My husband passed away in a unexpected accident he left in the morning and never came back. I never got to see exactly how it happened and due to covid virus I actually got only to see him two days before the actual death. I I'm going to an emotional roller coaster at the moment and feel like dying instead of living. He was my soulmate. 

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I'm sorry. My husband died suddenly too, in 2012. He is my soulmate, always. Of course this horrific situation is different for everyone, but to the extent that one person can understand how this is for another, I do have some idea of how you feel, and I feel much the same way.

Elena - I am so very sorry! I lost mine to an MVA when he was working on the opposite coast - this was in midOctober.  I had seen him once in the previous 5 months - I fully empathize with what you are going through - I wish we could sit and talk.

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bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Yes, it is much harder for me to concentrate or focus now.  Grief, sadness, anger, despair -- they have all conspired to make it difficult for me to access my intelligence to the same degree as before my husband died.  That is, my…"
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Jeff C replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Bluebird, I am glad that you took that the right way.  I had a feeling you would know what I meant.  And your description is correct:  I have a general idea of how you feel but it's impossible for me or anyone else to know…"
1 hour ago
Luna Nightshade replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"I guess I can emphasize with the things you loved to do dying with the one you loved - as if that feeling has been pulled along, stretched thin to behind the veil. You don't have the energy to pursue them anymore, and just having something that…"
6 hours ago
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Please don't apologize; I'm sorry I didn't respond to your last post in April, I'm not very good about keeping up with things anymore.  I don't feel that I'm moving forward at all, but I can see how that would work…"
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Jeff C replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"You're welcome, Bluebird.  I didn't agree with everything she said.  The key for me was the "moving forward with" part.  The "move on" expression is very grating to me.  When I am in a nice place I…"
12 hours ago
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
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14 hours ago
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Thanks for the ink to that Ted Talk, Jeff.  I just watched it, and I can identify with some of what the speaker said, but not all of it. It's good that her phrase about moving forward with her husband, not moving on without him,…"
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