I just finished reading your blog post about your mother. Your story is a moving one and it truly has touched my heart. I would love to talk to you more about it.
I am part of a research team at Saint Louis University that is conducting a research project about how families communicate about making medical decisions for loved ones at the end-of-life.If this is something you would be comfortable with, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Hi Rachel , It was a pleasure chatting with you this evening, I am sad for your loss and I hope you feel peace while singing and remembering your mom this weekend. Take good care of yourself . peace xo Niecy
Please don,t break... There is help and comfort... There are people that care like all of us. The greatest help though is from God. Throw your burden on him, he promises to help. Isaiah 41:10 & 13.
I care too! If you email me at email@example.com I will give you my phone number. I will keep you in my prayers.
Hey Rachel, I hope things are still working out well for you with the new guy. Life has its own way of going on no matter how hard our situations are. I know you are so happy and that in itself makes me happy and hopeful that one day, I'll be able to smile with abandon and look foward to the little things life has to offer. God Bless.
Hi Rachel; these are the times I wish I had your number. Is there any way we can talk? I'm so worried about you. I've had some rough days and been sickly but with my little one, I push myself. I'm now out oftown visiting a friend and trying to take it easy.
Hi Rachel; I'm so glad to see you posting again. I understand how hard it can be at times since I too get depressed reading other peoples experience with grief. I was just very concerned about you cause of your previous hosptilizations. Its good to know that you've been able to visit your moms grave lately. I've not been able to do that. I just want to believe that mom isn't there. So many times I wish she was cremated, its so hard to know her remains are in the ground, it just doesn't feel right. Maybe one day I'll have the courage to visit her grave. My yahoo id is kanyoni16; hopefully we can chat sometime.
Thanks for your response Rachel, it was kind of you to take the time to reach out. So nice to hear from someone who understands that one's Mom's clothes aren't "just clothes". When I told my husband that I had given away most of Mom's clothes, he said "oh, that's good." I think he was happy to have one less thing cluttering up the closet!
Rachel; I've not seen you here for a while and I'm starting to worry about you. Please post something so we may know you are ok. I've had a very tough time the last two weeks; my grief is so deep sometimes that I long for death but I know my time is not now and I'll try my best to hold on for now. Please my friend, let me know how you are.
Thank you for embracing me into this community of such loving and caring human beings. I am so greatful to have found this website. That cancer...that damn cancer. I told God the other night that if he needed a soul to take..mine was his. If a mother is sick and her children need her..take me instead. If a father is sick and his children and wife need him..take me. I know this sounds like drama, but I really would give up my life in order to spare someone else of the pain of loss. I have no children and really no close family. I am completely alone. With the exception of my wonderful Golden Retriever Rudy and my 3 kitties Gerda, Will and Petrone. They cover my body at night like a blanket. They feel my pain. Make it through today...she what tomorrow brings.
My mothers name was Nancy. Like you and your mom she and i were the best of friends. Shopping buddies, dinners together, movies, hanging out all of the time. My sisters are not talking to me - lots of drama. I feel completely alone. My dad left us when we were kids. Mom raised us alone. I am so glad to find this site. Sue
Hi Rachel. How long since your mom died did you start to feel any sense of well being? I just feel like my heart is in a million little pieces and my life is so empty. Its just an overwhelming feeling of loss and sadness. I don't know when the sun will ever shine in my soul. Its just so hard. Take care
Hi Rachel; thanks for your message. Weekends are a little crazy for me cuz I'm busy running around and not much time on the computer. You can add me to your yahoo messenger; it firstname.lastname@example.org. I look foward to chatting with you. You are a great inspiration to me, I feel like I've known you a long time. Be Blessed dear.
Just read your email. I'm 55 and lost my mom 3 years ago to he final insult, Alzheimer's. I lost my purpose and meaning in life that day and it has not returned. I miss her so much that it is literally unbearable. I struggle to put one foot in front of the other each day. I have no children so really feel along in the world.
You said you cuddle her teddy, this is really similar to wt i do. except i hold on to a gift she gave to me not long before she fell ill. I no it sounds silly but i hold on to a swimming costume which she bought me and feel so close to her and so special as she chose that for me. She gave me her necklace, she took it off and put it on me. It has an angel on it. it is silver. I had complimented her and said it looked lovely then she said you can have it I want you to have it. Abit like a plastic table cloth i said i liked on her table. She straight away said i could have it. It is now on my table. These things really help cos they were from just her to me.
I know i cant keep feeling angry at my dad and also at myself, but the things he said before she even got ill, like jokes about my mums funeral and a few weeks before she got really ill seemed like, all of a sudden, as she seemed fine a few weeks before. My mum and i were chatting on her sofa, and he walked past, smiled and said, hmm Im making your mums last days as comfortable as possible. Why would he say that, then a few weeks later she can hardly walk, couldnt talk i couldnt believe the difference in such a short time. He was doing her home dialysis. She had a stroke, why didnt he rush her to hospital. Can you see why i keep thinking he was partly or even completely to blame. Although i am confused cos he has cried buckets and has said he has felt he wished he had gone with her. i dont understand. But i do know my mum loved him so much and made excuses for his putn her down, although he was alot nicer to her than years before when we were kids.
Think I’ve mentioned someplace on this site that sharing meals and cooking was always very important to my husband...it was also a big part of my mother’s life and one of the ways she showed affection and concern for those in her life, they were similar in many ways, including that one. My husband used to tell people that he’d always “had trouble distinguishing food, love, and sex” — he’d say it in a joking way, but he really believed that in some way, at the deepest level, they were all one…See More
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"Thanks for checking in Mel. I had to look up aphasia. I would hazard a guess that your neural system has taken a beating from your grief and your brain just wants to shut down. I know I have times where I stutter during a breakdown…"
"Susan B, I am so sorry. To try and live without that person who was by your side for 52 years is a living nightmare. I had 35 married years but 55 of knowing him (since second grade). That much history buries the person left…"
Thanks for your kind post. I feel the same as you about getting another pet. No other dog could ever take her place and no man could ever take the place of My Dear Husband, Julian. As with you, I don't want to face anymore deaths…"
Hello Morgan, Bluebird, Linda at al. I'm sorry it has been so awfully long since my last contact. A Year? I have always read the posts, though and have felt the same horrible burning pain I have the last, nearly 5 years since Nancy left me. I have had a couple of tia's including a lengthy bout of "aphasia". It was almost comedic as I couldn't talk but kept trying to tell the emt's which hospital to drop me at. This year, I have come to the concludion will be my year, 2020 will be the year I…See More
"I feel the same as both of you. morgan, I'm sorry you had a particularly bad day -- I certainly know what that's like. I hope today is easier for you. Linda, I know what you mean about your dog. When our cat died, aside from the sadness I…"
I just wish I could have died with Julian. Like you, everyday I just go through motions. I am blessed with my Sweet Dog, Babie J. I am living for her. She now has dementia and it is so sad to watch her declining. She has been by side…"
"Maybe open yourself up, try to ride that love and passion I see in you. You loved your husband so deeply, focus on that. Maybe we are still here because we need to evolve a bit more or do something that God wants us to do.
looking back I feel you…"
"If you focus on the light and the good, that’s is God! I have felt it, I don’t know anything about plans or why people get taken before others but I do know that wherever that next realm is I’m ready to go I am not…"
"That's great that you have no doubt about the existence of an afterlife. I doubt there's a god, but if there is one I'm not convinced it's a loving God, as it allowed my husband to die young(-ish) and one week after our wedding.…"
Over the years I have thought that Bluebird gets it much more than almost everyone who has written about this - at least from my point of view. At the root of this, I think, it's the absence of their presence that hurts so much. I…"