Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Maxey on March 19, 2018 at 6:49pm

Thanks, Joe.  I appreciate you describing your experience during your accident.  It gives me hope that there really is something after this life.  My greatest hope which keeps me going and half way sane is that we will be joined again with our loved ones.

You are so early in this grief state, so I really send my hopes to you that you find some peace since you have experienced such a gift of knowing that death is not painful, but peaceful and welcoming.

I feel better reading your reply; thanks for taking the time.

MAXIE

Permalink Reply by Marjorie Willcox on March 19, 2018 at 4:58pm

Dear Maxey, How I feel for you and can empathise so much.I ask myself that question How can we have been loved & cherished all those years and then be expected to move on within our lives. I too read inspirational stuff & have a psychiatric support worker & am doing an online grief counselling but it always wears off and am back where I started.

Best Wishes

Marjorie xx

Permalink Reply by Sharon Stolp on March 20, 2018 at 5:51am

Hello Maxie, Sharon here. I wasn't blessed with 55 years with my love, we had 46 years together, married at 18 years old. It is 2 years out for me and I miss him so much. I am still going through the days of not getting dressed, not going anywhere, etc., etc. I was referred to acute grief therapy by my family doctor as I have developed some health issues he feels are related to my grief. I went for a few months and experienced the "It's your choice, move forward or stay ""stuck""." I went for the last time 2 weeks ago, my choice. I told her I wasn't returning, nothing she said would bring my beloved back or ease the pain of losing him, BUT that's okay. I don't want healed, I am glad he was my everything.I am glad that losing him hurts so badly because he was loved that much by me. I gues I have developed the attitude of the world has it's way of viewing life, I have mine. I am 66, not looking for a "chapter two", I don't want to try "new experiences" without him. But that's okay too. I know, absolutely, one day we will be together again forever. I , the first summer of his death was in our front yard crying my eyes out when out of nowhere, literally, I smelled him. My beloved's scent, his personal smell, the smell of his skin was surrounding me and it was sheer bliss while it lasted. Then a couple of weeks ago I was cleaning in my kitchen and a song came on by a group called Elevation and it literally brought me to my knees because I saw my husband being held in the loving arms of God. He was safe, he was home. It truly gave me such peaceseeing he was safe. So, it's okay to mourn our love's, it's okay to let the world know they were loved, valued and the hole they have left in their passing. I believe that just because society dictates we should try to move ahead with a new life I don't want one, my "old" life was absolutely fine and I will keep on living it until I join my husband. God bless you. 

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