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Comment by Linda Engberg on March 28, 2018 at 7:30am

If wasn't for the people on thls website, I would lose my mind. We are all in the same boat, this is my 5th Easter without my Husband and I choose to be alone with my thoughts of Easter past with him. Picture with his son Bob

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 19, 2018 at 4:52pm

Hi Maxey,

You don't need to shape up Maxey, because I know I never will.

Comment by Maxey on March 19, 2018 at 1:52pm

Hi, 

i have'nt been around for a while.  I had the ridiculous notion that over time I would get better, but that has not happened.  I think, if anything, I am getting a bit "insane" thinking of how meaningless my life has become.

The few friends I have made since I moved are nice, but I have no inclination to do things with them.  When I do, I am wishing it to be over so I can go home.  When I am home, I then realize how lonely I am and begin the downward spiral of crying and feeling sorry for myself.  I then start thinking, "what if death is just that, and I will not see my love again?".  That makes me so upset that I think I am going to totally lose my mind.

Nothing seems to interest me anymore; I sleep until noon or later to make the days go by.  This surely is "hell" on earth!  Every time I get a pain, I am hoping that it is a sign that I am going to get my wish and die.

Sorry to be a downer, but I am really beginning to worry about my mental health.  I thought I was doing so much better a few months ago, but now I am in an even worse place.  I miss my husband and all the things we used to do.  My neighbor's were telling me how they were planning a cruise and how excited they were.  I had to leave because I could feel the tears welling up.  We used to love to travel and planned something each years when we retired.  Now there is nothing to look forward to, and I am ashamed that I envy others who have their spouses and their happiness.

Wow!  What a wonderful life!?  I hope someone can reply and make me know that this is just not me and I should "shape up"!

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 17, 2018 at 2:41pm

Thank You for caring.

Comment by Marjorie Willcox on March 17, 2018 at 12:23pm

Dear dear Linda we feel for your pain.

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 17, 2018 at 6:04am

Linda,

5 years without my dear Husband and it only gets worse everyday. The only thing to stop is death.

Comment by Meva L Cox on March 17, 2018 at 1:25am

I know I should try to say something like "it will get better, you are not alone, put on a happy face, it doesn't help to feel sorry for yourself, time heals you have a lot of children and grand children which is a great support", and I could go on and on with all the things I have either read or heard. It has been almost 14 months since the Love of my life went to Heaven and I don't feel one bit better. I am on the verge of crying or crying my eyes out most of the time. Jim and I were together for 41 and married for 36 years. It was a second marriage for us both and it couldn't have been much better. I am so lonely and I have a hard time functioningbecause he was my rock and my rock is gone. I wouldn't do anything to myself because I don't believe in it plus I wouldn't do that to my family but I just pray for the time I will be with him again. I pray for all of you going through this unbearable time.

Comment by Sheila Ferguson on March 17, 2018 at 12:17am

I hope it helps because nothing is helping right now.

Comment by bluebird on March 16, 2018 at 11:27pm

Sheila,

It is unbearable. So many of us here are in the same kind of situation, so we can empathize. I hope that coming to this site helps you. {{{{hugs}}}}

Comment by Sheila Ferguson on March 16, 2018 at 11:13pm

I lost my husband in February 2018 and I am finding it unbearable without him.  How are we supposed to carry on like this?  It is terrible.

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