Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Don't grieve alone.
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susan Paull
- Female
- Santa Cruz, CA
- United States
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susan Paull's Page
Latest Activity
As of June 6th my Papa has been gone for 6 months. I have little patience with people; I have always had a good filter between my brain and my mouth and now it is a straight shot between what I think and what I say. On the one hand, it is good for s…
Yesterday ended the second week without my Papa. I'm supposed to go to my Mom's house to pick photos for the memorial. I can't sleep; I lay here dreading the thought of letting him go, saying goodbye again. I can't decide if I need more time or if i…
that is beutifal. peacful makes you realize how short our lives really are even though they seem way to long when you feel so sad everyday. just wanna get it over with i feel wish i was 80. Use to worry so about getting older about death not anymore…
The one person in my life that I could say anything to is gone; it makes me realize it is time to let more people in, to let more love in my life. Perhaps it's time to let the people in my life take more responsibility for our relationships as well.…
Thank you Laura; my heart goes out to you.
Susan, you say so beautifully what I have been feeling for the last 6 1/2 months...what is to be done with all the love and affection we shared with our loved ones who have passed? This energy does not dissipate or transfer...it is always there boun…
For me, I am reminded of the season in some way, for example, A sign in the market about ordering your turkey. I stop and think, "Why didn't they take that sign down. The holidays are over... Oh, wait Christmas hasn't happened yet!" The spirit is no…
For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Profile Information
- About Me:
- I am taking things one day at a time.
- About my Loss:
- I lost my father a week ago to cancer- my best friend.
Susan Paull's Blog
6 month marker
As of June 6th my Papa has been gone for 6 months. I have little patience with people; I have always had a good filter between my brain and my mouth and now it is a straight shot between what I think and what I say. On the one hand, it is good for setting boundaries when necessary, on the other, I have been too snappy. The pain is like a searing presence. It's like going about my day without noticing the mountain in the middle of the path until I run into it again.
Posted on June 29, 2010 at 8:46am —
Second week
Yesterday ended the second week without my Papa. I'm supposed to go to my Mom's house to pick photos for the memorial. I can't sleep; I lay here dreading the thought of letting him go, saying goodbye again. I can't decide if I need more time or if it will be this hard no matter when I look at his pictures.
Posted on December 20, 2009 at 3:24am —
Silence in the woods
I live in the redwoods and just took my dogs for a walk. There is a different kind of silence in the woods; the green quiet of mossy age. The trees have been there since before we were ever a hope. That they will be there long after I am gone puts things into a different perspective for awhile. The silence at home is full of the inside of my thoughts.
Posted on December 18, 2009 at 1:42pm — 1 Comment
hollow ache
I spend my days with a hollow ache through the center of my body and a restlessness that shifts and paces inside me. I miss my father; I miss the gentle hum of his spirit, his wry sense of humor, his clean and clear memory of the details of my life.
It took us some time to develop that relationship. After watching each other from a distance (living in the same home) during my childhood, he stepped forward to be more active in my life when I was in my early twenties. He wrote me a poem that spoke… Continue
It took us some time to develop that relationship. After watching each other from a distance (living in the same home) during my childhood, he stepped forward to be more active in my life when I was in my early twenties. He wrote me a poem that spoke… Continue
Posted on December 18, 2009 at 12:30pm —
Comment Wall (1 comment)
- At 12:11am on December 17, 2009, Michael A. Spudich gave susan Paull a gift…
Groups
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Traumatic, Sudden Loss
126 members
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I love my Dad.
106 members
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Losing Someone to Cancer
90 members
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I miss my Mom!
81 members
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Missing my Son or Daug…
79 members
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Multiple Losses Group
51 members
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I Miss My Parent(s)
37 members
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Tattoo Memorial
36 members
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Lost Without My Mom
29 members
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mY sOuLmAtE, mY bEsTfRiE…
25 members
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Caylee Marie Anthony
19 members
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for loved ones who have…
19 members
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Orphaned Adults
16 members
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Losing a Sister
15 members
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When will the ache subsi…
10 members
Latest Activity
If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
@Mel &@Courtney - thx for the support. It helps coming here & reading posts by you all & others. It helps to know that I am not alone!
My brother died March 9, 2010. He was a big NASCAR fan. One Sunday a few weeks after he died, I was in bed and had been dozing off and on. The TV was on a channel that plays "whodunit" shows all day. I got up and went in to my office for a little wh…
My daughter, Lyndsey died on July 18, 2010 from injuries suffered in a motorcycle accident. She was 27 years old and left behind two children. In a blink of an eye, our world was turned upside down. I'm thankful that it was fast and she didn't linge…
For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.
@Mel YOur such an insperation when I come and read your posts...You have made it easy on me to have the fatih I do. I know that in time things will get better.....I am so glad that your doing good...and that you are talking to your dad in your own l…
Jan --
Thank you for your words....I try everyday to forgive myself and I also tell myself not to feel guilty, but it goes back to "I should of been there".
I sometimes think I need to find a griefing place here in town where I can sit down with p…
If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
Back in October 2009, my 21 yr old was riding his friend's motorcycle down a residential street when he was rammed into another car. Thank God the occupants of that car were not seriously hurt but unfortunately, my son sustained a massive brain in…
Greetings Amanda. Some people just dont realize how insensitive there comments are. I dont think they delibrately want to hurt us, they dont think before they speak. He who feels it, knows it. I had a parent from one of my children's class ask me if…
sorry to hear about your mom--and i tried reaching out to fred's friends but they are all couples now and dont want me around--especially since i am so sad and depressed all the time
I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce.
Many of us have lost more than one person or event.
Come share!
Useful Links
How to Write an Obituary How to Write a Eulogy Find A Grave Twinless Twins Dead or Alive Hospice My Loving Tribute Writing through Cancer
Healing Grief Support
One year of writing and healing at a glance
View my page on Hospice Community Forum Your donations benefit the entire community.
Visit My Loving Tribute
Healing Grief Support
One year of writing and healing at a glance
View my page on Hospice Community Forum Your donations benefit the entire community.
Visit My Loving Tribute
FLOWER.COM - leading online florist since 1996
Books
To One In Sorrow
Let me come in where you are weeping, friend,
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.
-Grace Noll Crowell
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.
-Grace Noll Crowell
The Light Beyond
The Gift That Freed Me To Give
A significant lesson for me has been understanding and accepting that our greatest gains often come through experiences in our lives that may be extremely painful. My father, Raphel Orval Beason, died less than four months before I was born at the age of 19 in an explosion at the Port Chicago U.S. Navy arsenal near Oakland, Calif. He was among 320 men killed on July 17, 1944, when two merchant ships blew next to...The loss of a son
Mother's Day will always be the anniversary of my son's death, no matter what date it falls on. May 9, 2010, the day I lost a piece of my heart. I have vivid memories of that day but they are brief glimpses only. He called that morning to tell me Happy Mother's Day Mom! I love you! I remember being 250 miles away from my home, my other child and my family. I don't know...Try tapping, it works wonders...
I don't often recommend specific methods to help with grief. But the self-help method I'm going to tell you about - EFT or Emotional Freedom Techniques - is well worth making an exception for. Basically, it involves tapping on the acupuncture points to tap into your body's own energy and healing power. If you think that sounds a little far-fetched and woo-woo, so did I. In fact, I starting doing EFT on myself for chronic...Daughter of Suicide
It has been 22 and a half years since my mother’s suicide in October 1987. I look at that number – 22 – and it startles me. It’s hard to believe that I have lived more of my life without my mother, than with her. During those first 10 years after her death I carried the heavy load of her suicide every waking moment. I struggled with my own depression and feelings of abandonment and...8 practical ways to help a grieving family
When a friend or family member experiences the death of a loved one, we quickly offer our condolences and help. Listed here are eight practical suggestions for helping a friend or family member that has just suffered a loss. 1. Offer to answer the telephone or answer emails at the family's home. Telephone calls and email can take up a considerable amount of time. Take messages and give information to friends and family. 2. Volunteer...Badge
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