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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

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Missing my identity 2 Replies

Started by silvia maria. Last reply by silvia maria Aug 5, 2022.

i need my mom

Started by dream moon JO B Aug 13, 2021.

I want my Mommy 1 Reply

Started by Lucinda. Last reply by dream moon JO B Apr 19, 2021.

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Comment by Theresa on May 1, 2016 at 9:59am

Jane

My gosh not a good situation, but you've managed to get through 19 months.   We just have to keep living our lives.

I am sure that when my time comes to go home, my mom will be waiting for me.

I also miss my mom so much, its going on 5 months......

December will not be a good month for me, on the 14th my dad passed, on the 19th mom and the 24th my grandmom. 

Comment by Jane on May 1, 2016 at 9:10am

I lost my family as well as my Mom.  Soon after my Mom passed my oldest brother turned his ugly horns on me.  I've given up trying to find the underlying cause.  Soon after my sister decided to not help in going through my Mom's things... cleaning out her house etc.  I merely texted her and said 'it's not fair that I'm doing this alone'.  She didn't like that and has since quit talking to me.  I have one brother who is decent.  I cry that my Mom would be so sad as to what has become of her 4 kids, but I've done my best.. and I can't fix it.  Some days I just cry so hard for all that I have lost :(   I miss my Mom so much. It's going on 19 months :(

Comment by Jane on May 1, 2016 at 8:47am

Oh Theresa, I'm so sorry.  I know that pain.  I left the hospital at 10:30pm talked to my Mom at 11:15pm when I got home.. said I loved her, hung up, and at 11:45pm my brother called and said the hospital called and my Mom had had a stroke.  How in that little time did all of this happen :(  She never recovered and we lost her a week later.

I'm so sorry about the pain of your Mom, I know it too well.  It's okay to repeat your story, I guess it's how we heal.  It's impossible to hold all this pain in.  

Hugs

Comment by Theresa on May 1, 2016 at 7:59am

Mother's Day coming next week, what makes it even harder is that I used to go every Sunday to my moms.

Some days I feel so sad and I try to remember the good times, but sometimes I just can't hold back the tears. 

It feels so strange not talking to her every day, or the last time I heard her voice. I have saved her voicemails, but I am afraid to listen to them.

The last words she said to me were you know which hospital right, I said yes mom Bryn Mawr, she said ok let me hangup I'm getting a pain in my shoulder, that was at 7:40am and by 8:40am, with me standing there in the hospital looking at her as they were doing chest compressions the dr asked me a bunch of questions like does she have diabetes, no, did you know she has a clogged artery in her leg I said yes, then he said does she have an aneurysm and I said yes an aortic he said do you want to continue doing this and I said is she breathing he said no, then he stated time of death 8:40.

She was not sick, her heart just stopped, her doctor said it was hypertension as the secondary cause, primary cardiac arrest.

I miss her, I hope this gets better for me.

I apologize if I already said this story before, I just feel better saying it  to people that will listen, my husband is not much on this kind of stuff.

Comment by Megan on April 29, 2016 at 8:58am
Nancy, I am dreading the year mark - sending hugs your way. I am so sorry to hear about your father. I will be thinking of you, him, and your family. I hope that he recovers soon. Xx
Comment by Leila on April 29, 2016 at 2:27am
April 18th marked one year since melanoma brain cancer carried my sweet mom away to heaven, just 10 short weeks after her diagnosis. Here I am, still missing my mom every day. I miss everything about her, but especially being able to talk to her about all the little day to day things of life.
These last several weeks have been especially difficult as my dad has been hospitalized with cardiac symptoms several times, had surgery, and spent more time in a nursing home for rehab. He was released last week and did well until tonight. Now here we are in the hospital since 2:30 am when my dad started having severe chest pain and shortness of breath again. How I wish my mom was here. I want and need to talk to her. It's incredibly stressful to see my dad going through this and not have my mom here. I don't know what to do. My mom was so strong. She could make everything better by giving a hug. Just looking upon her sweet face made everything right with the world. I'm not her. I can't make anything better. I'm scared and don't know how to do this alone.
Comment by Lisa Green on April 27, 2016 at 10:19am

Joanna,

I find that when I am most busy doing my normal work thing, carting my son off to soccer and taking care of things for my dad that I too don't get emotional and cry as much. But, at the end of the day when I finally get to slow down is when it hits me that Mom is not here anymore and I can't talk to her about my busy day and tell her everything that happened. I don't think there is any rule book that says how much or how little we cry and grieve that is normal. We all have to find our way through this horrible time in our lives in our own way. Whatever helps you the most, is what you do and its ok. I am glad you got your moms contact and web page back on your phone. I would have been infuriated at that. I held in or was just numb to moms passing during the first few weeks because of all the things I had to get done to make arrangements for her funeral and to take care of legal things after the fact. I cried a lot but I actually feel the loss much deeper now and it's been a little over two months. It sets in that this is a permanent thing and not just a thing that just happened. It hurts bad and there's no cure. There's no way to fix it. That is the hardest part for me. I have always found a way to make things better in my life in any situation. But this one I am powerless over. 

Comment by Lisa Green on April 26, 2016 at 3:52pm

Jill,

Thank you for your suggestions and sharing how you got through it. I think I just might adopt a few of those ideas. I like the balloon idea especially for the kids. thanks so much. Everyone on here says it doesn't really get any easier but somehow we just learn to live without them. It just really takes a toll on ya. 

Comment by jill smith on April 26, 2016 at 2:49pm

Lisa,

The first of everything is so hard, especially Mother's Day. I dread hearing all those ads too. My mom passed Oct. 14. of 2014. My first Mother's Day without her we planted a lemon tree in her honor (she loved her lemon trees) and we all wrote messages attached to helium balloons(big hit with the kids) and let them go. We also made one of her dishes she loved. I think it helped me to have a plan on how to honor her on that day. 

I still have moments all the time where I feel the need to call her (forgetting for a moment she has passed) and tell her something. We have been doing it our whole lives. 

Comment by Lisa Green on April 26, 2016 at 2:05pm

I'm missing my mom a lot this week. It's been two months and two days since she died. It still tears me up to even write those words. Mom knew me better than anyone and knew how to to always support me and lift me up. I am who I am because of her and how much she poured out her love. Some days I get busy doing things and then for a second I think to myself, call mom and tell her about your day. Then reality slaps me in the face again. This happens so many times during the course of the day. I'm dreading Mother's Day in a few weeks. I can't turn on the radio or tv without hearing commercials about not forgetting your mom on Mother's Day. I don't know how anyone could forget their mom anyway but its difficult hearing those and seeing the signs in stores right now. I'm trying to plan ahead with my sister some things to do on Mother's Day so we don't go through this first one aimlessly and a mess, although I think we will anyway. We plan to go to mom and dads and have a cookout with dad and my brother whose coming in from out of state. It will be a hard day for sure. My mom was my anchor. She gave me what I need to finish the days, weeks, months and years of my life and I know I will because I have too. I carry her with me everywhere I go. I miss her so much. Thank you all for listening and for sharing your own stories. They help me cope on days that hardest.  

 

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