First, I don't mean to offend anyone.  If you don't agree with my viewpoint, please ignore this post.  I am really only trying to help.

As I have mentioned before, I am a total hardcore skeptic of anything that I can't see, feel, touch, etc.  I am an agnostic, and I look at astrology as total nonsense, for example.  I was a very social, personable, and fun guy to be around.  I liked to drink, tell funny stories, host big parties, tell off-color jokes, and be one of the guys.  I was also mostly "surface," guarded, and kept people at a distance.  Losing my girlfriend, Milagros, has made me small, fragile, scared, sad, lost, and raw, and an overall mess.  I'm lonely, feeling bad about the future, and miss her terribly.  I love her more than I love myself.  I am desperate and need to have even the slimmest form of hope.

Meeting with grief counselors hasn't done much.   I realized that I'm not going to get better this way.  Not that I want to very much, really.  My goal is to keep her with me while I get though the day-to-day stuff.  I don't have to be happy - just functional.  For several weeks, I was.  I was going out with women (but telling them about her), drinking, etc.  It's a band aid.  But now I'm in a down cycle.   You can identify, I'm sure.

Someone here suggested "The Light Between Us," and reading it made me realize that things might not be as final as we think, that there could be hope.   The book lead me to the Forever Family Foundation:  https://www.foreverfamilyfoundation.org/   They are a non-profit organization that is made up of people like us, along with scientific researchers.  

"Love Knows No Death" is a $10 workbook that I have just started to read.  I am at work, so I can't access the associated videos, so I will have to stop until I get home, but I am very impressed so far.  The premise is basically that, okay, we have suffered a severe loss, but that that person isn't really gone.  They still love us, are aware of our pain and sense of loss, and there is a good possibility of contacting them.  I know that I would feel a lot of relief and comfort if I knew that Mila were still with me and that we could communicate.

Here is a quote from the workbook:

"When you will understand – rationally understand – that your loved one has not simply ceased to exist, some of the hopelessness and desperation will go away. When you will realize that, from the spiritual place where he or she lives now, he or she still loves you, then you will open up to the possibility of a contact."

Well, there you have it.  Again, I don't want anyone to be offended.  I wanted to put this out there in case someone is helped by this group, their information, and the workbook.

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Here is the video - I should have included it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6wxeK7BjCw

I am really sorry about the hell that you're going through.  No platitudes from me, I'm just sorry.

"Love Knows No Death" is really, really good.  It's NOT about moving on.

I just watched module one and the doctor believe in reincarnation--if needed-to be at the highest state--this is making me feel
WORSE

I don't recall that.  That would have turned me off, too.  

Hello Morgan,

I am only three months along in the journey after losing my precious husband in June. I think the term 'completely vanished' has to be the most devastating reality. I keep hoping it is all a bad dream and he will just walk in the door- it is surreal when all his stuff is just casually left around as if he will just come in and pick it up ... he always felt himself that there was a life beyond this one and that we could be in touch with those who have died but since he died I have not felt his presence in any way in spite of asking for any sign ( no matter how small) that he is still around. I have also been reading books on quantum physics but have so far found no convincing sense of relief. I have ordered it and am waiting to read the book 'The Light Between Us' and just hoping it will bring some comfort.

 I know life as I knew it will never be the same but may be at some point there will be be something or someone who will convince me that there is more to life than just vanishing after we die.

Helen,  do you have any interest in "Love Knows No Death?"  Here is a quote from the workbook:

"Would your life, here and now, be any different if you were absolutely convinced that:

a) your deceased loved one has not simply vanished out of existence, but that he or she

goes on living in a nonmaterial dimension; and b) from that dimension, he or she can still

see what goes on in your life, occasionally make some form of contact, and, crucially, still

loves you exactly as he or she did before passing?"

 Hi  Jeff,

 It would be a great comfort to know that he 'goes on living in a non material existence'. Thank you ! I will certainly order the book and read 'Love knows No Death'. I think the real problem for me is that in spite of being a Christian I am steeped in a science background so have always all my working life retained some doubt...But to actually know that he can still see what goes on in my life and could occasionally make some form of contact... that would make a wonderful difference to my life.

Hi Helen,

We're on the same page.  That course is only $10 on the non-profit, science-based site foreverfamilyfoundation.org.

Please let me know how it goes.

 Thanks Jeff. I will let you know how it goes.

hi

i no i no on hear evry 1 deals on loss in own way iv lernd on hear i hav i no evry loss is difrnt but 1 thng evry loss is so bledin panfulll we all no it

I was given the book "The Light Between Us," and highly recommend it. It has been 3 1/2 years since losing my mother. My rock. My sister is at the hospital right now and I am filling in for my mother in a way I have never had to do before. Her daughter is mentally disabled (28 years old) and I physically cannot deal with her. The best things that have happened is since my niece is on SSI the hospital has been actively helping me navigate this new journey. My mother left me in charge and I am doing the best that I can each and everyday. We have no choice but to put one foot in front of the other and soldier on without our most important people in our lives. One hour at a time and also if we can one day at a time. I have been on the one hour at a time for one week now. Just do what you can and keep going. Not easy at all but just keep on keeping on. One day we will be done here and hopefully rest easy.

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