I can't believe she is really gone...that this just isn't true...that I'll never see my girl ever again...I loved her so much..for all my life it was "us"...We had 2 wonderful boys that I know miss their mom terribly ...She loved them with all her heart ... I find myself crying every day...me..who everyone considers a strong guy..crying when I see a dress hanging in the closet she''ll never wear again..a bike in the garage that she loved to ride..never again...pictures of us skiing, laughing, smiling ...I cry for those good times...We looked so happy...we were happy...she loved me I know...and I will never..never ever believe there can be a God so cruel to have allowed her to suffer so much these past several months with this awful cancer that she battled so valiantly and then let it take her life. I would say to all just hold and love your cherished ones every moment you can...do anything and everything you can while you are together so you can say that you didn't waste a precious moment...because you never know when it all will end...My life will never be the same without her but I know she would want me to be happy again...But right now, I can't even imagine it... 

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Comment by Pamela Manning on October 25, 2012 at 9:27am
Welcome Don, Iam so sorry for your loss. I recently lost my husband to cancer. We moved to Florida to enjoy the good life sorta speak. 3 weeks later my husband got sick and was taken to The emergency room in Kissimmee Florida only to find out he had lung cancer with mets to the brain. He passed 3 months ago. What a journey we had. We moved here the end of march and got a horrible diagnosis April 6. He passed July 18th. I cry daily and have such an empty feeling. I do know how you feel. One of the things that I do have to hang on to is something that was said to me by a physician. I will share it with you.... Mr. Manning she said, "you are going to die, maybe from the cancer or a complication from treatments but you are going to die, Now the reason you are going to die is because the day you were born your book was written. The reason anyone dies is because you are being called home but the cause is cancer. There has to be a cause of death. Very few people die of natural causes." That in itself made me feel better knowing that my husband's book was written and he was being held in Gods arms. The day he passes it flew out the window but now that I have had some time to think about it I do however have comfort knowing that he is walking in heaven looking down on me. Does it still hurt? Yes.

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