"I am finding it so hard to keep motivated. I have tons I need to do to keep afloat and try to honor the legacy of my husband and yet all I seem able to do is push myself, force myself.......constantly. Its the putting on the mask and…"
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Jonnie Russell
- Female
- Anaheim, CA
- United States
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- Photos (14)
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Jonnie Russell's Page
Profile Information
- About Me:
- I am a 43 year old Mom of two beautiful daughters. I am a Sister and a friend to many. I am a workaholic and my idea of relaxing is to start ridiculously huge projects on my home so I can absorb myself in them to avoid thinking too much. I try to stay positive and optimistic in the hopes that my brain will catch on one day to fill the void my heart is feeling most of the time lately. My family is and was as dysfunctional as most, my parents weren't perfect, but they were childhood sweethearts and truly loved eachother and we that are left try to stay as close as possible...
- About my Loss:
- I lost my Mom when I was 18 years old, my Sister 6 months later in a tragic accident. I lost a Brother 6 years ago and my Dad 2 years ago. I just recently lost another Brother to cancer, he was my friend, my confidant, my inspiration and my rock through the grief of losing so many that I loved. He was 46 years old, single, and I was his caregiver while he went to battle with his illness and this loss seems so much more profound. It's been 4 weeks and I just can't seem to stop shaking my head in disbelief.
Jonnie Russell's Photos
Groups
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Lost My Spouse...
365 members
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I miss my Mom!
729 members
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You're too young to be a…
137 members
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I love my Dad.
395 members
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Grief Counseling
116 members
Latest Activity
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."I'm now having sleeping problems lately. Go figure. I sent you a message Monty.
Comforting to see all the posting here. But, scary to see all the 5,6,7 years since.... God have mercy."
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."When your ‘life force’ is taken away from you there is no will to go on. It will be 5 years for me soon and many people think my grief has subsided as I seem to be functioning better, but as I said earlier we just become more adept…"
dream moon JO B commented on M Adams's blog post Who copes best with loss? Men or women?"do not no wen dad died i loss my way for long tim u cud say i did im f i am'thn loss folerd evn my cat i had for 16 yrs in 2016 wish she got me thru few dark tims she did
thn i gon to spirtaslt churchh fond upliftmtn i di did…"
Billy Jo Colt commented on M Adams's blog post Bad behaviour"Thank you for such a wonderful, in depth and reflective post. It sounds like your Mom really had the devotion and love she richly deserved from you. As you said. The Doctors could have done a lot more. It was if they didn't want involved unless…"
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Hello Friend's,
Big Deal, It's St. Patrick's Day. All is does to me is relieve my Husband's death. In 2013 he passed away 2 months after St. Patrick's Day. We did go out to dinner together put he was in so much pain we had…"
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Hello friends, I’m so grateful to read your honesty about this hell on earth, this unbearable grief that we have (almost) no choice but to bear. I’m sorry I don’t contribute more often. When I think of something to write, in my…"
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Have been reading comments from the past few days. Yes, grief is lonely. I'm so thankful for this group. Like Joe says, it's really difficult not having our better half here physically, just to appreciate…"
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Marita,
Yes, we all pretty much have found that grief is not a bump on the head. It is a ripping apart of a quantum soul. For me it has become an all encompassing desire to plead with the universe to take me. I do it as I have now…"
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Hi Joe,
Same as you if I am not posting anymore God has finally taken me. It will be a joyous day."
M Adams left a comment for Sue Toler"So sorry you’re going through such a grievous loss — my mother died recently as well, we were very close and I had been there helping her because she was having increasingly complex health problems over the last five years, so I feel…"
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."That you all for your kind compassion. Just plain hell today as usual. Tears at times and don't know when or what will trigger them. The only time I venture out is my daily visit to the cemetery (closest I can be to Her…"
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Hi Joe,
My heart ached for you when I read of your breakdown day. We feel your intense pain and heartache. Over time we become so adept at carrying our grief, stuffing it and hiding it. Yet so many times we become so overwhelmed by…"
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Hi Joe,
So sorry to hear about your day. My doctor was the same way with me when I had a breakdown, he could have cared less. Thank God for our friends here who truly understand."
dream moon JO B posted a videoBe thou my vision - (with lyrics)
buy an amazing testimony here https://www.amazon.com/dp/1718035071
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Joe, So sorry to hear that you are having an extraordinarily bad day... This is the life for us after we are left here in this world without the love of our life beside us."
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I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling over the physical loss of so many beloved members of your family, Hon. You were a wonderful sister to your brother. He will not forget that and God and your brother will be blessing you with many ADC signs from him to let you know that your brother is like an angel on your shoulder now. If you would like to read about the 20 common types of After-Death Communications, please visit my webpage at: http://www.christineduminiak.com/adc.html
You are in my prayers for God to heal your heart and to replace your sorrow with His joy, as well as to receive many wonderful ADC's.
Lovingly,
In Christ's Love,
Christine Duminiak
http://www.christineduminiak.com
I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling over the physical loss of so many beloved members of your family, Hon. You were a wonderful sister to your brother. He will not forget that and God and your brother will be blessing you with many ADC signs from him to let you know that your brother is like an angel on your shoulder now. If you would like to read about the 20 common types of After-Death Communications, please visit my webpage at: http://www.christineduminiak.com/adc.html
You are in my prayers for God to heal your heart and to replace your sorrow with His joy, as well as to receive many wonderful ADC's.
Lovingly,
In Christ's Love,
Christine Duminiak
http://www.christineduminiak.com