Debbie Varga
  • Female
  • Ste. Genevieve, Missouri
  • United States
Share on Facebook
Share

Debbie Varga's Friends

  • beverly ann
  • Charlotte

Debbie Varga's Groups

Gifts Received

Gift

Debbie Varga has not received any gifts yet

Give a Gift

 

Debbie Varga's Page

Latest Activity

Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Andrea, I am sorry that your dad's symptoms were overlooked. I would feel the same way you do in your shoes. I know that my stepdad also knew something wasn't right, that he wasn't well. But, he was too proud or stubborn (don't…"
Feb 10, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Kirstine, Sorry I haven't been online in a while to reply. I envy you your tears. My therapist has assured me that my tears will come. I have cried a little bit, shorts little bursts of tears, but I am either interrupted by my kids, or work,…"
Feb 10, 2010
Marsha "Marcy" Welch replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"We missed it too with my Mom. She had fought the battle with cancer three times, and the fourth time, it somehow slipped past us, AND her doctors. I felt it in the pit of my stomach, and I knew something was wrong. She stopped eating and her skin…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"to make things worse today my husband's friend said his mom has had the exact same cancer that my mom has for 10 years but the chemo has kept her alive all this time, like I wanted my mom to keep doing (the chemo), so the should have/could…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I've got the opposite problem, I can't stop crying. I guess we all deal with things differently. I am going to try to find a therapist myself, I think that is a good idea. I just need someone to vent to. Like you, I miss my mom so much and…"
Jan 31, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Andrea, Don't beat yourself up with the could have should have's. I feel the same way. My mom's doctor wanted her to continue chemo back in August b/c he said it was working, but my mom and step dad decided that she was going to stop…"
Jan 31, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Kirstine, I am so very sorry for your loss. It hurts so badly, I know. It is so hard to watch someone you love so much suffer. The last week of his life, my dad was in a lot of pain. The medicine helped but then he was so out of it. It was very…"
Jan 29, 2010
beverly ann and Debbie Varga are now friends
Jan 29, 2010
Kirstine Rushing replied to Debbie Varga's discussion How did we miss the signs? in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I just lost my mom to stage 4 lung cancer on Friday. We too missed the signs, in fact there were none until she complained of a bad back ache almost 2 years ago. She never smoked and was very healthy, had blood work done and everything came back…"
Jan 29, 2010
Rochelle Kramer commented on Debbie Varga's blog post How do I post a profile photo?
"go to "my page" click on the picture of the flower (where u profile pic should be) and it will take you to a page where you can upload one. If that doesnt work. Look to the left side of your page and where it says "manage" click…"
Jan 27, 2010
Debbie Varga updated their profile
Jan 23, 2010
Debbie Varga posted a blog post

How do I post a profile photo?

I have been able to upload photos, but I can't seem to add one as my profile photo. Can anyone help?
Jan 23, 2010
Debbie Varga posted photos
Jan 12, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to imstillgrieving's discussion Hello im new here
"Jennessa, I feel the same way you do about talking to strangers online about my losses. I know that I have very good friends, but my closest friends have not lost their dad. I have one friend who did, and we have talked a bit, but it is hard for us…"
Jan 12, 2010
Debbie Varga added a discussion to the group I love my Dad.
Thumbnail

Emotions in a Jumble

My emotions are all jumbled up right now. I just had the one year anniversary of my grandma's death (my biological dad's mom) on Friday. The one year anniversary of my grandma (mom's mom) is this Friday. We just got through the 'first' of several significant things since the deaths of my grandmas and my stepdad (who passed in July): my son's birthday, my birthday, my daughter's birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, my stepdad's birthday, the new year. I don't even know what I'm feeling, or which…See More
Jan 10, 2010
Debbie Varga replied to imstillgrieving's discussion Hello im new here
"I am sorry for the loss you are feeling. I have no idea how to move through the grief process. That is why I came here a week ago. I am trying, I guess. It helps to just read what others are going through on this site. I don't feel so alone."
Jan 9, 2010

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a 40 y/o married mother of two (ages 5, 3). I am home with my children during the day and work part-time evenings a few days a week.
About my Loss:
I lost my beloved step-father on July 24, 2009 and feel like I have not even begun to grieve because I have been so focused on helping my children with their grief (which is substantial). He began to have pain in his right shoulder in June, and an MRI in July showed metastatic cancer (bones, brain, lungs). There was nothing that could be done, so we called hospice in and he passed two weeks later. It was all so fast that it still doesn't seem real. He has always been a part of my life, since I was about 10, and he was the father I always wanted (my own father was a verbally, emotionally, sexually abusive, alcoholic).

Debbie Varga's Photos

Loading…
  • Add Photos
  • View All

Debbie Varga's Blog

How do I post a profile photo?

I have been able to upload photos, but I can't seem to add one as my profile photo. Can anyone help?

Posted on January 23, 2010 at 8:46pm — 1 Comment

I am new here and am not sure what to do to get started

Hi everyone,

I am trying to figure this out. I am new to this site, but not new to online support groups. They all seem to be a bit different.



I am reeling from the holidays and all the emotions I'm feeling. I lost my stepfather in July to cancer, which was diagnosed only two weeks before he passed. In hindsight, there were signs that we all missed to tip us off that something was wrong, but we just took his word that his cough was just his 'sinus crap'.



His death… Continue

Posted on January 1, 2010 at 7:48pm

Comment Wall (2 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 8:57pm on January 23, 2010, beverly ann said…
I'm sorry for the loss of your dad.I lost my mother 5-21-09.She was 59.She died from conjestive heart failure.I know what you're going through.I new to this group can you plz tell me how to invite friends?
At 4:04am on January 2, 2010, Courtney Rice said…
Of course a step dad counts! Everyone counts! He was your dad...I was adopted, and he was my dad. The pain is the same, You've lost a parent.
Don't kick yourself about not seeing it coming. It does no good. My dad died rather suddenly, But my husband, mom and I all failed to read the signs for what they were. I missed the signs related to my best friend since childhood. I misread the signs involved in the loss that brought me to this site. If I could not see warnings after so many previous experiences, how could you possibly? And if you focus on that, it will only serve to cause you pain that you don't deserve.
I'm sure your step dad would not want that for you. Focus on the love he brought into your life. Be thankful for every moment you had him. That is what he would want for you. The one's who truly love us, don't want us to be in this pain. Of course, it's that same love that causes it. Though this all seems so permanent, it's an illusion. We will be with our loved ones again. And they are with us, every time we think of them with love.
Courtney
 
 
 

Latest Activity

Sue Sedia replied to Jessica 's discussion My mom died when I stepped out of the room and it hurts really bad!!!!# in the group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks Jessica, yours will be with you too.  "
3 hours ago
JO B replied to JO B's discussion mad at god
"2 day im on low 1 so why do u hav it in 4 me  it feals lk u hav it in 4 me "
3 hours ago
JO B commented on Diana Y's blog post 12 steps - grief
"im on a bit of a low 1 on hear i feal ok 2 grief coz i dont get toll way i feall  say god got plans but he/she plans can be bad "
3 hours ago
bluebird commented on Diana Y's blog post 12 steps - grief
"First of all, thank you for starting this website.  Many people, myself included, have found some small measure of comfort here. Regarding the article posted above -- I'm sure those steps are true for some people, and it's good for…"
6 hours ago
bluebird commented on Jennifer's status
"I understand, as much as anyone else can. I understand wanting to live in the past forever, to be back in your beloved's arms, to not want the future. I want our life back; I want to go back in time and change things, make my husband go to the…"
6 hours ago
Sammie commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Morgan the surgery went good. She is still in the hospital but she is doing very good. She might be getting out tomorrow but that is not for sure yet."
10 hours ago
Jessica replied to Jessica 's discussion My mom died when I stepped out of the room and it hurts really bad!!!!# in the group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you Sue, there is no doubt that she loved me because we always had a special bond!!! I guess it is not so much that I wanted to see her go with my own to eyes. It is that I wanted her to be by her side when she exited this world like she was…"
13 hours ago
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"sammie……what happened with your surgery?  Been thinking about you but figured you might be out of it somewhat under anesthesia…..Whatever is  and wherever you are…..sending you lots of light……morgan"
18 hours ago
Sue Sedia replied to Sue Sedia's discussion So alone.
"Thanks Briar, I do hug my pets a lot lately. lol It just would be nice to get that hug back. I'll try something of my Mom's maybe that'll help. thanks."
18 hours ago
Jennifer posted a status
"It hurts, I just want to live the past forever I just want to be back into his arm, I don't want to be in the future, I just want him back"
19 hours ago
Briar21 commented on Felicia Sanders's blog post Please, God...
"Hugs!"
21 hours ago
Briar21 replied to Sue Sedia's discussion So alone.
"Lots of virtual hugs! Maybe see about finding a different therapy group to see if it is a better fit. The crying and everything else is normal. I have support of my family and I still feel so alone. I actually got out one of my Mom's stuffed…"
21 hours ago
Diana Y posted a blog post

12 steps - grief

12 Steps in Grief Process1.RECOVER FROM A LOVED ONE'S DEATH REQUIRES MORE THAN TIME.Yet, if we allow ourselves the time to mourn we can gradually break grief's grip on us. Recognizing the role and value of the grieving process orients us to accepting the fact of the death. Acceptance marks a major step towards recovery.2.GRIEF IS UNIVERSAL - GRIEVERS ARE DISTINCTIVE.Grieving follows a pattern, but each griever experiences it differently. Awareness of the basic pattern reveals common ground for…See More
23 hours ago
Diana Y commented on Diana Y's group Grief Counseling
"12 steps - Grief"
23 hours ago
JO B replied to JO B's discussion why me in the group Grief Counseling
"yep i do evry day cpz of so mush loss"
yesterday
Sue Sedia replied to Jessica 's discussion My mom died when I stepped out of the room and it hurts really bad!!!!# in the group I miss my Mom!
"I am so sorry for your loss. My Mom just died as well. I just wanted to say, you were there for your Mom. You were there all the while. You could not control the very moment she passed, but you were there,  and  you comforted her and told…"
yesterday
Profile IconSue Sedia and John Doe joined Karen's group
Thumbnail

I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
yesterday
Sue Sedia posted a discussion

So alone.

I've been feeling worse. It's been over two weeks. Yesterday all I did was cry. I do not have anyone of my own. My brother is the only one left and he always winds up making me feel bad. No one in his family, his wife, my niece or his Mother In Law has reached out to me since the funeral. I feel abandoned. I did not expect them to be my new family but I thought they would care. Offer to help in some way. Have me over...they live down the street. It hurts. I feel like they are mad at me. Like I…See More
yesterday
Linda Engberg and Vanessa Stinnitt are now friends
yesterday
Vanessa Stinnitt posted a status
"I list my spiyse in han on the3rd.will thus pain gr t better,i feel like i just dont have the want to live like i did"
yesterday

© 2016   Created by Diana Y.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service