B.Windsor
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  • United States
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B.Windsor posted a blog post

it's been one year

Tomorrow, it'll be one year since Shelby died. No matter how things seem at any given time, the darkness has set in.  i just can't shake it.  i've continued having physical issues going on, and haven't been able to get in to see the doctor, yet--my appointment is for Monday.  i'm tired of trying to keep going.  i still haven't even begun to work on the planning of Shelby's going away party, yet, either.  *sigh  At this point, my hope is that once i can get straightened out, or at least find out…See More
Feb 14
B.Windsor commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"My heart continues to ache for all who have lost or/and continue to lose loved ones.  It is truly a heavy burden.  *Much love to you all!  Thank you--those who work for the site and comment and just keep going!   i just…"
Feb 6
B.Windsor commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"It's hard enough trying to go on since Shelby died...but, the mess my ex and his mother keep pulling really don't help anything/anyone.  *sigh  i've second-guessed every step i've ever made, since her death, and…"
Jan 1
B.Windsor posted a blog post

xmas 2017

It's been ten months...and it hurts as much as it did when i first found out Shelby died.  For some sadistic reason, which i will never understand, my ex and his mother continue their games.  *sigh  Some days, it's so  hard to even move outta bed to do anything, other than hope....Hope i can finally meet and visit with my grandson (Shelby's son) and HOPE for some sort of reconciliation or understanding with my son.  If either of those is not possible, why am i even here?  A lil over a month…See More
Dec 25, 2017
B.Windsor posted photos
Dec 25, 2017
B.Windsor updated their profile
Dec 13, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Laura Rozier's group Losing Someone to Drug Overdose
"i've been in NC now, for a lil over three weeks.  i just got back from the tree lighting/holiday parade for the community here, and i had a really tough time.  All i had to do was sit down and Shelby's death hit me all over…"
Dec 1, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Laura Rozier's group Losing Someone to Drug Overdose
"About four days left here in Canada, for me.  My current husband knows of all my feelings regarding my need to get back to North Carolina, so i can try to reconnect with my son, and visit with my grandson--make sure he's safe and doing…"
Nov 9, 2017
B.Windsor posted a status
"Less'n two weeks left here in Canada; headed to NC to be closer to my son and grandson. My life has had little/no meaning other than them."
Nov 1, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Laura Rozier's group Losing Someone to Drug Overdose
"What do you do when the anger sets in?  i really didn't think i'd have this immense surge of anger, especially when i can't pinpoint who, why, etc.  i know i feel at least some anger for my daughter, even though she's…"
Jul 6, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Since i hadn't received the autopsy report from the medical examiners' office, and i felt like i was really missing something, regarding Shelby, i called to check.  Apparently, they'd sent it, once before--i never saw it--so, she…"
Jun 22, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Multiple Losses Group
"Honestly, i don't know what to think/believe at this point.  My daughter died a few months ago and we're still waiting for the autopsy results.  We got the toxicology results back and she had several types of opiods in her…"
May 30, 2017
B.Windsor joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Multiple Losses Group

I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce.Many of us have lost more than one person or event.Come share!See More
May 30, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Laura Rozier's group Losing Someone to Drug Overdose
"My daughter, Shelby, died 15 Feb 2017 of an overdose from a variety of opiods.  These things are so dangerous, and it's so easy to get them.  Since i've been in Canada, my ex wasn't even going to let me know she'd died,…"
May 15, 2017
B.Windsor joined Laura Rozier's group
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Losing Someone to Drug Overdose

If you've lost someone you loved due to them overdosing on drugs, let's talk about it here.See More
May 15, 2017
B.Windsor commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Well, we went to the 'mass' Monday evening and Shelby's name was mentioned, as were a couple other individuals.  It was extremely annoying, though, since the announcer did not even get the first letter of her last name correct,…"
May 10, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
Married to my second husband, residing in Canada. i am originally from NC and most of my family members still reside there. i've survived a lot of death in my family/friends, especially before adulthood.
update:
no longer in Canada...back in NC, my home state, so i can hopefully reconnect with my son and finally visit some with my grandson. i left my husband on a decent note--we're still friends and supporting one another. i'm finding it harder and harder to keep going, lately, as the end of the year approaches. *sigh
About my Loss:
My daughter died 15 February 2017. She was at home with her fiance and their son (4), when her fiance went up to check on her, and found her unresponsive. He called 911 and they worked on her...she died there of an apparent overdose.

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B.Windsor's Blog

it's been one year

Tomorrow, it'll be one year since Shelby died. No matter how things seem at any given time, the darkness has set in.  i just can't shake it.  i've continued having physical issues going on, and haven't been able to get in to see the doctor, yet--my appointment is for Monday.  i'm tired of trying to keep going.  i still haven't even begun to work on the planning of Shelby's going away party, yet, either.  *sigh  At this point, my hope is that once i can get straightened out, or at least find…

Continue

Posted on February 14, 2018 at 8:34pm

xmas 2017

It's been ten months...and it hurts as much as it did when i first found out Shelby died.  For some sadistic reason, which i will never understand, my ex and his mother continue their games.  *sigh  Some days, it's so  hard to even move outta bed to do anything, other than hope....Hope i can finally meet and visit with my grandson (Shelby's son) and HOPE for some sort of reconciliation or understanding with my son.  If either of those is not possible, why am i even here?  A lil over a…

Continue

Posted on December 25, 2017 at 9:03am

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Monty replied to Pamela philipp's discussion FAILING in the group Lost My Spouse...
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Lori Gersbeck joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Orphaned Adults

This group is for adults who have lost both parents and are struggling with coming to terms with this impact, which is harder then you realize till it happens to you.
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Fran replied to Pamela philipp's discussion FAILING in the group Lost My Spouse...
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Crystal Parker posted photos
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Friday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Pamela, Those are hurtful things you had to deal with.  I am so fortunate that drinking was never a frequent activity with most of my family.  The only thing I can say is this.  I am the one feeling guilty, desperately hoping my Mom…"
Thursday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Thursday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, the dr may realize that he didn’t tell me what was going on in the hospital and that’s why I have all the questions.  I blame myself for getting upset with him, then not seeking him out but he might feel responsible. I…"
Thursday
Pamela philipp commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia yes I will tell you what she lied about who my father is my mother told me the man who is on my birth certificate was my father but he told me I was not his daughter and I look like my so called step father who raised me since I was a baby…"
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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, Are you having more symptoms to make you think this?  Or is it from the anxiety of the one you had?  Did they say how long it would take for it to resolve?  "
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