When will the ache subside?

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When will the ache subside?

A group for people who have lost loved ones with prolonged suffering. For those of us who have seen that the end is coming, and had to watch the ones we love creep toward it.

Members: 77
Latest Activity: Oct 16, 2017

Discussion Forum

It still aches, but I am able to cope with it better. 5 Replies

I have cried my eyes out for a year and a few months since my adorable husband passed away.  We were married 44 years, and it was our second marraige and we were as close as any two could possibly…Continue

Started by Georgia Garrison. Last reply by kathleen akin Aug 19, 2016.

Intros... 14 Replies

Who are you? Why are you here? Tell me about yourself.

Started by Desiree. Last reply by Tracey Bottoms Jan 29, 2012.

Intro 3 Replies

My name is Julie, I lost my sweet dad to Colon cancer feb 2005 and my dearest mom in august 2009 one day shy of her 68th bday.  I have no family to speak of, I have half siblings but we only know…Continue

Started by Julie Dolsey-Weiss. Last reply by Sue Waxman Jul 24, 2011.

Waking up from dreaming of my hubby today 2 Replies

today i woke up froma dream about jason and i of course bawled my eyes out when i woke up. dreaming of him is always so hard for me. even i don't see his face its like hes all up inside my head and…Continue

Started by roxydee. Last reply by roxydee Mar 15, 2011.

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Comment by michael sandoval on January 2, 2011 at 5:47pm
Hi All. The last few days, the entire holiday season has been really horrible. The new year has not been happy and happiness is something I cannot remember very well. I really hope that this heavy sadness and depression will subside soon. It's been over a year for me since I lost my Denise and sometimes I feel like it is just too much for me.
Comment by Shawna Shuler on December 22, 2010 at 8:11pm
Hi Im Shawn,  I recently lost my fiance 11-13-10 he suffered a year long battle with lung cancer he was diagnosed in 12-09 he was at stage 3 b he did his chemo and radiation and we thought he was getting better.  His doctors were optomistic but 6 months later it traveled to his brain they gave him 2 years.  He was in and out of the hospital 3 or 4 x a month and when he was home I did my best to take care of him.  About 6 months after that we found it had traveled to his spine as well once that was diagnosed he deteriorated so fast.  He went into a coma the morning of 11-13-10 and I was told he would stay that way but he might rally one last time...he died in our home with our two young sons awake at 8:15pm that night.  I dont know how to deal with all this right now i just feel numb and like Im in a daze but yet Im angry and I just dont know just wish I could turn back time and have him back he was my best friend, my soul mate, my childrens father, my everything
Comment by michael sandoval on December 22, 2010 at 6:46pm
Denise and I met in April 08 and by June of 08 we were living together and wanting to get married.  we celebrated Christmas together and planned our trip to India.  She felt sick just before we left for India, was sick for most of the three weeks we were in India.  We we came back she was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and had surgery on 21 may 09.  Complications set in and after just one Chemo therapy session, she passed away on 21sept09.  I haven't been the same since.  And sometimes i feel like I am getting worse.
Comment by Tabatha K. on August 4, 2010 at 11:33pm
Hello! I lost my Pops almost 10 mths ago after a battle w/ liver cancer. We found out in July & he passed away in October ( on my niece's birthday). I thought the ache was supposed to ease over time??!! The hole in my chest continues to ravage me & at the oddest times.
Comment by K on July 24, 2010 at 4:46am
My name is Kimberly. I'm 24 years old and living in the beautiful Bay Area of California. I'm getting married September 12, 2010 to my best friend, my other half, and for that, I am extremely exciting. Photography is my passion and after September, I am starting my own freelance company. I'm extremely exciting for that, too.


I'm on Online Grief Support because February 12, 2010, I lost my grandfather after a long and painful illness. His end was not a pleasant one and though I will never regret being by his side during his pain, it DID have a profound affect on me. It has been very difficult, to say the least. He was my friend, my mentor, my guide in life, my strength, a father-figure, and my angel. I'm trying to learn how to live with the loss of him.

So...that's me.
Comment by roxydee on July 21, 2010 at 2:12pm
My best friend and husband passed away 1.29.09. He died of hepatitis c end of life liver damage officially but possibly it was because his heart was broken. It's hard to put into words the horrific journey that started 2/29/08, with a pitstop from 12/9/08 and ended 1/29/09. I flew out to pick up my husband from a hospital in Michigan to home in California...Having him incarcerated 10 months unfairly only to return home to die - words can't express how angry and hurt i feel. Our wedding anniversary was on Monday, 7.19.10 and I don't know how to bear this aching that's dragging me downward again into a grief spiral. I am so angry and hurt. But it doesn't seem to end. This pain is as fresh as it was 1/29/09 and doesn't skip a beat...nor has it diminished. I still hate the heavens for taking him away, for eclipsing my joy and for ripping away the source of the most beautiful love I've ever known.
Comment by Lilly pizer on April 20, 2010 at 6:57pm
I lost my husband 11 years ago, my daughter was 8months old at the time. He had cancer and despite treatments, surgery, etc. He was considered terminal and ended up taking his life. Its been hard to be a single mom, its been hard to know that he made a choice to leave us, In my heart I believed he would get better, I have blamed God, I have blamed myself for not seeing the signs that were so obviosly present, but somehow I have been able to keep on plugging through this life... Of course i have a wonderful daughter that has been my main purpose for everything that I have accomplished after he died. I recently lost my best friend to ovarian cancer. Which has taken me back to that very lonely dark place and that is why I am here. I think I have a fear of connecting with people...because you just never know when they are going to leave you. I don't think the ache ever subsides its always there, you just dont notice it as much. Kind of like when you walk into a room that has some smelly garbage in it... you notice it right away, but the longer you are in the room the less you notice it. I know that is a weird analogy.... Besides my daughter, my life is pretty empty and I am just feeling like there is not much to look forward to. I started thinking that she is going to be 12 soon and when I really stop and think I have about 6 years with her and then she will be off to college, getting married, etc and I've taken a real deep look at my life and wonder what am I going to do with myself when she is gone... I don't have a life without her. That is really sad. Any thoughts?
Comment by Jodi Cole on March 7, 2010 at 12:22pm
Hi I'm Jodi and I'm here because I lost my mom who was my best friend six weeks ago tomorrow. She had lung cancer and the doctors told us that she only had probably 3 months to live and that's approximately what she lived. We watched her slowly day by day get a little worse until the end came and now that she's gone I just miss her so much and it seems to be getting worse as the time goes on.
 

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Latest Activity

joe kelly replied to Jade Rogers's discussion Hi!
"Dear Jade, I wish I had some advice for you because when I sign in, I notice that you often sign in I guess to check if anything new has been posted.  Being lonely after losing your Love after so many years together is a major part of all who…"
12 hours ago
Holly Baldwin is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
12 hours ago
Dennis C. and Virginia G are now friends
22 hours ago
Virginia G replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Defeated
"I feel the same.  The website doesn’t help because we aren’t talking and around people in person.  That isn’t even enough when people are willing to talk and most don’t have time for me."
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"You are right. I became conditioned with my mom. Every health crisis that my mom would have was traumatic for me. And then there would be that ray of light. I would have mom safe at home once again. I developed some false hope. But as time passed…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Baby steps is such a good metaphor — I think when we’ve been traumatized by terrible loss, many of us lose our resilience, and basically have to baby ourselves, setting very tiny goals and challenges, slowly working our way forward.…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, it's hard for me to be positive about anything. I always feel like something bad is right around the corner. That's because every time I thought mom was safe and had cleared another hurdle, something else would go wrong. It's…"
Saturday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It's been a little bit since I shared but it seems like I'm just stuck, out of sync with everything included myself in a way.  It's been like one long endless day.  I don't know how to explain it even.  I'm…"
Saturday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Monty, For some of us, we will always remain out of sync with the rest of world. We, like myself. live in our own universe."
Saturday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett you are right that is the "dark" side, it scares me too That is so great about the phone call from the directors at the center, that must have made you feel like a million bucks.   You are making a positive impact, I know…"
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I actually looked up the EquoVox. I couldn't find an English link for it. I'll keep looking. I'm just really curious how it works. And I want you to make your own decisions. I just want you to be happy."
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, I'm half Catholic, and Theresa is 100% Catholic. This is a huge part of Catholicism. Ouiji boards just scare the crap out of me. I listened to a lecture series from a Vatican exorcists. There was a question and answer period. Someone asked…"
Saturday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, it gives me such a lift to hear about your new gig — sounds perfect! Lucky kids too, great when they can connect with an adult who also makes them laugh.   Your comment re the spirit world app that Avi came across brought back a…"
Friday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, things like that scare the crap out of me. I mean, how do you know that you are actually communicating with your mom, and not something bad? I believe that you may open yourself to something that may attach itself to you. That's just…"
Friday
Brenda Ann left a comment for Lisa
"Dear Lisa, I send you my heartfelt condolences as well as a welcome to our website. It is a safe place to come and talk or vent about your loss. Talking is very helpful in sorting out how to move forward. I would like to share a paragraph from what…"
Friday
P updated their profile
Friday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"No we should not, God is the only communicator Avi, you are right. We should not disturb the deceased, they are in peace, it is us who are not in peace. I still struggle everyday, I just have come to recognize that this is my new life.  "
Friday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Monty, I m sure everyone on our forum had a very bad day. I just kept myself very busy all. Since I live in Florida and it is in the 70's I worked outside all day long. I feel Julian is with when I am outside. He knew I just loved the outdoors…"
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Friends,  Few days back I came to know an app EquoVox which can help you communicate with your loved ones who are deceased. It seems be fake to me but have seen some videos on you tube people claiming its real. Did anybody on this group…"
Friday
Profile IconValerie Groh, diane, Lisa and 6 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday

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