 of his last hours singing to him and playing music he loved.…"
Oct 31, 2017
Sue is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Oct 24, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
I love life and I always try to see the positive side of every bad situation but sometimes depression sets in and i need to talk about things to friends and/or family but its hard to burden them with my problems. I have anxiety issues, its harder for me to open up to someone face to face. I have lost family members and friends but the loss of my dad is the worst pain ever.
About my Loss:
The most hurtful loss in my life was when i watched as my dad pass away 6 months ago of emphysema and COPD. He passed away the day after Father’s Day, Its been tough and its affecting my relationship with everyone, I don’t really want engage in social activities anymore, i know its not healthy, my doctor said i need grief counseling but its tough for me to talk face to face, i am giving this a try as i am trying to help myself move forward instead of the what-ifs and things i keep looking back to.
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At 11:10am on October 31, 2017, Brenda Ann said…

So sorry to welcome you to www.onlinegriefsupport.com. I lost my dad 9 months ago to COPD/emphysema. Watching him go was a terrible experience! I tried to comfort him and spent about 20 of his last hours singing to him and playing music he loved. They told me he could hear me and encouraged me to keep singing and playing music. I guess it did comfort us both...

I really appreciated a brochure, WHEN SOMEONE YOU LOVE DIES. I think the advise in the brochure is very practical.

"*** we pp. 14-15 How Can I Live With My Grief? ***
Talking can be a helpful release. Following the death of all ten of his children, as well as some other personal tragedies, the ancient patriarch Job said: “My soul certainly feels a loathing toward my life. I will give vent to [Hebrew, “loose”] my concern about myself. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul!” (Job 1:2, 18, 19; 10:1) Job could no longer restrain his concern. He needed to let it loose; he had to “speak.” Similarly, the English dramatist Shakespeare wrote in Macbeth: “Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break.”
So talking about your feelings to “a true companion” who will listen patiently and sympathetically can bring a measure of relief. (Proverbs 17:17) Putting experiences and feelings into words often makes it easier to understand them and to deal with them. And if the listener is another bereaved person who has effectively dealt with his or her own loss, you may be able to glean some practical suggestions on how you can cope. When her child died, one mother explained why it helped to talk to another woman who had faced a similar loss: “To know that somebody else had gone through the same thing, had come out whole from it, and that she was still surviving and finding some sort of order in her life again was very strengthening to me.”
What if you are not comfortable talking about your feelings? Following the death of Saul and Jonathan, David composed a highly emotional dirge in which he poured out his grief. This mournful composition eventually became part of the written record of the Bible book of Second Samuel. (2 Samuel 1:17-27; 2 Chronicles 35:25) Similarly, some find it easier to express themselves in writing. One widow reported that she would write down her feelings and then days later read over what she had written. She found this a helpful release.
Whether by talking or writing, communicating your feelings can help you to release your grief. It can also help to clear up misunderstandings. A bereaved mother explains: “My husband and I heard of other couples that got divorced after losing a child, and we didn’t want that to happen to us. So any time we felt angry, wanting to blame each other, we would talk it out. I think we really grew closer together by doing that.” Thus, letting your feelings be known can help you to understand that even though you may be sharing the same loss, others may grieve differently—at their own pace and in their own way."

Let me know what you think of this advise...

Brenda

 
 
 

Latest Activity

Brenda Ann replied to mindy's discussion Feeling pretty well depressed
"Mindy, I am not a doctor but I am a student of the Bible. It seems that you are suffering from anxiety over your past. Humans including ourselves seem to filter the good things we have done and focus on the "bad". But God is the opposite.…"
4 hours ago
Pamela philipp posted a blog post

permanent grief

it has been three years and four months since i lost my mom 9-6-2015 and my husband  9-14-2015 and the overwhelming grief is unbearable also my husbands birthday is on the 20th of this month i don't know how much longer i can hold on,also i have so much added stress from people telling me i have to move on don't they understand that i may look okay on the outside but i am shattered inside i have been numb for so long i feel like i'm in a horrific nightmare nothing makes any sense any more i am…See More
4 hours ago
Brenda Ann left a comment for Lost
"Dear Lost, I've never been one who felt that money or job is most important either. There are so many things more important in life. One of those though is family. I would be lonely also if my family looked down on me and didn't talk to…"
8 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks M adams and Brett. Will wait for that time when I get over the guilt.  Starting my day with positive today. "
15 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I agree with M. I'm not one to give advice because I have not conquered those guilty feelings either. I have a feeling, and that is all I can go by, that one day we will grow tired of beating ourselves up, and that's when we will take…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, so good to hear that you can feel celebratory.  Engaging in life is important, it is something every parent wants for their child.  At the same time, I think in bereavement it’s hard to handle celebratory occasions because our…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Just returned from a small trip in India only. Whenever I celebrate, I feel guilty. "
yesterday
Shawn Hayter replied to mindy's discussion Feeling pretty well depressed
"How are you now?I know dealing with such problems is difficult. Still you need to move ahead in life. One of my colleagues was in depression and she took help from Voyance direct. Martine-Voyance was surely very helpful for her. You can also take…"
yesterday
Shawn Hayter replied to Jade Rogers's discussion Hi!
"Hello. I'm sorry to hear about your loss."
yesterday
Margaret Whitehouse left a comment for Margaret Whitehouse
"I am consumed with regret or guilt whichever you want to name it. My mom had dementia and was in extreme pain and dying week ago Sunday. My regret or guilt comes from the fact that mama took her last breath while I was talking to a good friend and…"
yesterday
Profile IconMelinda Pomana, Margaret Whitehouse, Shawn Hayter and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Brenda Ann left a comment for Lost
"So sorry to hear how lonely you are and glad you found this website. you can talk to any of us anytime you need. Hope to hear from you soon. Brenda"
Monday
Brenda Ann left a comment for JJ
"So sorry to hear of your loss, but so glad that you found this website so you can talk to people who have experienced loss and may have some practical suggestions. Blow is a list of things that will help you and your girls... HELP FOR THOSE WHO…"
Monday
Brenda Ann left a comment for JJ
"So sorry to meet you here but very happy you found this website. You can trust the folks here to listen to your feelings. They may have practical suggestions that may help you and your daughters cope. Here is a list of practical suggestions that…"
Monday
Brenda Ann left a comment for Theresa
"Dear Theresa, I am so sorry to hear you lost your mom but my heart breaks for you being unable to talk to her and say some final words. One thing I know for sure she loved you and felt your love for her. My mom and I have this kind of relationship.…"
Monday
Theresa and Brenda Ann are now friends
Monday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, as usual, I have to read your post over three times because that is almost the exact way I feel. I woke up back in hell today. Yesterday, I was feeling some comfort and how fleeting that came and went. I had a disturbing thought this morning…"
Sunday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, I did have a sign from Husband right after his death and to this day it was the only one. I am so happy for you. Morgan, I just can't believe that every time you post it mirrors my exact thoughts, maybe our Husbands are both trying to keep…"
Sunday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Havent had enough energy to respond to the latest entries from Joe but find each one to be inspirational as well as challenging me to try and dig deeper to alleviate the pain of missing my husband. Not as easy as it sounds. I too have struggled…"
Sunday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I took that pic about 10 days ago."
Saturday

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