Paul
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Latest Activity

Paul commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"29 years ago tonight I met a beautiful, young lady who would eventually be my wife and mother of our two sons.  That beautiful lady was cruelly taken from me this past year by the ruthless monster called cancer.  Kathy, I love you, I miss…"
Dec 31
Paul left a comment for Edward L
"Edward L You are correct. If you pay attention, the subtle signs from loved ones do appear."
Dec 31, 2017
Paul left a comment for Debbie brisky
"Debbie brisky, First of all, I wish to offer my deepest condolences on the loss of your husband. I lost my wife of over 26 1/2 years to breast cancer exactly 9 months today. As crazy as it sounds, what you are going through right now physically and…"
Dec 31, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Alice, You should not feel at all guilty for expressing your true feelings. You, I and the others here have been cruelly and unwillingly put in this, our worst nightmares come true, without any foolproof way to cope with it."
Dec 30, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"morgan and JenShep, Both of your comments really hit home with me. There is seemingly no way out of this relentless hell."
Dec 28, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.  To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
Dec 14, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Count me among those who are looking forward to death after losing my wife. I am absolutely not interested in anything else."
Dec 13, 2017
Paul replied to Linda Engberg's discussion Holidays Again
"Linda, I wish I could sleep thru these holidays as well. Then forever after that........"
Nov 22, 2017
Paul commented on Niomi Johnson's blog post Today would have been my husband’s birthday.
"Hello Niomi, I wish to extend my deepest sympathies on the loss of your spouse under what must be the most heart breaking circumstances imaginable. I lost my wife on March 31 of this year after a six year battle with breast cancer. I can relate to…"
Nov 9, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"bluebird, As bad as I feel now, I do not look forward to the holidays as this will be the first holiday season without my beloved wife. We also met on a New Year's Eve and I am really dreading that day. I can't see myself lasting years on…"
Oct 15, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"This seems to be an especially hard time for a lot of us lately. I feel exactly the same way as the previous 4 posters."
Oct 15, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Nancy, I believe the poem/song is on the comment wall and was submitted by stewart p on October 6 at 11:53 am"
Oct 12, 2017
Paul commented on Joy's blog post Grief Share Support Group
"Joy, Good luck with the group sessions. I hope that it goes a long way in easing your pain."
Oct 12, 2017
Paul and Michaela waldier are now friends
Oct 8, 2017
Paul left a comment for Bryan Kelly Reeves
"Michaela, you tell them that unless they have been through it themselves they should "F" off. Especially what you had to witness. My heart goes out to you."
Oct 8, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
54 years old, devastated and heartbroken.
About my Loss:
Lost Kathy, my beautiful wife of over 26 and a half years to metastatic breast cancer after 6 years of courageously fighting this dreadful disease on March 31, 2017. She was my everything and I have just about given up my will to live after losing the love of my life.
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Comment Wall (1 comment)

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At 5:00pm on October 2, 2017, Joy said…

Paul, I'm very sorry that you lost your wife, Kathy and the tremendous void her passing has left you with. I'm sending my prayers up for you and your family too! I hope you've found some comfort from the site. We all know what it is to lose someone we love dearly, so we all share a bond that way.

Thanks for responding to my post. It is very tragic what's happening. The only consolation I find in all of our losses is that our loved ones don't have to deal with any of the crap happening here in this world anymore. That doesn't help those of us left behind because we're still here dealing with it every day.

 
 
 

Latest Activity

Virginia G commented on morgan's blog post How long can I last?
"Morgan, i know you said you don’t like meds, but maybe one of the natural supplements for anxiety could lessen the meltdowns?  Just a suggestion.  I’m the opposite, don’t know why I’m not having constant breakdowns,…"
3 hours ago
Virginia G left a comment for morgan
"Morgan, thanks for the comment on my blog.  I read a few of your posts and I have the same desire to get out of here as soon as possible.  I’m only 47 and there’s no way I can wait until I’m old.  I’m afraid if…"
3 hours ago
Brett Bowman and Virginia G are now friends
4 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Brett Bowman's blog post How Far is Heaven?
"Virginia, while I don't know you, I don know this... your mom knew that you loved/love her. And there is a cold reality in all of this. No matter how hard I tried, my mom still died. There was no stopping it. It was like trying to hold back a…"
4 hours ago
Virginia G commented on Brett Bowman's blog post How Far is Heaven?
"Oatmeal, As I read your blog, I cried and cried.  It’s all too familiar and all too heartbreaking.  My Mom and I did everything together.  I always lived with both parents, but my Dad was always the quiet type that liked to do…"
5 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Crystal, there is no timeline. I understand all that you are saying. After moving out of my mom's house, I had to go back. My realtor called me back there frequently. I had little choice. It was hard. I did cry, but it was not the difference…"
6 hours ago
morgan commented on Virginia G's blog post Post traumatic stress disorder
"Virginia, We ask ourselves alot of questions when we suffer such a great loss as a loved one.  All of your questions I have asked myself over and over as I have tried to live beyond the loss of my husband.  I've not answered them…"
8 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is so hard. My sister whose husband passed away April 9th 2018 does not want to see me right now because I remind her of Mom's passing a year ago Feb 14th. She does not do it to be mean or hurtful. She is just too full of grief for her…"
12 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Sorry for the typos"
12 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Crystal. You have to do those things in memory of your mom should would want  you to do it I truly believe that I’m not saying that I don’t cry every day because I do I get in bed at night I cry when I’m sitting home alone I…"
12 hours ago
Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"In 3 months, it will be a year since my mom passed away. It feels like it was yesterday. I know I asked this before but when does it get easier to do activities that you and your mother did together? I cant bring myself to do anything that reminds…"
12 hours ago
Alice Thompson commented on Virginia G's blog post Post traumatic stress disorder
"Hello Virginia, I’m so sorry you are going through this hell. PTSD has been part of my grieving process too. I think that when we lose someone who is absolutely essential to us, our brains don’t have the ability to adjust to the changed…"
16 hours ago
Virginia G posted a blog post

Post traumatic stress disorder

I am experiencing post traumatic stress disorder.  Some days I cry a lot, others not much.  I get upset when I don’t cry.  I feel as if I should be crying all day every day because the thing I feared the most my whole life happened.  How have I not had ten heart attacks by now?  Some days I have bad flashbacks of the hospital.  Other days I feel like I can’t process what happened.  Is my mind blocking what happened to protect me from the pain?  Sometimes I feel like I’m losing my mind.  Am I…See More
23 hours ago
Marlene Kublin is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Ginger posted a blog post

Today is 2 months since I lost my only daughter to cancer and to me being reminded in some way  of what used to be is a hard one for me. She was my best friend, we talked quite often and I visited on…

Today is 2 months since I lost my only daughter to cancer and to me being reminded in some way  of what used to be is a hard one for me. She was my best friend, we talked quite often and I visited on occasion. When friends talk about their adult daughters it brings to light the realization that I once had that and I don't anymore and the tears come. I guess when I'm not reminded,I want to still think she is here,only a phone call away. Already many things have changed, we used to talk on the…See More
yesterday
Linda Engberg replied to kathy's discussion loost my spouce in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kathy, The group I belong to is "Still Mourn Husband after 5 Years" they also have other groups or you can start your own. Linda"
yesterday
lorraine knight posted a discussion

Grief that hits you at odd moments

While grocery shopping I noted a man sitting waiting for his wife as I surmised, my husband used to do wait patiently for me. It hit me hard that I no longer had anyone waiting for me.  So alone after 36 years.......See More
yesterday
AnneJ. commented on morgan's blog post How long can I last?
"Ah, Morgan. And Bluebird and Linda and Mel and Alice and all you others who let me walk with you from cave to cave during these dreadful years of an examined life. I'm so tired I can't even write lately; our old friends, where are they...…"
Wednesday
kathy replied to kathy's discussion loost my spouce in the group Lost My Spouse...
"The discussion groups, are they on this web site?"
Tuesday
Linda Engberg replied to kathy's discussion loost my spouce in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kathy, The best online support group I found is "Grief Healing Discussion Groups", my Husband has been gone 5 years and everyday is still hell, this site you on now did not help.  Linda  "
Tuesday

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