Losing Someone to Cancer

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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.

Members: 609
Latest Activity: Aug 23, 2019

Discussion Forum

I feel worse 2 and a half years on, than I ever did. 11 Replies

Started by Michael Thompson. Last reply by morgan May 12, 2019.

Give yourself time to heal

Started by Felicia Evans May 8, 2018.

Still lost and broken 2 Replies

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by Pamela philipp Jan 5, 2018.

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Comment by Michael Thompson on April 18, 2019 at 3:28am

In my opinion as a Widower by 4 and a half years, men find dealing with being alone and loneliness harder than woman, this is what widows I meet tell me. 

I strive on a daily basis to at least be less anxious, but I miss my right arm in my wife. 

There is also a certain inner confidence that comes with marriage, its gone when your spouse dies. 

Comment by Virginia G on January 2, 2019 at 10:58am

Michael,

i love the line, “we always had a visit from the spirit, the sparkle, and the magic of Santa Claus.”

I would call my Mom Mrs. Claus.

She would make everyday like Christmas.

Comment by dream moon JO B on December 30, 2018 at 2:46pm

big c is evil

dem/alz is evil

its 1s it sea luvd 1s suffer its lk we feal it to we do

yore articl  is so sweet it is so truee 

Comment by morgan on December 30, 2018 at 2:39pm

Michael, What a beautifully written,  heartfelt tribute to your wife and the impact of what death drops at the doorstep when we lose our beloved. You gave a gift to those who read your message of what the true spirit of love and purpose of living should be, including how overwhelming it is when the practicalities of life are heaped upon those whose emotional wheels have crashed into a wall.  Well done and I hope the readers of the paper take heart in what you have written......thank you for sharing it with all of us here. ........

Comment by Linda Engberg on December 30, 2018 at 2:20pm

Michael,

I just loved your article. it was so true and very touching to all of us who have to endure Christmas without our soulmate.

Comment by Michael Thompson on December 30, 2018 at 1:42pm
Comment by Pamela philipp on November 30, 2018 at 12:40pm

hi Michael I agree with all that you said it has been a little over three years since I lost my mom 9-6-15 and then the love of my life my husband on9-14-15 and I am as lost as ever we were married in august of1992 I miss him every day

Comment by dream moon JO B on November 22, 2018 at 5:07pm

sum 1 i no big c spreed to her iv new ths lady sinsess i wz 8 im 44 now

i ask why sush a sweet lovin person its 

Comment by Linda Engberg on November 7, 2018 at 5:46am

Hi Michael,

I don't think women cope any better then men and I am living proof.  Each day I wake up and I am looking at another day in Hell. I still go through this world without any meaning except for my sweet dog Babie J. Now I am going through the same thing I did with My Husband, watching this sweet girl slowly die and again I will have to deal with another grief again. I know death is a part of life but I as a person can't deal with it and never will. 

Comment by Michael Thompson on November 6, 2018 at 3:13pm

When I married for the first time in 1992 to a most beautiful lady, this was my proud day, I felt a whole person with this beautiful lady by my side.

We had 22 years together, but she died of bowel cancer in 2014, she suffered for 11 months,

Now im alone, but always very much a loner, as she was, when we met in 1991, it was instant chemistry, but now grief and stress remain taking their toll. I am in a survival mode.

I look for reasons why this beautiful lady was taken from me, knowing people are enduring the same across the western world.

Death is part of life they tell me, so if death is part of life, what are we to learn from it.?

Are we to learn that our loved one, our best friend, our rock has indeed gone to a better place ?, another place ?, or are we to learn that there is nothing after life but eternal darkness, like a long sleep.?

I'm a thinking man, and trying to get my head round that life is a journey, not a destination....

I am trying really hard to feel better in myself as a man, I am told by older ladies that I meet who are in my situation, that women cope better than men.

But I do know that the suicide rate among men who lose their wives is far greater than it is among woman.

I am living the life of a recluse now, I have always been the quiet type, unless angered, I do wear my heart on my sleeve, my wife didnt, she was quiet charming and serine.


 

 

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Shirelle posted a status
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Sue M commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, I have seven tattoos one for each year Julian has been gone. It is my way of honoring him  People make fun of me saying I am too old (71) to have them. Glad to hear I am not the only one still honoring their spouse after death."
Jan 13
Serenity replied to Linda Engberg's discussion Ending my Life
"Wow..you suicide yourself there us no place for you in heaven. You will find yourself again and life will go on without your dearly departed. Learn to love yourself find what you like to do there has to something. Think of it like this he…"
Jan 12
Serenity replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely again
"It is a tradgedy to lose a loved one. But it does get better. Not everyday will be the same some days burn to the core more than others. Find a hobby or volunteer or help someone basically find something to do to ease the monotony of the day. In…"
Jan 12
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you Linda.  It's beautiful for you to had done that.  I have tattoo of our names in a heart.  I wear two sets of our wedding bands on both pinkys and ring fingers.  We're still married and always will be forever.…"
Jan 12
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, What a beautiful post. I have a tattoo on my shoulder of both our hands on our wedding day. I added my own words. God be with you."
Jan 12
Serenity is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 12
Rick Rilloraza left a comment for morgan
"Yes I still miss her terribly.  I am still sad and angry.  I was left with two boys ages 12 and 8 at that time.  What kept me going was making sure they were provided for and raised well.  I still have full on bawls when the…"
Jan 11
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Reliving two years ago.  Ten days till She took Her last exhaling breath in my arms.  She went knowing that we will be together forever and it can't come soon enough for me. Till then:"
Jan 11
morgan left a comment for Rick Rilloraza
"Rick, I am curious because I am within a week of being a widow of seven years how you are doing it allotter eight years?  Today, and more often lately (lets say for about the past six months) I have become more angry and more hateful of having…"
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Just another year closer to death I pray."
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