A month ago I lost one of my dearest and closest friends to suicide. With my friend's death, my social circle now consists of only one person, my husband. He is a wonderful man, but I know the weight of my grief is a heavy load for him. He now has to be "everything," and that is a stressful role for any one person to play.

Now that the most incapacitating part of my grief is slowly diminishing, my husband and my grief therapist are both encouraging me to broaden my social circle...do volunteer work, join local clubs, etc. I know I need to do this, but right now i find that the sight of other people disgusts me because they're not the one I lost!

Is anyone else finding it intolerable to be around people, especially new people, even though you know it will be good for you? My rational brain knows that no one will replace the person I lost and that i have to appreciate new people for their own qualities, but my heart just seems to immediately judge them as hopelessly subpar compared to the person who is forever gone from me.

Views: 109

Replies to This Discussion

Hello, I can relate. I also had a sudden and traumatic loss. My experience has been to take things at my pace. It is alleviating to keep busy, but at the end of the day grieving catches up with me. Better to be busy within your own comfort zone and let close ones to you aware, if you feel. Most people that I connect on grieving matters agree that those that have not had an occurrence like this in life seem somewhat on the outside. But, I can see that now. My best friends and family members can understand. Best of in your process.

Smiles

RSS

Latest Activity

Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Assumptions

An assumption is an unexamined belief: what is thought to be true without ever really realizing that we think in that way. For better or worse, understanding starts with entertaining the idea that something is true.  Truly profound thoughts generally come to light from the relaxation of these (flawed) assumptions.  This is where I find myself today...Perhaps, one of the more significant drivers to pushing down the loss and grief at the time of the accident, ignoring it and mindlessly walking…See More
Mar 13
Profile IconCari Jo Converse, Jennifer and James D. Thornsberry joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 13
Profile IconMarina Dsouza, Leah, Sandra M Aaron and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 5
esther joined HollowHeart's group
Thumbnail

Sibling Loss

This group is for anyone that has lost a brother or sister. Sibling loss is often minimized and people don't realize how devastating losing a sibling can be. I lost my older sister and my life will never be the same. She was my only sibling, I looked up to her, I went to her for everything. I lost my past, present and future. It is traumatic.See More
Mar 4
Speed Weasel posted a video

Sun Keeps Risin'

Provided to YouTube by The Orchard EnterprisesSun Keeps Risin' · Lissie · Elisabeth Corrin Maurus · Martin CraftMy Wild West℗ 2015 Lionboy RecordsReleased on...
Feb 26
Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Triggers Continue to Surface

Late February is a challenging time of year for me.  Jen’s birthday is the 23rd and serves as an annual reminder of all of the potential that was lost…Her’s (mainly), mine, the world’s honestly.  This year she would be 52…It is increasingly hard to imagine, through all of the iterations possible, what she could have become, what was to be her (significant) impact on the world.That being said, things, emotions, have largely settled down since I committed a potential version of what could have…See More
Feb 15
Michelle joined Gyla Lynn Darden's group
Thumbnail

Loss of a child In memory of my son or daughter

This group focuses on healing ourselves and each other over the death of a child and welcomes a Christian atmosphere to help with the healing process. I welcome all of those grieving.See More
Feb 8
Tammy McLaughlin and Rosie are now friends
Jan 30

© 2024   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service