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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

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Missing my identity 2 Replies

Started by silvia maria. Last reply by silvia maria Aug 5, 2022.

i need my mom

Started by dream moon JO B Aug 13, 2021.

I want my Mommy 1 Reply

Started by Lucinda. Last reply by dream moon JO B Apr 19, 2021.

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Comment by Tanya on March 24, 2017 at 10:30am

Nancy, grieving is hard work because at some point you have to pick yourself up.  So your emotions go up and down.  Thankfully between my daughter and work, I'm busy.  That helps otherwise I would be a mess.  The finality of it all is what sends me in to non-stop tears.  I understand everyone's pain.

Comment by Leila on March 24, 2017 at 7:37am
Theresa, YES!! I almost forgot about this but I used to do the same thing. We would be out for dinner and I'd see a daughter with her elderly mother, and I just kept looking at them thinking how lucky she was to still have her mom. Looking back, I'm sure I made them uncomfortable as I would keep glancing over. About 3 or 4 months ago an lovely lady in her 70's from my meet-up group kind of 'adopted' me. She is widowed and has no children. Of course, it doesn't make me miss my mom any less, but I really enjoy spending time with her. We have lunch regularly and I always look forward to it.
Comment by Theresa on March 24, 2017 at 5:31am

Thank you Nancy yes I wished that we lived closer also it would be great to talk with you

Bluebell, it took me sometime to go shopping, mostly because of panic and anxiety attacks that take over, but I did and still do the same thing I would look at something and think of my mom, and I would see an elderly person and say gosh I miss my mom so much.

Let me tell you I had a customer on Wednesday that when she looked at me she had the same exact color eyes as my mom and my moms were a off hazelish, very odd color, I couldn't stop staring at her it was like I was looking at my mom, it freaked me out a bit, but then I thought hmmm is it?  I don't know....

Comment by Leila on March 23, 2017 at 11:27pm
Tanya,
I just read your post from yesterday. You are SO right!! I have some clothing of my mom's tucked away that I am keeping. One piece is a shirt she used to wear in the 60's that I remember so clearly from when I was a little girl. I also have a threadbare house coat she used all the time. I bought her new ones but she liked that one better. I love to make her signature recipes because I feel like she is right there in the room with me as I make them and breath in the familiar aromas.
And you're right again, MISS does not really describe the feeling. There are times I yearn for my mom so acutely that it physically hurts. Grieving is hard, hard work that never ends.
Comment by Leila on March 23, 2017 at 11:16pm
I'm so sorry, Theresa. It's too bad the lot of us don't live nearer together so we could meet and support one another. One thing I've learned through this is that there are people in our lives who can be thoughtless and judgmental, even though some of them have experienced a similar loss. I suppose their relationships or backgrounds were just different than ours. I wish I could come over and make you a cup of tea and sit with you. Sending prayers and hugs!!
Nancy
Comment by Leila on March 23, 2017 at 10:53pm
Bluebell,
I can relate so well to this. I can't tell you how many times I have said and felt these exact same things. I'd see a recipe that looked good and start to call my mom to tell her about it, I'd create a piece of art but she was no longer here to give it to. I also wished it could just be a horrid nightmare. Sometimes I couldn't believe the way everyone else across the world just went about day to day activities when the world had so dramatically changed. My thoughts and prayers are with you!!
Comment by BLUEBELL on March 23, 2017 at 9:08pm

I went out shopping with a friend today. When I saw a pretty wind chime, I found myself thinking "Mom would like that". But there is no more Mom to get presents for. I miss her. I want her back. I wish this was all a very long, horrible nightmare that I could wake up from. 

Bluebell

Comment by Theresa on March 23, 2017 at 6:29am

Heather, yes I do, I have no one, my husband doesn't even want to hear me talk about it, he ignores me when I do

I have not had a dream about her yet

To me it seems like everyone thinks I should just move on, but I'm not ready, I have thoughts in my head like you wait your parents are still alive, maybe then they will know what I am going through.

Maybe not.

Comment by Heather on March 22, 2017 at 9:33pm
I do the same thing, at least several times a day. My Mom was a diabetic so I had to take the used testing strips back to the pharmacy the other day. I actually sat In the car hugging it, something of hers that I have to let go of and it made me so sad. I cried as I drove away. I keep replaying things in my head and wanting so so much to just see her once more in my dreams. I saw her once in my dream about 5 months after she passed. She didn't say anything, she was passing by a store window ( I was in the store) and I rushed to the window to see if it was her...at first I couldn't see her and thought I had been mistaken...then suddenly she was on the other side of the glass looking at me. She didn't smile or anything just a neutral expression, then she put her hand up to the glass and pressed it there. I put my hand up and touched it to hers against the glass...then I woke up and that was it:-(. Still not sure what that means...that was the only time I have seen her in my dream. Miss her so much...miss having someone who really cares about you and what is happening... I don't have anyone like that at all, I feel so invisible...anyone else feel that way?
Comment by Theresa on March 22, 2017 at 8:44pm
I just had to say when I get in bed at night I have such a hard time - I cry mostly every night and I remember that every night when i used to talk to my mom on the phone when we were hanging up she would say love you...And I think to myself who knew that on Friday night before she died it would be the last time ....
I sit here in bed watching TV and going over things in my mind over and over again
 

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