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Traumatic, Sudden Loss

Members: 942
Latest Activity: Oct 5, 2022

Traumatic, Sudden Loss

I have started this group for people who like myself have suddenly, tragically and traumatically lost a loved one.

My mom died 8 weeks ago (August 17, 2009) She had been sick but I did not know the true extent of her illness. Her doctor knew she did not have long and I went to each doctor visit and talked to him at the hospital and he never told me and I do not believe mom knew either. I am not sure.

I found my mom sitting up on her bed and I know I knew she was gone. I still am in deep shock and cry occasionally but only a minute or two. Then I am back to not feeling or feel numb.

Discussion Forum

Loss of boyfriend due to motorcycle 3 Replies

Hello everyone, my name is Brittany. I am new to this and not quiet sure how this works. My therapist pointed me in this direction so i thought i would give it a try. I am 24 years old from…Continue

Started by Brittany. Last reply by Denise D Jan 31, 2021.

New to the Group

Hello All-I am a new widow as my husband passed away April 21, 2018 at the age of 49. He suffered a heart attack and had no previous history of any heart conditions nor does it run in his family.  I…Continue

Started by Danielle Wood Aug 2, 2018.

Struggling 2 Replies

Hi. My name is Cristal. I lost the love of my life on July 2nd. He had leukemia and had no idea. I begged him to see a doctor in the months prior to his death but he would not do it. He also suffered…Continue

Started by Cristal. Last reply by Cristal Aug 1, 2018.

My "Little Brother"

Hi Everyone, My name is Carlyn, and I live in the Ft. Lauderdale area. I joined this site because a very dear friend of mine was killed in a hit-and-run accident in May. My friend Rick, whom I called…Continue

Tags: violent, death, loss, sudden, friend

Started by Carlyn Jorgensen Aug 28, 2017.

Comment Wall

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Comment by Felicia Evans on June 19, 2015 at 4:44am
Hi everyone. I am so sorry for your loss. My dad passed away in 2010. I still miss him a lot. He was so funny, smart, and he always knew just to say. My great nieces and nephew's dad passed away this past November. It is devastating for them, especially the oldest ones. Plus he passed away suddenly. So while I am grieving the loss of my dad, I'm trying to comfort them too. I allow myself to cry because crying is healing. As for Father's Day, I'm at the point now where I celebrate my dad's life for Father's Day. It's tough but I do it. It's hard when I see all the stuff in the stores but I ignore it for the most part. For my nephew's birthday I took his older kids to his gravesite and we spent time there together. I let them talk, cry, play music low, and I suggested they each bring a balloon to let go. They did and it was very therapeutic. I even let one go too. I overheard them talking and they are going to do the same thing on Father's Day. I'm glad it helped in some small way. It is still tough dealing with the loss but we were able to honor their dad in some way. Of course I almost lost it when I saw his baby daughter siting on the ground near her dad's gravesite. I held it together for them and cried a little. It really helped...if only for a moment. We need to allow ourselves to grieve. The only way to it is to go through it. The feelings don't go away they just get more bearable...one day at a time.
Comment by Gabrielle on June 19, 2015 at 1:17am
Hi Denise. How about a framed photo of your husband and his son?
Comment by Denise on June 18, 2015 at 9:11pm
And just to vent ........I hate life now!!!! My little boy was my life and now I'm just lost
Comment by Denise on June 18, 2015 at 9:08pm
Sorry if I shouldn't have brought up the subject
Comment by Denise on June 18, 2015 at 9:07pm
Hi anyone. What would I say or do or just whatever on father's day to my husband because we lost out 8yr.old son 7 months ago . Mother's day he brought me some roses but didn't say a word . I can't get him flowers and definitely not a card. Do I even say anything?
Comment by alice smithline on June 18, 2015 at 6:41pm

i lost my husband a few weeks ago do to heart failure. and right now i feel like i have been kicked in the teeth. it hurts alot and i miss him alot and i wish he did not have to go like he did. he was fine that morning and he said he was getting dressed to watch tv. i found him dead sitting up in bed a few hours later.

Comment by Michelle B. on June 17, 2015 at 10:18am

What happens on Father's Day?  My 3 teenagers lost their dad last fall in a tragic accident that also killed his brother/their uncle.  The media is bombarding us with Father's Day sales propaganda, it's everywhere.  I still grieve for my own father, who died 25 years ago.  But I'm the adult now, and I need to find out how to get these kids through the next several days.  I downplayed Mother's Day a great deal when it came around, just made comments about what a commercialized "holiday" it was, kind of preparing them for my reaction when Father's Day came up.  Don't know if that was a good or bad idea though. I'm also on a rant about someone saying it was "his time."  It was NOT his time - he would have enjoyed seeing his kids at their band/orchestra activities, day to day silly stuff they did, going to ball games, movies, cookouts, holding his dogs, seeing our oldest go to the prom, etc. 

Comment by Gabrielle on May 26, 2015 at 2:46am
I am also fed up of hearing that my sister is in a better place. I'm pretty sure she'd rather be continuing her dream of seeing the world rather than sitting as a pile of ash in an urn. She was only 22 years old.
Comment by Michele on May 25, 2015 at 8:19pm

I feel the same way it makes me so mad for someone to tell me my sister is in a better place and what a great life she had, I'm sorry she just turned 50 she should have many more happy years ahead of her and the same with my brother in law. Its so depressing to see how life just seems to go on for everyone and I am drowning in grief and depression. The more time that goes along I just see how much of a void there is in my life. Its hard for me to cope with the fact that my life will never be the same. No more holidays or no more dinners no more sister trips. I try to go through the motions of work and day to day life but I still find myself crying daily and hearing a song or seeing something that just floods the realization that i will never see her again .........

Comment by Felicia Evans on May 25, 2015 at 6:09pm
I feel like that too. Every time I think about the future without my more like a brother nephew it makes me feel some kind of way. I still can't believe he's gone, especially on a day like today. He always invited me and my husband to spend holidays with him and his family. He knew I couldn't have kids and it warmed my heart to be around him and my 7 great nieces and nephews. He also told me he loved being around us. We often talked about how we were going to look and be when we got old together. I don't take anything for granted anymore. I can't imagine my life without him. We were so close. I'm tired of people telling me he's in a better place or everything happens for a reason and all of the rest of those cliches' I love and miss him and I wish he were here. For now, I go on...like I said, one day at a time. The nights after my husband goes to bed, are the hardest.
 

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