Katherine Ellis's Blog (8)

OUR ADOPTED SON IS DEAD TODAY

WE HAVE HAD A CRISIS HERE. JAMES' FRIEND AND OUR ADOPTED SON CHRIS WERE DRINKING IN THE GARAGE. THEY HAD BEEN DRINKING FOR A LONG TIME TODAY. WHEN I LEFT AROUND 1:30 TO GET MY HAIR DONE CHRIS ASKED ME TO BUY HIM A PACK OF CIGARETTES AND I SAID YES. WHEN I GOT HOME AROUND 4:30 JAMES WAS PAST OUT ON THE COUCH AND CHRIS HAS FALLEN ONTO THE FLOOR. I DIDN'T THINK MUCH ABOUT IT. ROGER CAME HOME A FEW MINUTES AFTER I DID AND TRIED TO GET CHRIS ONTO THE COUCH. CHRIS WAS DEAD. WE TRIED TO DO CPR ON HIM… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on July 24, 2009 at 8:29pm — 1 Comment

Another worry

Worried tonight. Husband went to specialist and news isn’t great. Doctor thinks he has a fatty liver. They are doing tons of blood work to find out why but doctor mentioned several reasons and none of them good. He is also scheduled for a liver biopsy to see how far the disease has progressed. Will I end up losing him like we did our daughter? Did the cancer come back? God how scared I am.

Added by Katherine Ellis on July 16, 2009 at 2:17am — 1 Comment

Angel Date

Nine years ago the clock stopped. The sun quit shining. The world stopped turning. How could it be nine years ago when it seems like yesterday? I can still see her lying on the ground, people so many people working on her. Then nothing. They said she was gone. Gone where I thought. I held her in my arms, screaming “my baby, my baby” over and over in my mind, in the air. God how could you take her? She wasn’t done. She had so much more work to do here. I need her. We need her. Am I having a… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on June 8, 2009 at 1:42am — No Comments

Irene's Birthday

Will there be Birthday cake and presents in heaven? Will all the angels sing Irene happy birthday? On the day she was born it was sunny, clear and warm. The first time I held her I thought my heart would break from joy. This tiny bundle, so fragile was mine. Thank you God.

As the years pasted she grew into this amazing intelligent, beautiful woman, who could make me laugh when no one else could. Her blue eyes and long blond hair lit up a room as she entered. We became more than Mother and… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on May 18, 2009 at 5:58am — 2 Comments

One Week From Today - May 11th

The sun will be coming up soon. As yet I've not gone to bed. What is the use when I can't sleep. The last time I went to the doctor he gave me something to help with that, but so far it hasn't done a thing. So most nights find me in front of my computer, a lot of times just staring into space.

One week from today and it will be Irene's 35th birthday. I wonder what she would look like. Would the tiny lines around her eyes be starting to show? Would she still have that long, long hair or… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on May 12, 2009 at 5:34am — 2 Comments

Mother's Day

What a bitter sweet day it is today. I'm trying to be happy for those still here by me, but my heart is heavy because my daughter, Irene is not here. What I wouldn't give to see her smile, hear her laughter just once more. Feel her arms around me for one more hugs. For all of us this is a hard day. I am praying for everyone as we walk through this day. I know that I am not alone. I have all of you. God bless you all and we shall make it through today, for we are all holding hearts and hands,

Added by Katherine Ellis on May 10, 2009 at 10:37am — 1 Comment

Thank you for caring

I couldn't beleive the support that I have recieved so far when I logged on today. In the death of our daughter I keep telling myself that we were lucky to have such a special relationship with her from the time she was young until the she was taken away from us. But that doesn't really help. The hole that is left in my heart is much to large to heal. I have more bad days than good. My family say I should get over it. Are they right? It has been almost 8 years now. The support I received here… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on April 26, 2009 at 5:54pm — 2 Comments

My Daughter

Greetings Everyone,

I have come here hoping to find some peace. I not only lost a daughter, but I lost my best friend. Irene was 27 year and 29 days old when she died in front of us that day. Her anniversary is coming up in June but her birthday was in May so this time of year gets hard for me. On top of that my husband had cancer and we're just getting through that. I'm feeling so alone and drepressed so I thought I'd like to reach out and see what happens. This will be the 8th year… Continue

Added by Katherine Ellis on April 26, 2009 at 2:10am — 9 Comments

Groups

Latest Activity

Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Katherine, Everybody on this group will understand your pain and there are no concrete steps that you can take to relax your grief. Take small steps and you will be able to find a way forward. Your mother will always want you to be happy and…"
13 minutes ago
dream moon JO B commented on dream moon JO B's group dreams
"had a vistt off dad in dream i did "
13 hours ago
Ronald Gordon updated their profile
22 hours ago
Sue M commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Hello Ammy  thank you for your message, and yes I understand at some point we all need to step back and allow ourselves to move further down our path and that constant reminders can harm us. I have felt this way at times too. Big hug to you…"
yesterday
Profile IconConnie ricke and rebecca wrobel joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Ammy commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Hello Sue M & Shirelle, I am sorry for your loss.  I know the pain well.  And like Sue said, it does get "less sharp".  I don't think it ever goes away but definitely less intense.We lost our son nine and a half…"
yesterday
Sue M commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"im sorry Shirelle, the computer changed your name to Shirley. "
Monday
Sue M commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Hello Shirley, im so sorry for you and your family. I know how deep, sharp, and unimaginable this pain is. I know too how it breaks you up and your world too. It was like looking through a broken kaleidoscope for me. Nothing seemed whole, I trusted…"
Monday
rebecca wrobel joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Monday
Shirelle commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"My son came home for 3 month then died"
Monday
Shirelle commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"My son pass away Nov 25 at 936am my life has not been the same I really feel lost , empty nothing to live for but I have 3 other kids I love them more than anything I just don't know what to do please can someone help me"
Monday
Shirelle joined Kar's group
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Missing my Son or Daughter

For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.See More
Sunday
Billy Jo Colt left a comment for Miriam Holmes
"Hi Miriam, You have my deepest admiration and empathy. I don't have any family left to speak of. For years there was no one to talk to about my daily life. Although I found it difficult to be open with people and preferred to help them rather…"
Saturday
M Adams commented on Miriam Holmes's blog post Healing Repetition
"Miriam, thanks for what you’ve said here, think it will be helpful to many other people here and I hope writing it down will help you as well.  What you say about the way you miss your uncle, the loss of rituals and of his expressions of…"
Saturday
Shirelle posted a status
"It will be 2 months since my son pass I'm feel do lost I'm don't want to work but have bills I don't want to talk to anyone just want to cry"
Friday
Miriam Holmes posted a blog post

Healing Repetition

An uncle in our family committed suicide.  For five years his wife, Aunt Alice, said the same things over and over again to anyone who would listen.  We are a loving family, so we listened and said the same hopefully comforting things back to her again and again.  And after five years she was done and could move on.  I hope it doesn't take five years, but I need to talk about my Uncle Jim and my cousin Paul and probably repeat myself a lot. It took a long time to develop my relationship with…See More
Friday
Katherine A Pericas Geersten commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi everyone, My name is Katherine.  I am learning how to deal with the loss of my mom, she passed away two months ago.My mom was never my best friend, but she was so much more. She made me the person that I am today and living without her has…"
Friday
Katherine A Pericas Geersten joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
Friday
Katherine A Pericas Geersten posted a discussion

Hello, a little bit about me.

Two months ago, my mom committed suicide. As of now, this has to be one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with in my life. I hope that through this forum I may be able to just reach out to someone who can kind of understand what my situation is like.My friends try to talk to me (and I do reach out to them) but I feel that the situation I am in is a really heavy thing to talk about (basically I don't want to rope my friends into my troubles, nor do I want to be a burden to them). I talk to…See More
Friday
Profile IconRonald Gordon and Dona Fiedler joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday

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