Has a year really gone by that fast? I'm sitting outside, the sun is out and TV's weather beutiful. Only I sit alone. Annette and I sat next to each other every day and talked about how the birds chirp led and squirrels could race past us. Arrying thief munchies to their nests.
All that is gone. I sit alone, my breathing today is at it's worse. Even when we were obese we suffered together. It made us appreciate life so much more. Now the pain of grief and body makes life beyond unfulfilling. There's no one to speak to , hold hands with. Kiss, caress. Guilt's my companion now. The guilt of not having done enough to save her. I know deep in my heart I could have. My failure as a husband, I suppose will Haunt me until my dying days. And when I'm reunited with Annette she'll say to me "There was nothing to forgive, you were a great husband, it's time to go now, let's watch the sky and hold hands."
"Bluebell, my thoughts and prayers are with you. My brother called me the other day and he said are you ok? There is a twenty year age difference between us, so we are not that close and he lives five hours away. I said to him, yes I though you would…"
"Another bad day. I was shopping for Christmas cards and gift bags when without warning, I broke down in tears at the register. Thank goodness the cashier was a sensitive caring person and did not just blow me off. She said "Your Mom will always…"
"Paul, Each of us have memories of a time and day of the death of our beloved. Mine just happened to come at a time of the year when normally the excesses of celebrating kick into high gear. Not better not worse than anyone else's…"
"My friend just lost her husband before Thanksgiving. I'm trying to reach out to her, because I know how she feels, but she does not seem to want to respond. She's keeping very busy! I feel bad for her, but I guess…"
"Hi Dawn, I saw your posts and wanted to introduce myself. I'm also in Canada, in Ontario. I lost my husband suddenly in 2015. He had cancer but had been given 3 to 5 years and was gone in 8 weeks. If you'd like to…"
As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.
To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
"Paul, In particular this time of the year everyone who hasn't lost their love is celebrating. I used to be one of them. Then one day a long time ago, I took my sick husband to the hospital Xmas Eve day and found out the day after…"