Losing a spouse and dating again

Information

Losing a spouse and dating again

I lost my spouse 16 months ago. Have gotten into a new relationship but he lets me grieve openly. I have a2 year old daughter. Also I am 26

Members: 17
Latest Activity: Aug 13, 2018

Discussion Forum

This group does not have any discussions yet.

Comment Wall

Comment

You need to be a member of Losing a spouse and dating again to add comments!

Comment by kathleen akin on January 11, 2017 at 3:10pm

For me...I can tell you right now it would depend on what spouse passed away. I'm sure this sounds bad, but if it had been my first spouse it would have been a short grieving period. I will leave it to the imagination as to why that would be

But losing Rocky was a different thing. I'd found him late in life, and I knew we would not have a 50 year wedding anniversary, but it was very hard to let him go. Even knowing he was sick and in pain and wanted to go. So I think it's going to be a while. I think it would be a different time period for everyone and it might be due to reasons we know nothing about.

You are right about those who have not gone through it are the ones who seem to know just exact time frame to expect. Ugh!

Comment by Lynn on June 2, 2015 at 7:51pm

I lost my husband 4yrs ago and there is not a day that goes by that he is not on my mind or in my heart. I started dating an old flame of mine and things seemed to be going great! we have known each other forever so we were already friends. We have hit a really rough patch for the second time and I am afraid that I have lost him too... I know it was hard for me to completely commit my whole heart to him as I still love my husband and I felt guilty at times for being with another man.. I am sure many of you can relate to that. I know he loves me with all his heart and I know that I was looking forward to having a future with him but his actions as of late do not match his words and there are so many complications. I don't know what to do and I feel like I am drowning and I have nothing or no one to help me through any of this.

I'm holding onto life by my fingertips....

Comment by Cathie Mac on March 9, 2015 at 7:48pm

I started dating, and although its weird, its not too difficult. Dating doesn't mean you have to forget your spouse.  A guy I have dated for a little while told me he isn't looking to replace my husband, but would like a place along side him in my heart. I thought that was a good way to look at it, even though I don't think we would make a good marriage, we are friends.

Comment by Lost & Alone on March 9, 2015 at 12:31am

My heart lightens for all of you I guess it is as they say time heals all and marches on... I just hope one day my heart will move on, sounds like you are all in a better place than me...

God Bless You

Good luck to you ... I hope you find the equilivent to what you had or as close as you can get.

Comment by Karen T. on March 1, 2015 at 9:15pm

Sashelle-

Thank you. Yeah I know that I will never get over my husband and he will always have his own special place in my heart. But everyone talks about how they understand how I will eventually start dating again and that's no big deal (my mother-in-law said this to me just 1 month after it happened and the way she said it it same out more like go start dating now and that's ok lol). My husband at a few points (he had an illness but got over ir unexpectadly so only had to be God's help) told me that since we were expecting him to pass first that he wants me not to have any down time in finding my next first date. So basically I know he has a huge chunk of my heart but I do expect that at some point in my future (maybe soon maybe far) there will be some room for another.

Comment by Sashelle on February 28, 2015 at 9:28pm
I don't know if there is a right time per se! I lost my husband in 03 and I can get choked up looking at pictures or feeling sorry for myself when my girlfriends are vacationing with their spouses or what not. I only say that to reaffirm that I have NEVER gotten over losing Chris! I don't know if I want to. I love being his Mrs. to this day.

But a year exactly after he passed, I met a guy at a cookout. My God-Daughter asked me if he was my type. I took a closer look and thought...not bad! He was definitely checking me out and it felt good to have someone look at me without having that "poor little widow" look. Here there was a nice looking man looking at me who had no idea that he should be feeling sorry for me! Well, this guy cracked me up from the first date! I honestly hadn't laughed in over a year and it felt amazing. That's when I knew it was okay to date again.
Comment by Karen T. on February 28, 2015 at 8:07pm

I know everyone says that you will know when the right time comes to start dating again, but I just feel conflicted. My heart is definately with my husband as I know it always will be, I cry sometimes very heavily just speaking or thinking about him- even just 2 days ago someone made a comment about how I had spoken about my husband and they could tell how much we were one and I just broke out in sobs. But then today as I am shopping I notice a few good looking guys around and then there was one that definately looked back at me twice and we both smiled the last time. So I mean really how do you know? Does time actually really matter? What feeling(s) am I looking for that could help me decide how and when to move on?

Comment by Lost & Alone on January 24, 2015 at 2:45am

I was wondering how things are going as well, I do not know if I am going to be ready to date yet... I still have a lot of questions for the universe and I do not know if I am strong enough to move on yet.. I was just wondering if you could tell me what led you to dating again? If that is not to personal

God Bless

Comment by Cathie Mac on April 25, 2014 at 9:48pm

I see that this post is almost a year old....how are things going?  I am trying to get back into the dating.

 

Members (16)

 
 
 

Groups

Latest Activity

Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Danny. Surviving is art which we all need to practice. Today I met a friend whose father is witnessing the similar illness as my mother i.e. late stage cancer. He is also going through the same emotional turmoil as I went in 2018. After this…"
14 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Danny. I hear you.  December will be 4 years "
14 hours ago
Danny replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Great reply Sandra"
15 hours ago
Danny updated their profile
15 hours ago
Danny commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Its been 5 years and here I am back on the site. Surviving and functioning but just about. "
15 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Wonderful Avi!!!  "
15 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Amen, Avi."
19 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks all. This group is my extended family. "
20 hours ago
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, that is so lovely to hear — best wishes to her and your family!"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"That's wonderful, Avi. Congratulations. And I wish you another 100 years with her."
yesterday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am so happy for you & your family.  I am glad your daughter had a great birthday!  That first birthday is always special.  Take care, "
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Friends, my daughter's first bday celebration went great. She is now 1 year old and motivating force for my dad to live. My dad is able to laugh and enjoy life because of his grand daughter. Even I feel motivated to live so that I…"
yesterday
Stephanie Berndt is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
Judy Pugh left a comment for Kevin's Mom
"You are still Kevin’s mom, and you always will be. NOTHING, not even death, can change that. I don’t know what your beliefs are, and I’m not trying to shove my beliefs onto you. I just want you to know that I truly believe this is…"
Aug 10
Connie K commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Teresa D. the line is "Mama  don't you cry for me, I'm sailing in eternity..." Makes me feel emotional and happy that it resonates with you and that you remember it. <3"
Aug 9
Connie K commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Kevin's mom I am so terribly sorry for your devastating loss. I lost my only child as well - Daniel - at age 17. That was 6 and a half years ago. I can't tell you how i made it through, but I have, one day at a time sometimes one minute at…"
Aug 9
Gale Brunault commented on Gale Brunault's group Loss of an Only Child
"I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your precious son. Why do bad things happen to good people? We may never find the answers.......please know that you are not alone. "
Aug 9
Holycow updated their profile
Aug 9
Kevin's Mom commented on Gale Brunault's group Loss of an Only Child
"I lost my 32 yr old son, my only child, on July 10 2019. He was killed in a motorcycle accident. My heart is shattered and my life will never be the same. This is life's most cruel event."
Aug 9
Kevin's Mom joined Gale Brunault's group
Thumbnail

Loss of an Only Child

As bereaved parents we must deal with unique issues that accompany losing an only child. See More
Aug 9

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service