Connie miller
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  • Gastonia, NC
  • United States
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Cancer executed him!
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My only love died November 25th of 2018. He and I shared 24 years together. He believed he would survive and had so many good days with a big laugh and smiles. But, only in the 2nd month of it he…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Kathleen Jordan Mar 12.

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Kathleen Jordan replied to Connie miller's discussion Cancer executed him!
"Girl, (Don't take that wrong), I agree. but mine happened in  such a different way.   My love had health issues, but he didn't pay attention because of my cancer diagnosis. Sooo...I survived, but he didn't.  FUCK…"
Mar 12
morgan replied to Connie miller's discussion Cancer executed him!
"Connie, Just approaching one month past the loss of your beloved and you are weeping.  You are in shock.  You have lost a part of you that was embedded in you.  Cancer is an insidious disease that is heartless.  Anyone can be a…"
Dec 26, 2018
morgan and Connie miller are now friends
Dec 25, 2018
Connie miller posted a discussion

Cancer executed him!

My only love died November 25th of 2018. He and I shared 24 years together. He believed he would survive and had so many good days with a big laugh and smiles. But, only in the 2nd month of it he grabbed my arm and tears wept from his eyes he said" hunni, I'm being executed by cancer" I cryed with him it's not fair! Why can't someone please come out with a cure by now? I miss him so bad I don't know how to go on day to day. I do because I have kids, i do because it's not my turn. I will see you…See More
Dec 25, 2018
Connie miller replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Cancer Sucks -- how do I deal with this
"I lost my husband on November 25th 2018 he had stage 4 cancer I lost him within 3 months. This Christmas was so hard. I'm tired of people who haven't lost anyone that it gets easier. All I need is time. I'm so ss for everyone who lost…"
Dec 25, 2018
morgan left a comment for Connie miller
"Connie,  this is a very raw time for you and those of us here who have lost our beloved know how you are feeling.......I am sorry you had to find us but for many of us this is a lifeline.  I will hope you will find ways to cope with your…"
Dec 25, 2018
Connie miller is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Dec 25, 2018

Profile Information

About Me:
Widow recent. Age 55 live in N.C.
About my Loss:
Lost my husband on Nov 25th 2018. Cancer spent 24 years together.

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At 3:53pm on December 25, 2018, morgan said…

Connie,  this is a very raw time for you and those of us here who have lost our beloved know how you are feeling.......I am sorry you had to find us but for many of us this is a lifeline.  I will hope you will find ways to cope with your pain. Each of us use different tools and much of it is an impossible task. Take baby steps.  An hour at a time and sometimes only a minute at a time.  Do what you can.  Dont let anyone else tell you how and how long you need to grieve.  

In the past five Xmases i have hibernated and only spoken to those who try to understand me.  Those people are down to three.  It takes too much of my deleted energy to go much further.  

Read on here and you will see that losing your beloved is a lot more complicated than society will admit.  But know your grief is valid and to be expected.  

I just wanted you to know your post on a day like today did not go unnoticed.  Take the best care you can.  Come here when you need to.  We understand.

morgan

BTW, even though I am trying to be consoling I wont kid you.  This will be the hardest thing you will ever attempt to do and the fact I can even try to write something that reaches out to you is only through grueling practice.  Most often I am very fragile and need support.  I come here often and will continue to till my own dying day.  I thank everyone here for being so honest so I know I am not crazy.  

 
 
 

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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I would rather cry on the outside than on the inside. Crying on the outside is a release. I am really tired of being sad. I'm also tired of being scared. Life without my mom still seems like a scary proposition. All we can do is to continue to…"
17 minutes ago
Profile IconGeorge Makhniashvili and Amatullah joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday
Brett Bowman replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"You and I experienced something very similar. You are not an anonymous person who lost her mother. I just wish that I knew the words that would make it all better. I don't. I'm still trying to figure it out for myself. All I know is that…"
Saturday
Lynn Fisher replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you so much for your kind words.  It means a lot to me that you would take the time to bring me some peace, which you have."
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"So glad you have your daughter.  I was so close to my Dad & so many wonderful memories of time I spent with him.  It has been over four months since I lost my Mom.  I try to stay busy, but still have a lot of grief…"
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Hope everybody doing good. My daughter is growing up and keeps me busy but any day I sit and feel guilty of not serving my mother, I feel like crying. She should have enjoyed so much with her grand daughter but destiny had some other…"
Friday
Linda Engberg and M Adams are now friends
Friday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi M Adams, Thank you for your kindness. Each year on his birthday I plant a tree or bush in his memory. Yesterday I bought this plague for my garden."
Thursday
M Adams commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Linda, hope your day is uplifted by beautiful memories of celebrations you shared with Julian.  Do you have any special ritual or observance for his birthday?  Acknowledging such days is challenging for me, yet I do want to honour them.…"
Thursday
Profile IconMichele Erickson, Pamela smitherman and Shorma joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Today is Julian's birthday. I miss him so much Thanks for your post Morgan. You put into words what I have a hard time expressing."
Wednesday
morgan commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael,   Wish I had an answer to: "just how are we Widows and Widowers supposed to pick up the pieces. ? I am battling my emotions every day, the mood swings are awful.." I am not sure if I am really picking up the pieces.…"
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"JO, I read this each morning but it does not help. I just struggle through each day."
Jul 9
Michelle replied to Brett Bowman's discussion Are We Alone?
"I was in the exact situation. But I was the one who offered help. But everything I did was wrong to my sister. And I stopped because of that. Your post made me see her side of it. My mom died this year. My sister only cuses me out. She won't…"
Jul 9
M Adams commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael, just wondered if you would ever be interested in something like a book club?  A friend of mine who is a widow joined one recently and getting together with people to talk about what they’ve all read seems to be helping her, not…"
Jul 8
dream moon JO B commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"yep linda senetty of prey  i get or a versee i herd it a funrell im in nxt room waitin for u or god willget room reddy fro u  to day had bit of wobllcry to day but neededd to cry "
Jul 8
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael, After 7 years I still remain lost and I know I will be until my Husband and I are together once again. As in the Serenity Prayer, God can not grant me serenity to accept things I cannot change. I just try to live each day."
Jul 8
Michael Thompson commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
" I am at my wits end with loneliness.  Losing my wife in 2014 has taken away a certain confidence, and this happens to those left behind. Being married is much more than a ring, it is a friend, and companion, someone who knows you better…"
Jul 8
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Jul 7
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John So sorry about your Sister. I myself spent the 4th with my sweet dog Babie J. I prefer her company to humans. She does not judge me she just loves me for what I am.  I too believe that death does not do us part. We we love each other until…"
Jul 7

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