Debbie Varga
  • Female
  • Ste. Genevieve, Missouri
  • United States
Share

Debbie Varga's Friends

  • beverly ann
  • Charlotte

Debbie Varga's Groups

Gifts Received

Gift

Debbie Varga has not received any gifts yet

Give a Gift

 

Debbie Varga's Page

Latest Activity

Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Andrea, I am sorry that your dad's symptoms were overlooked. I would feel the same way you do in your shoes. I know that my stepdad also knew something wasn't right, that he wasn't well. But, he was too proud or stubborn (don't…"
Feb 10, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Kirstine, Sorry I haven't been online in a while to reply. I envy you your tears. My therapist has assured me that my tears will come. I have cried a little bit, shorts little bursts of tears, but I am either interrupted by my kids, or work,…"
Feb 10, 2010
Marsha "Marcy" Welch replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"We missed it too with my Mom. She had fought the battle with cancer three times, and the fourth time, it somehow slipped past us, AND her doctors. I felt it in the pit of my stomach, and I knew something was wrong. She stopped eating and her skin…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"to make things worse today my husband's friend said his mom has had the exact same cancer that my mom has for 10 years but the chemo has kept her alive all this time, like I wanted my mom to keep doing (the chemo), so the should have/could…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I've got the opposite problem, I can't stop crying. I guess we all deal with things differently. I am going to try to find a therapist myself, I think that is a good idea. I just need someone to vent to. Like you, I miss my mom so much and…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Andrea, Don't beat yourself up with the could have should have's. I feel the same way. My mom's doctor wanted her to continue chemo back in August b/c he said it was working, but my mom and step dad decided that she was going to stop…"
Jan 31, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Kirstine, I am so very sorry for your loss. It hurts so badly, I know. It is so hard to watch someone you love so much suffer. The last week of his life, my dad was in a lot of pain. The medicine helped but then he was so out of it. It was very…"
Jan 29, 2010
beverly ann and Debbie Varga are now friends
Jan 29, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I just lost my mom to stage 4 lung cancer on Friday. We too missed the signs, in fact there were none until she complained of a bad back ache almost 2 years ago. She never smoked and was very healthy, had blood work done and everything came back…"
Jan 29, 2010
Rochelle Kramer commented on Debbie Varga's blog post How do I post a profile photo?
"go to "my page" click on the picture of the flower (where u profile pic should be) and it will take you to a page where you can upload one. If that doesnt work. Look to the left side of your page and where it says "manage" click…"
Jan 27, 2010
Debbie Varga updated their profile
Jan 23, 2010
Debbie Varga posted a blog post

How do I post a profile photo?

I have been able to upload photos, but I can't seem to add one as my profile photo. Can anyone help?
Jan 23, 2010
Debbie Varga posted photos
Jan 12, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to imstillgrieving's discussion Hello im new here
"Jennessa, I feel the same way you do about talking to strangers online about my losses. I know that I have very good friends, but my closest friends have not lost their dad. I have one friend who did, and we have talked a bit, but it is hard for us…"
Jan 12, 2010
Debbie Varga added a discussion to the group I love my Dad.
Thumbnail

Emotions in a Jumble

My emotions are all jumbled up right now. I just had the one year anniversary of my grandma's death (my biological dad's mom) on Friday. The one year anniversary of my grandma (mom's mom) is this Friday. We just got through the 'first' of several significant things since the deaths of my grandmas and my stepdad (who passed in July): my son's birthday, my birthday, my daughter's birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, my stepdad's birthday, the new year. I don't even know what I'm feeling, or which…See More
Jan 10, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to imstillgrieving's discussion Hello im new here
"I am sorry for the loss you are feeling. I have no idea how to move through the grief process. That is why I came here a week ago. I am trying, I guess. It helps to just read what others are going through on this site. I don't feel so alone."
Jan 9, 2010

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a 40 y/o married mother of two (ages 5, 3). I am home with my children during the day and work part-time evenings a few days a week.
About my Loss:
I lost my beloved step-father on July 24, 2009 and feel like I have not even begun to grieve because I have been so focused on helping my children with their grief (which is substantial). He began to have pain in his right shoulder in June, and an MRI in July showed metastatic cancer (bones, brain, lungs). There was nothing that could be done, so we called hospice in and he passed two weeks later. It was all so fast that it still doesn't seem real. He has always been a part of my life, since I was about 10, and he was the father I always wanted (my own father was a verbally, emotionally, sexually abusive, alcoholic).

Debbie Varga's Photos

Loading…
  • Add Photos
  • View All

Debbie Varga's Blog

How do I post a profile photo?

I have been able to upload photos, but I can't seem to add one as my profile photo. Can anyone help?

Posted on January 23, 2010 at 8:46pm — 1 Comment

I am new here and am not sure what to do to get started

Hi everyone,

I am trying to figure this out. I am new to this site, but not new to online support groups. They all seem to be a bit different.



I am reeling from the holidays and all the emotions I'm feeling. I lost my stepfather in July to cancer, which was diagnosed only two weeks before he passed. In hindsight, there were signs that we all missed to tip us off that something was wrong, but we just took his word that his cough was just his 'sinus crap'.



His death… Continue

Posted on January 1, 2010 at 7:48pm

Comment Wall (2 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 8:57pm on January 23, 2010, beverly ann said…
I'm sorry for the loss of your dad.I lost my mother 5-21-09.She was 59.She died from conjestive heart failure.I know what you're going through.I new to this group can you plz tell me how to invite friends?
At 4:04am on January 2, 2010, Courtney Rice said…
Of course a step dad counts! Everyone counts! He was your dad...I was adopted, and he was my dad. The pain is the same, You've lost a parent.
Don't kick yourself about not seeing it coming. It does no good. My dad died rather suddenly, But my husband, mom and I all failed to read the signs for what they were. I missed the signs related to my best friend since childhood. I misread the signs involved in the loss that brought me to this site. If I could not see warnings after so many previous experiences, how could you possibly? And if you focus on that, it will only serve to cause you pain that you don't deserve.
I'm sure your step dad would not want that for you. Focus on the love he brought into your life. Be thankful for every moment you had him. That is what he would want for you. The one's who truly love us, don't want us to be in this pain. Of course, it's that same love that causes it. Though this all seems so permanent, it's an illusion. We will be with our loved ones again. And they are with us, every time we think of them with love.
Courtney
 
 
 

Groups

Latest Activity

Rj commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Gale, last night was a very hard night for me also. Every day is hard but seemed exceptional last night. I guess weekends are more difficult, thats when we would meet and catch up on life. It was what i looked forward to each week. Like you, i miss…"
9 minutes ago
MarieSte posted a photo
47 minutes ago
Michele replied to Michele's discussion Dealing with Loss of Sister by Fire in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Thank you so much for your reply. I am planning a trip up there probably next late next week. I just feel in my heart that I just have to do it. It is so hard to wrap my brain around the fact that I spoke with her that night at 10 pm and she was…"
1 hour ago
Gabrielle replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Hi Bluebird I haven't experienced any ADC's. Having said that she's been stuck in China (where this happened) until last week when they finally sent her body back. I don't know if that makes any difference in the spirit world (if…"
2 hours ago
AnneJ commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"P.S. Forgot to add, "Is it better to love and lose", and for me I will say, I wish I had never been born. The 18 years with my soul-mate went by in an instant, and the future without him is blank, empty, and without meaning or joy, or even…"
5 hours ago
AnneJ commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It has been 1 year and 6 months since my beloved dropped dead in front of me from a heart attack. Not one single human being on earth came to help me. After 8 months of being utterly alone, day and night, 24 hours a day, (new town), one sibling came…"
5 hours ago
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello All, I fully agree with all here who say it is better to have loved and lost instead of never having loved this way and not knowing this pain. One of the first things my older sister told me when Joseph passed was that I was one of those…"
6 hours ago
Tildyc commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"George- yep – the well meaning woman is still one of the unaffected. "she and her husband had a talk." " and she knows people who've already dealt with this and he covered quickly" Wow. It's soo insulting when…"
7 hours ago
Ellen Burns updated their profile
8 hours ago
Ellen Burns posted a status
"My son Luke loved his nieces"
8 hours ago
Ellen Burns posted photos
8 hours ago
Tildyc commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I would not trade the life I had life with Mark for anything. I – we- are fortunate to be able to have loved that deeply. And from what I can tell – the deeper we have loved, the deeper this pain is. So I guess – that is supposed…"
9 hours ago
George H commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Just talk to a woman I know she told me all this good stuff I should to get on with my life then she told me that her and her husband had a talk about what to do if one should pass. I told her that all her talks and plans will mean nothing when the…"
9 hours ago
Gale Brunault commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Hello - I'm sitting here at 10PM missing the heck out of my only child Michael.  How could this be happening?  It still so hard to grasp that I won't see, hear or touch my boy in this life again.  There are times (so many)…"
10 hours ago
Dianne M. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I agree with bluebird. This is hell but my life with him has made me a better person and I wouldn't  trade our 20 years for anything....but sure wish we had 20 more... I spend the day with friends and went to church tonight. I drank 2…"
12 hours ago
Mark replied to Steve Suehiro's discussion Life will never be the same without my wife in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Steve   I am deeply sorrow for you loss, I lost my wife 5 weeks ago from a drug overdose.  I have spent that time searching for answers, and learning things I probably didn't want to know.  I feel the exact same way, that I am…"
12 hours ago
John T. replied to Steve Suehiro's discussion Life will never be the same without my wife in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Steve, I hate to say such trite words as I'm sorry for your loss but I truly am.  I identify with a lot of what you wrote.  While I can't claim to know what your unique pain is like, I think I have at least an idea after going…"
12 hours ago
Steve Suehiro added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
Thumbnail

Life will never be the same without my wife

I lost my wife unexpectedly last August 8th - she was only 36.   Came home to cook her her favorite dinner after work and found her still in bed where she was when I had left for work that morning. It appears that she passed away from an accidental overdose, likely soon after I left for work that morning. I cannot being to explain how lost I felt when I found her dead in bed - she was the center of my universe and my best friend.   The darkness that fell upon me that evening  was so…See More
13 hours ago
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I wouldn't want to have missed my life with Diane.  Even though this is such a hellish experience now, she was the greatest blessing of my life and the most important part of it.  Being loved by her is too precious to have missed."
13 hours ago
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"lost, In my opinion, it's better to have found your soulmate and loved them deeply, even though it means life is hell now.  At least, that's how it is for me -- I would never wish that I had not had my love and life with my…"
13 hours ago

© 2015   Created by Diana Y.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service