February 2014 Blog Posts (14)

What do you do?

On January 31, 2014 my partner of eight years had an argument because she had been cheating on me and I was DONE. During the night she was restless and kept waking me up wanting to know where my phone was or where the charger was. Then she said "You're gonna learn." She was alive when I left Saturday morning. She had written a note but my anger and hurt from her betrayal blinded me to the contents of the letter. I wrote her a letter back telling her to go be happy. I assumed she would be…

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Added by Danielle Hamilton on February 28, 2014 at 12:23pm — 1 Comment

When death and career collide ( in need of help)

Hello reader,



My brother was murdered while serving legal documents about three years ago now. I still grieve for him everyday. This was my job for over twenty years and after his death I continued for another two years. I had a bit of a breakdown after a lot of pent up feelings surfaced. I vowed to never be threatened in the way my brother must have been for a twenty five dollar service for an uncaring attorney. Never again. It's been a year. I have been job searching for months.… Continue

Added by Leslie Brown on February 27, 2014 at 12:35pm — No Comments

I wish I could talk to someone about this that really understood but instead I clean clean like crazy and work work real hard and discipline myself with what I eat and continue to lose weight 44 lbs …

I wish I could talk to someone about this that really understood but instead I clean clean like crazy and work work real hard and discipline myself with what I eat and continue to lose weight 44 lbs so far and keep so busy i dont think or hurt only on nights like this when it finally catches up some comfort in knowing i really am not alone.. Continue

Added by Cyn Rios on February 26, 2014 at 6:47pm — No Comments

Contemplation

I contemplate contacting the killer I guess i want to convince myself he is not evil he made a mistake hes repentful I can forgive truly forgive him..can I? I try..He took my brother and 2 others wasnt there another way?? I want to yell at him, wasnt there another way???? Did you have to kill him, (Im screaming at him these words) Why Brian, did you go down that path why did you not heed my warnings in the letters why did you have to go so young, barely experiencing life..Just don't get it..

Added by Cyn Rios on February 26, 2014 at 6:38pm — No Comments

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Added by Diana, Grief Recovery Coach on February 24, 2014 at 7:21pm — 1 Comment

Love never ending

When he came to the end of his journey, traveled his last weary mile.

I submit sometimes he frowned, but only remember his smile.

As I work on this list trying hard to resist, all that made me sad.

I remember the good he has done all the fum we had.

You see his love is never ending and to this I can attest.

And come in the shade of evening when the sun paints the sky in the west, He stands for a few moments besides me and I remember only his…

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Added by Theresa on February 21, 2014 at 8:12pm — No Comments

My Angel

As I sit and wonder about this day.

I kneel to God and begin to pray.

Help me dear Father, when the pain is so great.

To understand his destiny was not mine to orchestrate.

You let me enjoy him and make memories.

Then you took him to heaven to abide with Thee.

So I'll accept your doing, even though I don't understand.

For I must be someone special to have held a true…

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Added by Theresa on February 18, 2014 at 8:37am — 4 Comments

getting over brothers suicide

about two months ago my teacher told me that she is so sorry about my loss. then she told me that my brother killed himself my brother was my every thing I keep thinking that if I didn't go to school my brother would still be alive. I miss him so so much

Added by noga Elmo on February 17, 2014 at 8:43pm — No Comments

Emotionally cold?

Today has been the day from hell!  

My daughter and her young children moved home a month ago so she can get back on her feet.  I have done everything that I can help her and the kids.  Paid their bills, fed them, kept a roof over their head and never put pressure on them.  However, last night my daughter asked for the father of her children to spend the night.  I stuck by my word there will be no sleep overs.  Of course this led to drama, where her and my husband got into an…

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Added by Tracey L on February 16, 2014 at 6:50pm — No Comments

It's been a couple months

Lately I have been struggling and going through a rough time again. My moms anniversary was last week and i've been so busy with life that i'm having a hard time to keep myself floating above water. I feel this rage in me that i'm trying to control. I cant help but be in a bad mood right now and being around people certainly doesn't help. This loss is a big one because my mother was my best friend as a child and i had to grow up without her. I'm at a loss at what to do at this point, i'm…

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Added by Kelsie on February 15, 2014 at 11:42pm — No Comments

Losing Scotty

Our son died from a Heroin overdose this last September, I found him dead in his room, he was 26 years old, we did not know he had a Heroin issue, our hearts are just broken, I miss him so much, he was our third child of four, just having a hard dealing with it

Added by Cynthia on February 8, 2014 at 6:36pm — No Comments

One step, one day at a time...

My wife of 43 years died five weeks ago, very unexpected and sudden.  I realized I had two choices with my relationship with God and His son.  Move closer or move away.  Choose wisely.

Grief to me is a journey, with a beginning and and end.  It starts one step and then one day at a time.  It is like entering a long dark tunnel.  Once you enter you stumble on the obstacles on the floor and run into the walls because you cannot see the way out.  If you believe and have faith in God,…

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Added by Richard on February 8, 2014 at 6:35am — No Comments

Long Winter

Coming up on eight months since my son Jesse died. His birthday, the first Christmas without him. We have had a very hard winter so far. The summer and fall went by in a flash but this winter seems to drag on. I long for spring to see renewal.I find that the people in my life are saying his name less.Some seem worried that the depth of my grief is still immense.Almost as if I should be ''better'' by now. I am enormously resentful that I am supposed to mourn to conform to other peoples…

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Added by Carla Campbell on February 3, 2014 at 4:08pm — 3 Comments

"Where was God?" "Where were my angles?"

I have heard those questions a lot. Heck I've asked those same questions myself over, and over! I don't ask them anymore because I know the answers now. When my little boy burned in that car God was there. When my Ben was killed, and my daughter permanently injured, God was there. He was there all along. I just didn't know it because the pain, grief, and sorrow were so strong I couldn't hear or feel God's presence. I was so angry with God that I didn't want him near me. I didn't want God to…

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Added by anne on February 2, 2014 at 8:04pm — No Comments

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i miss the family its no longer here

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Speed Weasel posted a blog post

The Wheels on (My Grief) Bus Go Round and Round...

New Year - 2025!At the start of the year I returned to Thailand for another medical mission.  This was my fourth trip for this and I was somewhat ready/prepared for the heightened emotions.  Not sure why...no real connection to Jen or her accident, but in the past these trips offer some extended alone time, away from others, away from people that speak the same language and as such seem to bring the thoughts back to the forefront.  Strangely, the same levels of emotionality were not there.  Not…See More
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