Melissa Erlandson
  • Female
  • Tualatin, OR
  • United States

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About Me:
I am 32 years old, I have three children and one on the way. I am a live in care giver for a 61 year old lady.
About my Loss:
my most recent loss was the unexpected death of my husband on December 23 2008. My 10 year old daughter and myself were the ones to find him. He had 2 major cardiac arrests and aspirated which left him immediately brain dead. Jeff had been diagnosed with Chrones disease 2 years earlier and was going through chemo and steriod treatments. also because of the high doses of prednisone he had to be on he developed diabetes which we were not aware of when I found him his blood sugar was 611.
1 year prior to this on November 17 2007 my oldest daughters biological dad my ex husband committed suicide by hanging. I never have gotten though that one and I am now falling apart about everything. Since I posted this the xhild I was expecting now has no father due to him passing away on 4-7-11 from suicide by hanging as well as have lost the woman I cared for in my home. The blows keep coming and I fear I will never not know death.

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Latest Activity

Profile IconSamiie and Lauren N Sanboeuf joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
6 hours ago
Brett Bowman replied to Tamicah's discussion Worst Documented Day of my life in the group I miss my Mom!
"Tamicah, every second that passes by is one second that brings you closer to your mom. The Lord will come for you in his time. I'm waiting too. It's been five years for me and I haven't grown accustomed to being without my mom. I miss…"
8 hours ago
Liv replied to Liv's discussion New to this severity of grief
"Sorry for the bitterness last night. I just really needed this, and the disappointment is crushing me. Oh well. Better get used to it, I guess."
11 hours ago
Robbie and Rosie are now friends
21 hours ago
Liv replied to Liv's discussion New to this severity of grief
"Hey all, So, Halloween is coming up. It is always my favorite holiday or time of year. Or at least it was. I don't know now. I was really looking forward to it, even after my dad passed. It was something that I could do to make me feel normal…"
23 hours ago
Jennifer Hughes left a comment for Rosie
"Thank you for your kind message, Rosie.  I'm sure this will be a place of comfort and friendship for me when I need it most.  I look forward to being there for others in the group, as well."
Profile IconJennifer C and Jennifer Hughes joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tamicah added a discussion to the group I miss my Mom!

Worst Documented Day of my life

On the 1st of July 2020, I watched my life take her last breath. My life was and in many ways still is about my mother. I have never felt more lost and empty than I do now since she left. Fast forward to the 4th of October and I attempted suicide. I was unsuccessful unfortunately. I still don't want to be here but I'm forcing myself to live because I mean I wake up everyday so clearly God isn't ready to accept me into his kingdom.Until then nothing about life feels okay. I really miss my mom.

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