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About Me:
Married to my second husband, residing in Canada. i am originally from NC and most of my family members still reside there. i've survived a lot of death in my family/friends, especially before adulthood.
no longer in Canada...back in NC, my home state, so i can hopefully reconnect with my son and finally visit some with my grandson. i left my husband on a decent note--we're still friends and supporting one another. i'm finding it harder and harder to keep going, lately, as the end of the year approaches. *sigh
About my Loss:
My daughter died 15 February 2017. She was at home with her fiance and their son (4), when her fiance went up to check on her, and found her unresponsive. He called 911 and they worked on her...she died there of an apparent overdose.

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B.Windsor's Blog

it's been one year

Tomorrow, it'll be one year since Shelby died. No matter how things seem at any given time, the darkness has set in.  i just can't shake it.  i've continued having physical issues going on, and haven't been able to get in to see the doctor, yet--my appointment is for Monday.  i'm tired of trying to keep going.  i still haven't even begun to work on the planning of Shelby's going away party, yet, either.  *sigh  At this point, my hope is that once i can get straightened out, or at least find…


Posted on February 14, 2018 at 8:34pm

xmas 2017

It's been ten months...and it hurts as much as it did when i first found out Shelby died.  For some sadistic reason, which i will never understand, my ex and his mother continue their games.  *sigh  Some days, it's so  hard to even move outta bed to do anything, other than hope....Hope i can finally meet and visit with my grandson (Shelby's son) and HOPE for some sort of reconciliation or understanding with my son.  If either of those is not possible, why am i even here?  A lil over a…


Posted on December 25, 2017 at 9:03am

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Gilda commented on Diana, Certified Grief Counselor's group I love my Dad.
"Welcome, Mary Kay, I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I can relate to everything you wrote about the loss of your beloved dad, except I was alone with him in the hospital when he passed away. It's the worst thing in the world to lose the…"
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My Story

When I was twelve my mother was murdered then my beloved sweet grandmother died when I was 18. My maternal grandfather died when I was 22. My maternal grandmother died when I was 33 and my final living parent/grandparent died when I was 35.  I lived with a lot of loss most of it came at a sudden clip.  I'm left with incredible feeling of loneliness even though I've been married for 20+ years and have two wonderful children.  It's tough to share my true feelings with my wife because it's so hard…See More

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