Motivated to do great things in life. I plan to accomplish my dreams plus some. Partly motivated by my past, to make the world a better place for everyone. Empowerment is the word.
Conservative, but believe in equality and freedom for all. Everyone has a right to their own life choices, opportunities and consequences. People are so nosy and controlling of others. Live your own life.
I am honesty to the point of ridiculousness. I refuse to fool myself for convenience sake. I am private, but that's because everyone has a right to their own personal thoughts. I am always growing as a person, or at least like to believe so. I am human, imperfect, quite flawed, and beautiful. What I share, it will be honesty and genuine. You don't need to know my birthday or favorite color, etc..., just that I'm a orphan and whatever else I share. I hope to find a great community of orphans like myself so that we may help each other feel less alone in our life circumstances. It greatly helps the inner loneliness to know I'm not alone in this sea of people calling their mothers by they walk by on the sidewalk.
About my Loss:
Orphaned as a teen, due to private painful circumstances, but finding that in my young twenties, I feel quite alone despite all the love around me. They can call a "mother" or "father". They can't imagine the loneliness of being on your own (not that I don't appreciate the love of those around me or can't smile or laugh or dream, I do). I'm here because I'm searching for a community who can understand my inner feelings without knowing my details, who understands the pain of, no matter how many years pass, of not having anyone to run to for the kind of support only parents/parental figures can give. Those who understand that silent pain that society overlooks. I wish I could tell others to appreciate their parents. Bad parents and lack of parents (regardless of how good/bad they were when alive) are two completely different animals. Sometimes, there is no regaining of parental figure relationships, and you have to braid your own hair.
Loss of family history, loss of knowing who you are (Granted, you can become anything, but the points stands), loss of stability (coming home to mom for a weekend), loss of characters that shaped you (episodes of "friends" and cooking together) and increase of personal responsibility. In short, it's lonely and scary. No-one to take some of the responsibility for you. On your own. Even adults beyond their young twenties depend on their parents for something, even if only support. The loss of parental figures, and the knowledge that parental figures is dead for you. I braid my own hair, and will never expect someone else to do it. Loss of days that were.
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