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Comment by dream moon JO B on August 22, 2014 at 2:51pm

im so sorry rachel da dawn charles e1 frinds do go weid on us evn famly as well 

u get told dont do ths stop dong art wish iv dun iv stopt tkng pics as well 

danny i wish i cud get grief counelng s as wel but thrs is non in area

im sic of death thes lst 2 yrs or so its bean mutli loss non stop  

Comment by charles daley on August 22, 2014 at 9:40am

rachel i'm so sorry for your loss  i know how you feel regarding your friends because the way i feel i have no friends any of my wife's friends they don't call to see how i'm doing . anyway rachel try to get some help they will be able to help

Comment by dawn larvan on August 22, 2014 at 5:06am

Rachel I feel for you I have plenty of friends but I've never felt,so alone in all my life it's only been 12 weeks but already my friends are slipping away if I didn't have my beautiful dog I wouldn't get dressed or go out but I have to take him for a walk I don't care what I look like I just walk in the woods and I don't feel so alone bless you

Comment by Danny on August 22, 2014 at 4:15am

take it slow Rachel.  Everybody is too involved in their own life today.  I just read the web and books related to this to take it one day at a time. And try to find a grief counselor if you can.

Comment by Rachel on August 22, 2014 at 3:41am

Is anyone awake? I can't sleep anymore. I'm good if I get 2 or 3 hours a night. Then I'm up for the rest of the night.
I'm beginning to feel cursed. My only child is gone, my mother has Altzhiemers, my dad is getting old,
my boyfriend left me, and all my friends are gone and living their lives. My brother and sisters all live in different cities and they have their children and grand children. It's so hard to read or hear about how my so called friends are out having a good time with each other. And with the same breath they tell me, "I'm there for you". But they're not. They're not calling or inviting. I'm texting or calling them. And then I get to hear what they're doing. In all reality I have no true "friend" or "friends". I just want to die. I hurt so bad from a completely BROKEN & SHARTERED HEART!!!! I feel like Job. I feel God is gone, he abandoned me. My prayers are just void to Him. I don't understand????

Comment by Rachel on August 20, 2014 at 2:04am

Another sleepless night. I still can't believe my child is gone. And I still can't have a good cry for her. In my mind I just feel she's at her home in San Antonio (3 hours away from my home town). What's wrong with me??? It's so hard being here in my home alone. I have no one to lean on. My friends are becoming more and more distant. They think I'm crazy. One even told me I was acting silly. And I needed to accept it and move on. Like its that simple???? I was so hurt. (If they only knew!!!!!). If they only knew what WE are ALL going through. I feel so very much ALONE.

Comment by charles daley on August 19, 2014 at 5:32pm

could someone give me some advice it is 4 years since my wife passed on and my mom 5 months since she passed on and to this day i continue to blame my self for their deaths it is like it was yesterday when they died all i know is i really miss them so much i have no faith i feel i have nothing left to give i'm going though the motions my wife's birthday is next month and since i have a plan to get drunk to ease the pain but that wouldn't  help i know they are in heaven and watching me going though this does this get any easier let me know

Comment by Lynn Boyd on August 18, 2014 at 10:59am

Oh Rachel, I'm so sorry for your loss.  Of course it's not fair.  Life is not fair. None of us is promised a tomorrow.  I know how scary this profound loss can be, and I tried for weeks and weeks to understand why a tiny flu bug killed my husband.  Here's an idea for the wedding....have a short ceremony where bride and groom light a candle in memory of your daughter, to celebrate her life and assure everyone that she is there in spirit.  Your pastor or chaplin could suggest the exact words to use.  We cannot understand these great mysteries of life and death.  We will never, ever "get over" our losses, we will never, ever forget them.  I promise you will not always feel this way.  I pray that the God of your understanding helps you get through this terrible time. Feel the love of this grieving community.  We are all dealing with this awful pain, but together we can find comfort.  Many blessings to you.

Comment by Dreama on August 18, 2014 at 9:38am

many gentle hugs Rachel 

Comment by Rachel on August 17, 2014 at 11:43pm

How? Why? Why? Why? How am I suppose to get thru this? I hurt so much. I'm so scared to let go. I'm so scared to give into believe she is really gone.. My daughters best friend's wedding is quickly approaching. She was suppose to be her maid of honor. All it does is remind me how she will not be here for that day. Nor will I ever experience the joy of her wedding day. It's not fair. She was my only baby. My only child. She was to young. All of our children were to young to die. It's not fair!!!! It's not fair!!!! Please, please someone help me to understand.

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