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Comment by Sherri on December 22, 2017 at 8:54pm

I’m so sorry Tina. My co worker just lost her husband in August she is slowly moving forward and my step father has now found someone new I’m happy for them but just feel stuck and alone also. Today I had to go to a funeral home as my husband long time family friend  passed away this is the first one since my mom it was in the same place and it was  tough I could not bringmy self to go up as all I could see was my mom again. I just told my self he deserved me doing this but he understands how hard this is for me also. 

Today i I also brought my moms ashes to my house since my step dad is going away for Christmas with his new friend I felt my mom shouldn’t be alone and he told me she could stay with me now. I find it tough that he’s moved on but I know everyone grieves in their own way plus she always going to be my mom so as I sit here looking at her I find it even tougher knowing she’s not coming Sunday nor is he and life will never be the same again. 

Comment by Tina on December 22, 2017 at 7:54pm

The stress, grief, depression is making it truly difficult to get through the Christmas season.  I just want it to be over.   Between tears and the then the urge to throat punch people that are annoying and just plain stupid and rude.  No, I haven’t really hit any one, so no need to start a go fund me page for bail money.  Seriously, this is so difficult, a friend from work, asked me today, how I was doing, of course my eyes welled up with tears, and she replied that the first Christmas is the hardest. She lost her husband in 2012 and he was only 42, they were high school sweethearts and their daughter had just graduated high school.  With all of that, she is recently engaged and she is happy again.  

I just feel lost and while I have a husband, kids, grandchildren, pets and a job, I feel alone and so depressed. I really am trying to find my happiness.  While my friend has found happiness and a new love, I know that I will never have my mother back or truly feel like I am loved. 

Comment by Kate on December 22, 2017 at 7:40am

Good morning all! I wrapped a  Christmas gift for my dad last night that my mom had bought him before she passed away. That was so incredibly difficult.  But... upon thinking about wrapping up ALL of those beautiful memories,  I know that I need to be strong for my dad.  My mom left us wonderful memories and for that I am grateful.  Praying for ALL of you during this season. 

Comment by Theresa on December 22, 2017 at 6:01am

I will keep that in my mind today Bluebell

Comment by Brett Bowman on December 21, 2017 at 10:49pm

Edger, I am so sorry. You are in my prayers my friend. Please know that you are welcome here, and that we will help you as best we can.

I miss Joy. I hope that she is okay. I know that she sometimes reads but does not post.

Comment by Sherri on December 21, 2017 at 8:19pm

That’s a beautiful quote bluebell thanks 

Comment by BLUEBELL on December 21, 2017 at 7:59pm

Edger,

I am so sorry for your loss. I understand the horrible grief you are experiencing. I lost my dear Mom on Valentine's Day of this year. At first I could not sleep, felt sad all the time, cried sometimes for hours and had a lot of anxiety, especially in the morning. You may not believe it now, but the intensity does ease up with time. It has for me. This week has been tough again because it is my first Christmas without Mom. I do feel a little better today. I am blessed that God gave me that gift.

I found this quote to offer you

"Wishing you peace to bring comfort, courage to face the days ahead and loving memories to forever hold in your heart."

Bluebell

Comment by Sherri on December 21, 2017 at 8:12am

Thanks for sharing everyone I was reading and it did make things a bit better today. Today is a tough day as things come closer I just don't know how I'm going to do this with out her I see the tree and everything and I just cry I miss my mom so much!

Edgar this is a great bunch of people who are always listening and very helpful I feel blessed to have found you guys.

Comment by Theresa on December 21, 2017 at 6:01am

Brett, you brought tears to my eyes telling about your conversation with the lady in the store.
Let me tell you, my mom looked glowing when she passed, at 92 not a wrinkle my husband even commented, I said she is overjoyed at what she has seen, Jesus, I just know it.
Edger
I am so sorry for your loss you have found a group of wonderful people here.
I too did not make to my moms side before she passed.
Everyone today we should all think of one special thing we did with our moms and how happy we both were knowing you made her happy and she made you happy.
:)

Comment by Edger on December 21, 2017 at 5:45am

I'm dying every single day... I terribly miss my Mommy! She passed away November 25. On Christmas day is her 1 month, the loneliest Christmas in my life and in the family.

She was in coma for just a day. I took the fastest flight home... I was boarding the plane when my brother informed me that she's gone!!!!! I tried talking to her on the phone begging her to wait for me... It's too late... I was numb and inshock the whole flight....

I rushed to her when I arrived. I kissed and hugged her.

Mommy I love you sooo much!

The pain is stabbing... 

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